Let's learn together!

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Happy The Longest Night of The Year!

Post by behnam »

Hi,

Tonight is the longest night of the year on the Northern Hemisphere. Iranian people celebrate this night. They sit around and eat dried nuts and fruits. This night is called 'Yalda'. It is a girl name too. In Iran, you can find many women who are named 'Yalda'. Iranian Azerbaijanis call it Chilla Gejasi, which means the beginning of the first 40 days of winter. For further information please either go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yald%C4%81 or ask our expert Mohsen!


به صد یلدا الهی زنده باشی
انار و سیب و انگور خورده باشی
اگر یلدای دیگر من نباشم
تو باشی و تو باشی و تو باشی


Happy YALDA to all Iranian people in all over the world!

All the best,
Behnam, 21st December, 2013
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Happy Birthday Behnam! :)

Post by behnam »

Hi Behnam,

How are you? I hope you are fine. A little bird said that it is your birthday. This is just to say a warm 'Happy Birthday' to you.


Shab-e-Yalda kimin ballidi adim,
Aziz dustlar olmamisham sagham man.


I am as famous as Yalda night, my dear friends I am still alive!

Best wishes,
Your old friends:
Roya, Marina, Elham, Amal, Mohsen, Veronica, Kamelia, Setayesh, Andrew, Rosa, Maryam, Mitra, Adelaida, Zita, Asal, Nilufar, Nahid, Reyhaneh, Parvin, Roghayyeh, Fatemeh, and others!

Describing a pleasure is half of enjoying it! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


All the best,
Behnam, 21 December, 2013
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You Are Not the Same as Yesterday You Were

Post by Mohsen »

Once a year I get the chance
To wish you birthday cheer.
It pleases me no end to say,
I wish you another great year.
So happy birthday to you ,Behnam,
From the bottom of my heart.
And may your good times multiply,
Till they’re flying off the chart!


B.Wishes
Mohsen and his friends

Barry , Harry , Jerry , Larry , Mary , Perry , Terri
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Elham »

Hi dear Behnam,

You don't know how much I have missed you, you know nothing about how's going with your old friend, a girl who was used to be called a close and nice friend....

But you should know sth... and you know it for sure....


Happy Birthday,

Wish you all the best in the world,

Eli
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We Are Still Friends!

Post by behnam »

Hi Elham,

How are you? How is life in Najafabad? I hope everything is going well with you. Here, the weather is dangerously polluted. I suffer from this polluted weather. I feel some pain in my lungs when there are pollutants in the air. I am wearing a filter, but it doesn't help.

Thank you so much for your nice post which was, as always, full of feelings. I'd like to confess that we are still friends. Nothing can kill our pure human feelings to each other. We may make some conclusions or have some expectations in accordance with our assumptions, which are usually different from the facts, but we shouldn't let those things break the tree of unconditional friendship. This tree is holy since it reflects our past. We have to water it and protect it from damages.

Well, the philosophy of friendship may differ from person to person and from time to time, but what matters is the existence of a philosophy in friendship which gives us the excuse to either form a new friendship or keep the old one. I believe, as long as people have got a philosophy, no matter it is an extensive one or a limited one, they should follow it provided that the philosophy brings them some benefits, either spiritual or material. Oh, this subject is delicate. I may make you confused. Let's move on it! {-:

Posting in this thread, using my favourite colour in writing, may make you think that I am the same Behnam, with the same passion and full of enthusiasm, but you are one hundred percent wrong! I am not the same Behnam. White hairs on my cheeks and chin loudly say that Behnam is old. Not only does my body yell that its owner is old, but also my feelings say that leaving time is close to coming. Actually, I am writing to inform my friends that I am still alive. This comes from my loyalty to friendship and friends. Nothing else can keep me here!

We are still friends, either you want it or not!

All the best,
Behnam, 24 December, 2013
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Merry Christmas!

Post by behnam »

Hi,

I'd like to say
'Merry Christmas' to all my Christian friends. May Jesus Christ, Prophet of love & peace, bless us all on this day. Wishing Merry Christmas to those celebrating, especially Iranian Christians.

All the best,
Behnam, 25 December, 2013
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Answers!

