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a confused girl

Posted: Mon Oct 11, 2004 5:55 pm
by fatyma1417
hello this is my first time writing in here and i wonder if you can help me with my problem. Im From Mexico but i was born in the US ans was forced to learn english. im in school right now in the university and still dont know what i might be studying. i have a boyfriend that is from mexico, my mom likes him very much and i love him the problem is that he didnt have the opportunity to study because of money problems. he is a very bright person and he can get to watever he wants to acopplish. now after a year he is asking me to marry him but the rest of my family dont want that because he "does not have nothing to offer me" i love him for what he really is not because how he looks or how big his wallet is. at the same time i feel bad because maybe my family is right.

Should i follow what my heart is telling me or should i lisent to my family? i dont know please help me.

Posted: Mon Oct 11, 2004 7:50 pm
by charlotte
well it's a matter of being practical nowadays. could you live with the one you love with a hungry stomach? as a woman itis normal that you aim for security. try to think living a life with no money at all. you're parents could be right. they are just worried about what your situation will be if you pursue on marrying this guy. thsy just can't afford to see their daughter living a "not so good life".

on the other hand, ou mentioned that your boyfriend is a smart guy. if he doesn't have the money to enroll in some college or university, well he could apply for a scholarship. you may need to postpone the wedding at the moment and talk to him. advs him that the two of you should be working on your future first. both of you should be mentally, emotionally, physically and financially ready. if one of these factors lack, then you could have problems in the future. try to work on your career first, same goes with your guy. if you really are meant with each other, then you'll still end up together in some other time. don't rush on things okay. :wink:

Posted: Mon Oct 11, 2004 8:05 pm
by francine
hi there! :wink: how old are you? are you really prepared on having a family and settle down with him? how about on having a career? how about your personal life?
well, for me, i would rather listen to my family. they know what's best for you. yes, they like the boy but what they don't like is the fact that he's proposing to you even if he can't offer anything for now. and you know what.... if he really loves you... he would prove himself first that he's worthy to be your husband. he should at least have some effort to prove it to you and to your family. your family just wanted the best for you and he should realize that. if he really loves you, he would make an effort to improve his status and have a stable job first. (so that he could offer you something aside from his love.)
if he really loves you, he would not allow you to have the life he's having right now, but, instead, to have a better life.
i know that he's such a nice person. your family would not like him if he's not. but try to talk to him first before jumping to any decisions. i believe that he's a very understanding person. :wink: cheer up girl! :D

Posted: Mon Oct 25, 2004 5:07 pm
by mahboob
you might have heard that love is blind !!!

i would appreciate if you could stick with your family decisions, cuz its practicle and long lasting decision.

i have a few words to say about this, that love can not go same for long, its a fact !
love is more interesting untill you get married, once you get married the love will change gradually. the love will become something else but not love after few years, trust me...
so once you follow your family decision, they will protect you from any desaster or any misunderstanding
i hope you understand what i am trying to say !!!

Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 4:39 am
by tahrer
better to postpone your marriage, coz it will be dificult for bot of you to manage after getting marriage,
try finding some job first, after you be able to be indefendent you can do it.
so many experience teached us like this case, most of them finaly is not succes, and the one who will got most suffering is a girl.
-tahrer- :cry: :cry:

thank you guys

Posted: Fri Oct 29, 2004 3:19 pm
by fatyma1417
:lol: I feel very confortable talking with you and sharing my problems to you thank you for taking your time

Re: thank you guys

Posted: Fri Oct 29, 2004 3:20 pm
by francine
fatyma1417 wrote::lol: I feel very confortable talking with you and sharing my problems to you thank you for taking your time
anytime! :wink: Image