WHAT IS A MOTHER (CONTINUING THE PARENT TOPIC)?
Ok you Dad's your turn!!!
>MUM - JOB DESCRIPTION
>
>
>POSITION :
>Mother, Mum, Mama, Mummy, Mumma, Ma
>
>JOB DESCRIPTION:
>Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in
an
>often chaotic environment.
>Candidates must possess excellent communication and
organizational
>skills and be willing to work variable
>hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24
hour
>shifts on call.
>Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive
>camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in
>far away cities.
>Travel expenses not reimbursed.
>Extensive courier duties also required.
>
>RESPONSIBILITIES:
>The rest of your life.
>Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone
needs $5.
>Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly.
>Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be
>able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this
time,
>the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf.
>Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as
small
>gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers.
>Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate
>production of multiple homework projects.
>Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for
>clients of all ages and mental outlooks.
>Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment
>the next.
>Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million
>cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.
>Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.
>Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the
>end product.
>Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial
>work throughout the facility.
>
>POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT &PROMOTION:
>Virtually none.
>Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without
>complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so
that
>those in your charge can ultimately surpass you
>
>
>PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE :
>None required unfortunately.
>On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.
>
>
>WAGES AND COMPENSATION :
>Get this! You pay them!
>Offering frequent raises and bonuses.
> A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the
>assumption that college will help them become financially
>independent.
> When you die, you give them whatever is left.
>The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you
>actually enjoy it and wish you could do more.
>
>BENEFITS:
>Wh ile no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition
>reimbursement,
>no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job
supplies
>limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life
if
>you play your cards right.
>
>(Forward this on to all the Mums you know, in appreciation for
>everything they do on a daily basis, and let them know they are
>appreciated. Plus,
>being a mother, I'm too tired to type everyone's name.)
Can you write something about father? 