Post by behnam »

Hi,

An old friend of mine has put off messages on my 'Yahoo Messenger' account and has asked two important questions. First of all, I'd like to thank this good friend for reading the posts carefully and paying attention to them closely.

The first question is about my philosophy of friendship. I've written that the philosophy of friendship may change with the times. That's normal. In addition to that, people can develop their philosophies. When a philosophy doesn't work in a particular situation, we have to either change it or change the situation. Determined people first try to change or review the situation. If they cannot change it, they wisely develop their philosophies to make them adapted to the situation.

The kinds of relationship between people can be different. Some people are our relatives. Some others are our colleagues. Some people are our friends. Some of them are special to us. Some are strangers, etc. Among friends, some of them are close friends. Some others are not that close. Like many quantitative parameters, friendship can be quantified by some numbers. For example, we can give number 100 to an ideal friendship, and number 0 to a neutral person in our lives. Definitely, our enemies will fall into minus side of this scale and will get negative numbers.

Ideal friendship isn't an absolute thing. People have different ideas about it. Its definition varies from person to person. Someone, in his/her frame of reference, may give 100 to his/her friendship with somebody, but this person(somebody:) ) may quantify the friendship with another number. Well, people have different frame of references, consequent results of different philosophies.


What is philosophy? The meaning of philosophy is 'the attitude or set of ideas that guides the behaviour of a person or organization'. We can change our ideas or modify them or make them more suitable for the situation we are in. In other words, we can change our frame of reference, our scale of measurement.

The second question was actually a comment on my view about the definition of love which has come in the post written to dear Amal. As I have written, love is only a feeling young people experience it when the nature makes them ready(fool them) to look for their Mr/Mrs right, to get married and start families. This is noun-negotiable. This is not optional. We don't choose this feeling. The nature gives it to us. By the way, knowing this fact should not make us disappointed, because it is something common among us. All I am saying is briefly that 'love is an instinctive feeling'. It is the trick of nature to fool us and cause us to marry and keep the generation going. Nature knows how to fool us. She is (has been)successful.

Another friend of mine has asked the meaning of "..my feeling says leaving time is close to coming...". The meaning is clear, but maybe it has been shocking. Well, when you have white hairs on your cheeks, chin, chest, ..., it means you are old. When you've got a broken heart, and you suffer from a heart operation, you feel that it is time to leave this earthy world. We will all leave this world, sooner or later. This is a fact. We shouldn't fool ourselves. Don't worry! Bad things never die! (بادنجان بم آفت نداره ) :lol: :lol: {-: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 26 December, 2013
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Mohsen »


Hi Behnam,
Hope you are fine, it is said that a person is young while he feels love,and you have time as long as you love.
You said that love is an instinctive feeling , I agree, but it is not like feeling thirst or hunger. Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. also love needs its conditions, the sexual desire would be crucial to create the love. Normally love creates between two opposite sex. What makes two opposite sex to be in love , the sexual desire is an instinctive feeling ,so it creates love. My reason is why love always creates between two opposite sexes.

The second point is the environment. For example a man who works with several girls in his work place ,he has working relations with her colleagues ,but there is more possible circumstances for his madness , beautiful gardens with scenic beauty providing an icing on the cake to the strong feeling of love and blossoming romance between a girl and a boy head over heels in love
The third point is the movies , people believe that their real world as what they watch in a movie, the stories which are shown on the celluloid about love to create a misconception intentionally or unintentionally that love is a beautiful experience and an inevitable part of our lives.

All the best
Mohsen
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Discussion!

Post by behnam »

Mohsen wrote:Normally love creates between two opposite sex. What makes two opposite sex to be in love , the sexual desire is an instinctive feeling ,so it creates love. My reason is why love always creates between two opposite sexes.


Hi Mohsen,

Many thanks for expressing your opinion about the topic. I totally agree with your first paragraph. If we dig deeper to see what creates love, we will immediately realise that two hormones are playing the main role. According to scientists, Testosterone and Oestrogen are responsible for the mail and female qualities respectively. How those substances work? That is mysterious. However, it is a proven fact that if you change the levels of those hormones in someone's body, their male or female qualities will change. For example, if the level of Testosterone goes up in a girl's body, she may have beard and mustache. For the same reason, Testosterone has caused me to get bald. :lol: {-: :lol:

Your second and third paragraph both are different from the first one. In the first paragraph you are explaining love, but in the rest of the post you are mentioning to two nice points which are quite different from the discussed topic. Those points are actually two possible answers to the potential question 'what triggers the love?' or 'What makes the love start?'

