EnglishClub
Home Learn English Teach English MyEnglishClub

Please note that these ESL Forums are NOT part of MyEnglishClub. To post at these ESL Forums please register ↑ first.


Pre-Nuptial Agreements

Games, contests and jokes. Have fun!

Moderators: Vega, EC

Pre-Nuptial Agreements

Postby Dixie » Fri Nov 19, 2004 9:22 pm

A secretary for a foreign embassy was entertaining a wealthy foreign ambassador during lunch at a very expensive restaurant in New York.
The ambassador was so enthralled by the beauty and presence of this secretary that he asked her to marry him. The secretary was startled, but remembered that her boss told her never to insult foreign dignitaries, so she decided to let him down easy.

"I'll only marry you under three conditions."

"Anything, anything," said the ambassador.

"First, you must buy me a 14-karat gold wedding band with a 72 carat diamond, along with a 28 inch studded matching necklace for our engagement."

Without hesitation, the ambassador picked up his cellular phone, called his personal accountant, told him the instructions, and said, "Yes, yes, I buy, I buy!"

The secretary thought that her first request was too easy, so she thought of a more difficult situation.

"Second, I want you to build me a 58-acre mansion in the richest part of the Hamptons along with a 40-acre summer home in the sweetest vineyards of France."

The ambassador picked up his phone, called his personal broker in New York, then called another broker in France, and after his quick conversation, he said, "Yes, yes, I build, I build!"

The secretary was very startled, and knew she must think of a final request that would be impossible to live up to.

"Finally," she said. "I'll only marry you if you have a 10-inch penis."

A sad face befell the ambassador, and he cupped his face in his hands. After weeping in his native language for a few minutes, the ambassador slowly lifted his head and said, "Ok, ok, I cut, I cut!"
User avatar
Dixie
Miss EnglishClub.com 2006
Miss EnglishClub.com 2006
 
Posts: 9856
Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2004 2:08 pm
Location: Catalunya
Status: English Teacher

Postby galicano » Fri Nov 19, 2004 9:37 pm

oh how i wish i could have that length... not to cut it of course.. heheheh.
I'll slice you...
I'll dice you...
I'll chop you into pieces!! hiyah!


Image
User avatar
galicano
Gold Member
 
Posts: 114
Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2004 12:57 am
Location: Philippines

Postby francine » Fri Nov 19, 2004 11:35 pm

:shock: :shock: :shock:
i thought his' is shorter than a 10 inch p***s. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Image
User avatar
francine
Platinum Member
 
Posts: 771
Joined: Mon Sep 13, 2004 9:21 pm
Location: Filipinas

Postby Dixie » Sat Nov 20, 2004 10:13 am

Well, Grace, you've got the chance to check it out. I am too far away... :P
User avatar
Dixie
Miss EnglishClub.com 2006
Miss EnglishClub.com 2006
 
Posts: 9856
Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2004 2:08 pm
Location: Catalunya
Status: English Teacher

Postby francine » Sat Nov 20, 2004 6:47 pm

Dixie wrote:Well, Grace, you've got the chance to check it out. I am too far away... :P

naughty dixie! :twisted: :twisted: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Image
User avatar
francine
Platinum Member
 
Posts: 771
Joined: Mon Sep 13, 2004 9:21 pm
Location: Filipinas

Re: Pre-Nuptial Agreements

Postby sweethuman » Mon Jul 04, 2011 11:05 am

:lol:
User avatar
sweethuman
Rough Diamond Member
 
Posts: 1206
Joined: Tue May 10, 2011 7:18 am
Status: Other


Return to Entertainment

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 8 guests