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should we have a cool off?

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should we have a cool off?

Postby charlotte » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:09 pm

my boyfriend will be reviewing for his board exams this november. i know that he has to be serious and he won't be meeting me that much. but it hurts whenever he tells me that our relationship needs to li-low at the moment. fine, accepted. but what really hurts me is this- he might not be able to meet me most of the time even on a weekend since i'm not his priority right now, but his board exams. i already offered him a cool off since i'll be out of his system for the next six months. is it right? i just can't see the reason of hanging on to our relationship if he don't even prioritize his relationship with me. what i mean is that he shouldn't make me feel like i'm nothing to him. he tells me that what he is doing is for our future. i hate to lose communication with him.i only demand a single text msg a day and just at least 3 hours of quality time every weekend. but he just tells me that he'll try to meet me but is unsure.
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Postby Dixie » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:16 pm

I think he should spare some time with you even if he's got exams. When I was at college and had exams I studied during the weekdays and when the weekend came I hung out with my boyfriend. I usually went back home earlier on Saturday in order to study, we'd just go to dinner and that would be all; he understood I had to study. But I didn't stop seeing him.
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Postby francine » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:19 pm

hmm... i understand your point charlotte. THAT'S TOO MUCH!!! hmp! :evil: why can't he even send you a txt message? is too much to ask? is it such a big deal having at least this slightest communication with him?! :evil: totally not fair! have you talked to him about this one? but i guess, having a cool-off won't do any good at all and won't even solve the issue. try to talk to him first. tell him what you feel about this. and if he still doesn't want to agree, then fine! leave him with his decision. but don't threat him or anything. fine! just follow what he wants while he's having a review. then, deal with it/him after his review. :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil:
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Postby charlotte » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:19 pm

yeah you're right. that is what i was telling him. i've been into law school before and even though i've got lots of hell subjects, i still get to see him once in awhile but not that long though. may be i should talk to him personally and demand for some quality time. i'll let you know the results. thanks dixie! i really appreciate that! :cry: :wink: :D
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Postby francine » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:22 pm

you're right dix. :wink: i remember, when i had a board exam review.... my boyfriend decided to take the next board exam so that we could still hang around with each other. isn't he so nice.............. :roll: :roll: :roll: :oops: :oops: :oops: :P :P :P :wink: :wink: :wink:
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Postby charlotte » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:23 pm

francine wrote:hmm... i understand your point charlotte. THAT'S TOO MUCH!!! hmp! :evil: why can't he even send you a txt message? is too much to ask? is it such a big deal having at least this slightest communication with him?! :evil: totally not fair! have you talked to him about this one? but i guess, having a cool-off won't do any good at all and won't even solve the issue. try to talk to him first. tell him what you feel about this. and if he still doesn't want to agree, then fine! leave him with his decision. but don't threat him or anything. fine! just follow what he wants while he's having a review. then, deal with it/him after his review. :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil: :evil:

he told me that teh reason why he don't want to communicate with me is to avoid missing me. he gets to think of me everytime i get in touch with him. kindda weird right? but he told me that if he passes next year we might get married and that's teh reason why he wanted to concentrate to rush things up.he wanna make sure that he'll pass it. we haven't talk formally yet but i'll get in touch with him this weekend. we'll need some tete-a-tete. tahnks francine! :wink:
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Postby Dixie » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:25 pm

Yes Grace ;)

Lianne you should talk to him and make things clear. Tell him you understand he has to study and that those exams are really important for him, but remind him that your relationship is very important as well. And regarding the text issue, I don't believe he cannot at least text you ONCE a day. No excuses for that.
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Postby charlotte » Fri Nov 05, 2004 9:29 pm

Dixie wrote:Yes Grace ;)

Lianne you should talk to him and make things clear. Tell him you understand he has to study and that those exams are really important for him, but remind him that your relationship is very important as well. And regarding the text issue, I don't believe he cannot at least text you ONCE a day. No excuses for that.

the text thing...he said he'll give his mobile phone to me. and he'll just call me at home when he is available. how the hell would he know that i'm home since i work at night and have different shifts. aaarrrgggh!. i really need to talk to him asap. thanks francine and dixie. :D
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Postby RedRose » Sun Nov 07, 2004 4:02 pm

I think your bf was absolutizing his examination. it wasn't a nice way to spare all time for the uncoming exam. it won't affect his exam that much to meet you only on each weekend.

I experienced many examinations in the past, so I know that taking each exam easy is the best way to pass it!
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