Talking about love is not easy, since it is one of the signs of God, as He Has said in the Holy Koran, Rome-22. However, from philosophy point of view, it is quite obvious that necessity creates love. Generally speaking, incompleteness creates needs, and needs create movements towards fulfillment. These are steps towards perfection!

Let me digress for a moment. Physics is really beautiful. Physics helps people think beautifully. If we want to understand the universe, we have to know Physics. If we want to be a good physicist we have to deeply understand cause and effect. Not only do we have to understand it, but also we have to love and respect this main principle of the universe. :lol: {-: :lol:

In order to get more, we have to analyse those two responsible hormones. How do they work? What are those hormones made from? When I was studying at university, I got interested in Physiology of Arthur Guyton. I read some chapters. It was(is) a useful book. However, nobody can answer to this question, "What causes the right opposite sexes(people who have the right amount of those hormones in their bodies) to attract each other?" This is mysterious and miraculous. To make people have an image about it I often say, "Suppose men and women are like empty egg cartons. They have mountains and valleys. The mountains go inside the valleys easily and they become stable. This is what we can see in the world of materials. Now, suppose such mountains and valleys exist in our spirits(in the spiritual world which is not deniable). Although they are invisible, the effect of them is sensible, and that is the attraction we feel and call it love."

Something crossed my mind a few seconds ago. As you may now, in terms of their behaviour in an external magnetic field, materials categorized into three groups. They are either Paramagnetic, or Diamagnetic, or Ferromagnetic. Paramagnetism is a form of magnetism whereby certain materials are attracted by an externally applied magnetic field. In contrast with this behavior, diamagnetic materials are repelled by magnetic fields. Ferromagnetism is the basic mechanism by which certain materials (such as iron) form permanent magnets, or are attracted to magnets. Now, suppose God has created(has put) an external magnetic filed in the universe. Philosophically speaking, we can consider necessity(incompleteness) as an external magnetic field. Now, consider one of the hormones( Testosterone or Oestrogen) to behave like Paramagnetic materials and the other one to behave like Diamagnetic objects. These materials may attract each other when they are exposed to an external field which we have already named them 'incompleteness'! Wonderful, fantastic! :lol: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 27 December, 2013
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by [amal] »

Hi Behnam,

How are you?

Thanks dear for writing that "explanation post" to me and other friends.. I was too worried about you and I even write an off but there was no answer!
Your words were verrrrry shocking! I couldn't sleep that night when I read them! YOU ARE OLD???!!!! And you are speaking about leaving time???!!! Oh my god!!! just some white hears on your chest let you feel so??!!!!!! What should my father say???!!! He is older than you and he had a heart operation, too. He is still working and ,by the way, his job is very hard and important! But he doesn't complain and he doesn't speak about leaving time!!!

Dear Behnam again I am sorry for being late in reply, I am not stone-hearted but my grandma is sick and we took her to the hospital. Above that, the electricity was off last two days... And NO, I didn't get married because these days there are a lot of males but there is no men! I will tell you the rest of that story when we chat inshallah..

Anyway, thanksss a lot for " The Smell Of Love!", I loved reading the both parts, I even read them many times... You are smart! "as usual" {-; I love your life philosophy...

In one of your posts, you were confused about what field of books you can write, so why don't you write about your life philosophy?! I am sure it would be a great book and it would take a big success in all over the world..

About "dowry"I didn't get your point too! :lol: Why should girls' families give money for the boys??!!! As you said it's insulting!
Then why do you always say "ask Mohsen"?! Well, I will ask Mohsen... but why don't you speak and explain to us about your traditions?! why do you always feel that you aren't a part of that society?! {-:

Dear Mohsen please explain to us the philosophy behind dowry action!!!!

