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Re: Family Problem???

Posted: Tue Aug 09, 2005 4:09 am
by Shazzam
Kathleen wrote:Can Anyone advice me of how to handle situation like family problem......
My father and mother dont give their full trust in me..... whenever i go and whatever i do..... Hoping for your help!!!! :cry:
The first thing I have to ask you is how old are you? It might not mean anything to you; but where parents are concerned it is an issue. Secondly have you done anything in the past that would make you parents lose their trust in you? :wink:

Posted: Mon Aug 15, 2005 7:41 pm
by illusion
i know how you feel. as i am an only child my parents treat me like a little girl. The fact I'm already 18 doesn't really seem to bother them at all. 'After all I'm just their baby.' and it's not like that I did something wrong and against their will but they just want to feel secure about me... I hate it because I can never do what most of my mates unless I lie to my parents. I proved many times I am a trustworthy person but that didn't change anything in the case of their behaviour... My advice would be treat them the same way as they do to you haha maybe they'll understand their mistake. Or play with them for instance lie all the time about anything. Maybe they'll learn their lesson, huh?

Posted: Tue Aug 16, 2005 10:29 pm
by Shazzam
illusion wrote:i know how you feel. as i am an only child my parents treat me like a little girl. The fact I'm already 18 doesn't really seem to bother them at all. 'After all I'm just their baby.' and it's not like that I did something wrong and against their will but they just want to feel secure about me... I hate it because I can never do what most of my mates unless I lie to my parents. I proved many times I am a trustworthy person but that didn't change anything in the case of their behaviour... My advice would be treat them the same way as they do to you haha maybe they'll understand their mistake. Or play with them for instance lie all the time about anything. Maybe they'll learn their lesson, huh?
When I read you post it made me :cry:. I understand your frustration, but your parents love you and I'm sure you love them. The sorts of issues that you raise can be fixed with time. Don't make the situation worse by lying to them all the time. If you feel that you want to be treated like an adult, then you have to act like one. It is hard for parents sometimes to accept that their children are growing up; but in most cases it is an overwhelming need in them to keep their children safe. Ok! that is your parents problem, I know, but maybe if you understand that you will understand your parents a little better too.

No one in the world will ever love you the way your parents do. You are the most special and important person in their universe.

Keep talking to each other. Try to have an adult conversation with your Mum first and let her know that you feel betrayed by their inability to trust you. Ask for the opportunity to gain their trust.

I know you guys can work through it. :idea:

Posted: Wed Aug 17, 2005 10:39 am
by illusion
oh don't feel sad about me. I'm all fine. I taught my parents how to treat me after all. I didn't lie to them for real just for fun to scare them a bit and they finally understood their mistake... :-) i don't talk to them. when they ask me ''where are you going?'' i always reply ''away'' and i'm off. i think they are still worried about me but I can see they have much trust in me than before

Posted: Wed Aug 17, 2005 9:32 pm
by Shazzam
illusion wrote:oh don't feel sad about me. I'm all fine. I taught my parents how to treat me after all. I didn't lie to them for real just for fun to scare them a bit and they finally understood their mistake... :-) i don't talk to them. when they ask me ''where are you going?'' i always reply ''away'' and i'm off. i think they are still worried about me but I can see they have much trust in me than before
Still doesn't sound perfect but at least you have worked it out. Do you think it makes your parents sad that you don't want to talk to them? :(

Posted: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:02 am
by illusion
oh I do talk to them but not like you know, before. It's not that 'investigation' conversation anymore. It's me who decides what to talk to them ,not they. I mean I guess they're not happy about me not talking to them like when I'll be back, where I'm going, what I'm going to do. But it's the same way with them. They never tell me stuff like that. I always find out in the end so I chose their tactic!

Posted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 2:35 am
by MAYO
Hello!! First, I want to ask you. Do you communicate with your person everyday?? If you communicate with them, they can understand you. If they don't understand, you complain many times. they will be amazed at by your eagerness.

Posted: Tue Sep 20, 2005 4:58 am
by peanuts
My parents got divorce more than ten years ago. Then I was two years ago, so my parents didn't give any responsible and trust in me. Nowadays I sometime feel sad :( , which I hardly feel so :P . Kathleen may feel sad and don't understand what to do. But I think you should do anything with all your strength!! :wink: Hang in there!! :D

Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 2:16 am
by eeerrrkkk
Hello!!!This is first time to write on you. I am my friendry mother. I go shopping with my mother.

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2005 2:29 am
by rinaman
well,I think you can tallk about your everyday affers
example,friends studies and more. And your parents trust you
because,they know what do you do everyday
But,I hope you are treasure for your parents so you can 
a little understand their mind :o