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Urban Legends

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Urban Legends

Postby Dixie » Fri Oct 22, 2004 11:33 pm

> > > > >
> > > > >Urban Legends Live!
> > > > >
> > > > > > >A man who shovelled snow for an hour to clear a space for
his
car
> > > > > > >during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to
find
a
> > > > > > >woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > >**********
> > > > > > >After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean
bus
> > driver
> > > > > > >found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be
> > transporting
> > > > > > >from Harareto Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit
his
> > > > > > >incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and
offered
> > > > > > >everyone waiting there a free ride.
> > > > > > >He
> > > > > > >then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital,
telling
the
> > > > > > >staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to
bizarre
> > > > > > >fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
> > > > > > >*************
> > > > > > >An American teenager was in the hospital yesterday
recovering
> from
> > > > > > >serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When
asked
> how
> > > > > > >he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was
simply
> > > > > > >trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving
train
> > > > >before he
> > > > >was hit.
> > > > > > >*****************
> > > > > > >A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to
give
> her
> > an
> > > > > > >examination to determine the cause of her daughter's
swollen
> > abdomen.
> > > > >
> > > > > > >It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say,"Your
daughter
is
> > > > >pregnant."
> > > > > > >The
> > > > > > >mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor
that
> her
> > > > > > >daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her
> reputation
> > by
> > > > >
> > > > > > >having sex with a boy. The doctor faced the window and
silently
> > > > > > >watched the horizon. The mother became enraged and
screamed,
> "Quit
> > > > > > >looking out the window! Aren't you paying attention to
me?"
"Yes,
> > of
> > > > > > >course I am paying attention ma'am. It's just that the
last
time
> > this
> > > > >
> > > > > > >happened, a star appeared in the East, and three wise men
came.
> And
> > I
> > > > >
> > > > > > >was hoping that they would show up again.
> > > > > > >**************
> > > > > > >When his 38-calibre revolver failed to fire at its
intended
> victim
> > > > > > >during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would be
robber
James
> > > > > > >Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder: He
peered
down
> > the
> > > > >
> > > > > > >barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
> > > > > > >******************
> > > > > > >The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a
> meat-cutting
> > > > > > >machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a
claim
to
> > his
> > > > > > >insurance company. The company, suspecting negligence,
sent
out
> one
> > > > > > >of its men to have
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > >a look for himself. He tried the machine out and lost a
finger.
> The
> > > > > > >chef's claim was approved.
> > > > > > >********************
> > > > > > >A passenger in a taxi tapped the driver on the shoulder to
ask
> him
> > > > > > >something. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab,
nearly
> hit
> > a
> > > > >
> > > > > > >bus, drove up over the curb, and stopped just inches from
a
large
> > > > > > >plate glass window. For a few moments everything was
silent
in
> the
> > > > > > >cab, then the driver> said, "Please, don't ever do that
again.
> You
> > > > > > >scared the daylights out of me." The passenger, who was
also
> > > > > > >frightened, apologised and said he didn't realise that a
tap on
> the
> > > > > > >shoulder could frighten him so much, to which the driver
replied,
> > > > > > >"I'm sorry, it's really not your fault at all. Today is my
first
> > day
> > > > > > >driving a cab. I have been driving a hearse for the last
25
> years."
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Dixie
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Postby galicano » Fri Oct 29, 2004 8:04 pm

har har har!
I'll slice you...
I'll dice you...
I'll chop you into pieces!! hiyah!


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galicano
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Postby pinas » Mon Nov 01, 2004 3:42 pm

funny dixie!!!
dalagang pilipina - a cool chick that is
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pinas
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Postby jonrey10 » Tue Nov 02, 2004 6:48 pm

funny urban legends... :lol:
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c",) I'm here... all the way c",)
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jonrey10
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