Behnam, what I meant by dowry and what is happening here is that girls' families ask a high "مؤخر و مقدم" for their girls and that means that the boy here who should pay the money, they also ask for gold and a house too... The girls' families here pay nothing except the cost of the engagement party.

So what I was saying is: If the girls families just have a little sympathy with the boys and didn't ask for a high amount of money, spinsterhood matter would be solved!

Dear, I heard that in Iran the government force the girls to wear the hejab, is that right?! Why should they do that?! what is the point behind this action?!

Don't you think that they should give them the freedom to choose and decide what they want?! Another thing came to my mind, if god himself, when he put the rules, he put them and left the choice to us and let us choose between the bad and the good thing, therefore the government shouldn't force them!

When we are forced to do sth, it becomes like a habit or a costume not a religious matter! And it doesn't show if the person were a believer or not..

For example, here most of the women who hide their faces and cover them with black hejab are bad, they hide their action with this costume and try to deludes people that they are religious women..
Therefore, whenever someone ask me why don't I hide my face, I immediately say NO! And the bad idea about the women who wear it come to my mind!! They completely spoiled the meaning of it.

The same thing happened when when we force a bad girl to wear the hejab, it will give a bad idea for others about it -especially for non-Muslims..
For sure the next generation will hate the hejab just because of this irresponsible action.

Thanks for reading.

Best wishes,
Amal
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Thank you for giving me motivation!

Post by behnam »

Hi Amal,

So many thanks for your motivational post. It includes some nice points and some challenging questions.


[amal] wrote:Then why do you always say "ask Mohsen"?! Well, I will ask Mohsen... but why don't you speak and explain to us about your traditions?! why do you always feel that you aren't a part of that society?!
Obviously, each individual, in accordance with his/her skills, talents and interests, likes and dislikes, etc. is expert at some special and limited areas. Nobody can claim that s/he is expert in all areas. As far as I know, our friend Mohsen is an eagle-eyed person when it comes to social based issues. In addition, I'd like to motivate him to be more active, because I love reading his posts.
[amal] wrote:Dear, I heard that in Iran the government force the girls to wear the hejab, is that right?! Why should they do that?! what is the point behind this action?!
To be honest with you, I don't know whether the government or any other organization forces females to wear Hejab. My wife and all the ladies in my relatives wear Hejab, no matter if the government puts pressures on it or not. We are Muslim and we have been Muslim for years. I personally do believe in Hejab and this belief is not affected by the action of others. If all people in the world opposed the Islamic Hejab, I'd support it! I do mean what I am saying.

Let's assume that the government or some organizations put emphasize on wearing Hejab. I support them. We are living in an Islamic country, so we are supposed to follow the instructions of Islam. Thankfully, Hejab is clearly mentioned in the Holy Koran, so there is no rooms or excuses for misinterpretation.

In an Islamic society, women have to wear Hejab. If the don't cover their bodies, they threaten the mental health of the society. How? Well, men get excited by seeing sexual scenes while there is nowhere to satisfy their desires. In some countries sex industry is legal, so men welcome sexual excitement, because they easily can go to some legal places and do what they like by paying a little money. In an Islamic country, sex industry is illegal. For the sake of safety and health, Islamic rules about Hejab MUST be followed completely.

In my view, women who respect themselves and want me to respect them NEVER put her bodies on display. If they trigger my sexual desires without offering a solution for that, it will be like showing a glass of ice-water to a thirsty person in the summer and describing the quality of it! It is cruel. Even in forests, in wildlife animals do not do like that! If you are not going to give me a glass of water, at least don't remind my the water and its benefits. Don't make me more thirsty!
:lol: :lol: :lol:
[amal] wrote:The same thing happened when when we force a bad girl to wear the hejab, it will give a bad idea for others about it -especially for non-Muslims.
A bad girl may have some good tempting things! :lol: :lol: :lol: In this case, the philosophy of forcing her to cover her body is protecting others from danger, not that bad girl, although Hejab can be useful even for that bad girl too. :lol:

There are many social problems in the societies. Hejab is one of them. Sometimes, the authorities purposely close their eyes to important areas of life such as economy, corruption, health, unemployment, etc. and draw attention to some minor problems. This is not acceptable. An Islamic country MUST smell Islam in all areas.

I have to leave right now. I guess this topic is worth discussing more and deeper.

It was sad to hear that your grandmother is sick. I wish health to your grandmother. May Allah protect her from all illness.

All the best,
Behnam, 28 December, 2013
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Richard Feynman’s Letter to His Departed Wife: “You, Dead, A

Post by behnam »

October 17, 1946

D’Arline,

I adore you, sweetheart.

I know how much you like to hear that — but I don’t only write it because you like it — I write it because it makes me warm all over inside to write it to you.

It is such a terribly long time since I last wrote to you — almost two years but I know you’ll excuse me because you understand how I am, stubborn and realistic; and I thought there was no sense to writing.

But now I know my darling wife that it is right to do what I have delayed in doing, and that I have done so much in the past. I want to tell you I love you. I want to love you. I always will love you.

I find it hard to understand in my mind what it means to love you after you are dead — but I still want to comfort and take care of you — and I want you to love me and care for me. I want to have problems to discuss with you — I want to do little projects with you. I never thought until just now that we can do that. What should we do. We started to learn to make clothes together — or learn Chinese — or getting a movie projector. Can’t I do something now? No. I am alone without you and you were the “idea-woman” and general instigator of all our wild adventures.

When you were sick you worried because you could not give me something that you wanted to and thought I needed. You needn’t have worried. Just as I told you then there was no real need because I loved you in so many ways so much. And now it is clearly even more true — you can give me nothing now yet I love you so that you stand in my way of loving anyone else — but I want you to stand there. You, dead, are so much better than anyone else alive.

I know you will assure me that I am foolish and that you want me to have full happiness and don’t want to be in my way. I’ll bet you are surprised that I don’t even have a girlfriend (except you, sweetheart) after two years. But you can’t help it, darling, nor can I — I don’t understand it, for I have met many girls and very nice ones and I don’t want to remain alone — but in two or three meetings they all seem ashes. You only are left to me. You are real.

My darling wife, I do adore you.

I love my wife. My wife is dead.

Rich.

PS Please excuse my not mailing this — but I don’t know your new address.
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Richard Feynman’s Letter to His Departed Wife!

Post by behnam »

Hi friends,

Some people blame physicists for being cold and strict. In order to deny this false accusation, I am putting the letter of Richard Feynman to his dead wife! I leave the judgement to you.

In June 1945, the 27-year-old physicist Richard Feynman lost his wife, Arline Feynman, to tuberculosis. Only 25 years old, she was Richard’s high-school sweetheart. And yet she was much more. As Lawrence Krauss writes in 2012 biography on Feynman:


Richard and Arline were soul mates. They were not clones of each other, but symbiotic opposites – each completed the other. Arline admired Richard’s obvious scientific brilliance, and Richard clearly adored the fact that she loved and understood things he could barely appreciate at the time. But what they shared, most of all, was a love of life and a spirit of adventure.


October 17, 1946

D’Arline,

I adore you, sweetheart.

I know how much you like to hear that — but I don’t only write it because you like it — I write it because it makes me warm all over inside to write it to you.

It is such a terribly long time since I last wrote to you — almost two years but I know you’ll excuse me because you understand how I am, stubborn and realistic; and I thought there was no sense to writing.

But now I know my darling wife that it is right to do what I have delayed in doing, and that I have done so much in the past. I want to tell you I love you. I want to love you. I always will love you.

I find it hard to understand in my mind what it means to love you after you are dead — but I still want to comfort and take care of you — and I want you to love me and care for me. I want to have problems to discuss with you — I want to do little projects with you. I never thought until just now that we can do that. What should we do. We started to learn to make clothes together — or learn Chinese — or getting a movie projector. Can’t I do something now? No. I am alone without you and you were the “idea-woman” and general instigator of all our wild adventures.

When you were sick you worried because you could not give me something that you wanted to and thought I needed. You needn’t have worried. Just as I told you then there was no real need because I loved you in so many ways so much. And now it is clearly even more true — you can give me nothing now yet I love you so that you stand in my way of loving anyone else — but I want you to stand there. You, dead, are so much better than anyone else alive.

I know you will assure me that I am foolish and that you want me to have full happiness and don’t want to be in my way. I’ll bet you are surprised that I don’t even have a girlfriend (except you, sweetheart) after two years. But you can’t help it, darling, nor can I — I don’t understand it, for I have met many girls and very nice ones and I don’t want to remain alone — but in two or three meetings they all seem ashes. You only are left to me. You are real.

My darling wife, I do adore you.

I love my wife. My wife is dead.

Rich.

PS Please excuse my not mailing this — but I don’t know your new address.


*****************************************************************



}: }: }: }: }: }: }: }: }: }:

This can be called love!

All the best,
Behnam, 30 December, 2013
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Why not?

Post by Elham »

Why not?

I feel like writing. Why not? I used to write in this thread and although for some good reasons I stopped it, today again I feel like writing here. Part of me is in Let's learn together. Part of true me is in here and I can decide weather or not to write in it.

There are some thoughts in my mind right now. One of them is a question I'm asking myself :" How can we have opinions about things? " What makes us an opinionated person?"

Last night I watched " Casabelanca" . As I've heard it's a very famous movie.
What makes a film famous? I watched it, but if you ask me to give my opinion about it, I really don't know what to say. I just can say, it was good. I liked some of the features of the main character of the film. He was somehow serious and strict but full of emotion. I liked his personality as a "MAN"! I don't know what words I can use to describe him as a MAN but I just know he was attractive as a man.
But if you ask me about the story, I don't know how to talk about. So I wonder how I should be able to discuss sth?

I read a book today. I had heard about it. It's " kafe piano" ! after reading it , now, I wonder how I should judge it?

I think it needs experience.You should have read many books and watched too much movies and know many things to be able to have opinions about sth.

Anyway, right now I'm lack of enough information and experience to discuss things.


Dear Behnam has written about love. I think I'm familiar with love. I don't care what love is for in reality, or why god has created it, to make men and women make love and have babies or other things.
I just like to like it. Love is beautiful and makes life worth to live. I like love for itself and I'd like to believe love exists just for the sake of love. For those great feelings we have while we're in love. For the beauty and sweetness it adds to our lives. For the wonderful moments it creates between two persons. For sure love is a creator, a great creator.What dose it create? The good feelings that love brings with itself, the peace that it gives to our moments, the wonderful smell it spreads all over our life, most importantly the beauty of a great connection that loves makes between two heart, two soul and two body is a magic.

I love love and ask for more and more of it. Love is essence of life. I love to breath it. :-)
Nothing is comparable with liking some one deeply. No feeling is comparable with it when you some where deep down feel " you love some one" ! It warms your heart , soul and body and you don't want to change it with anything else in the world.

A baby can be the fruit of a beautiful love but I don't believe it's the reason for it. It may just be an ideal but I don't care. :-D


......
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Happy New Year!

Post by behnam »

Hi friends,

I'd like to say '
Happy New Year' to those use Gregorian calendar. I hope 2014 will bring more happiness, peace, health, and prosperity. I also hope you will make some good New Year Resolutions and will STICK to them! I wish you good luck and lasting happiness.

All the best,
Behnam, 31 December, 2013
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Mohsen »



Dear Amal,

I hope you and your family are in health

In fact the burden of explaining about dowry fell to me , well , I do it

First it is better to know what the dowry is, or what we speak about it as a dowry. We have two kinds of dowries, the dowry which is given to bride by bride groom' family and the dowry which is taken to bride groom house by bride's family.
The dowry which is on boy'charge is called Mehr ( mehrieh),it is written officially in a document as a marriage contract. That is included the following items

1-A copy of holy book ( Quran) ,
2- traditionally the amount of prophet 'daughter ( Hazarat Fatima) ,the dowry which Imam Ali (AS) gave to her wife ,as a blessing is inserted in this document.
3- A special Mirror
4- Gold , a set ( necklace ,bracelet ,earrings )
5- Pilgrimage to Mecca
6- The ownership of a house or a part of a house should be officially given to girl.

All of the articles in this document are negotiable and before the wedding ceremony , both families come to the agreement in amicably atmosphere.

It is better to know that in Iran marriage has two steps , first the girl and boy officially are registered as a wife and husband , in this step the the amount of dowry which is undertaken by boy fixed ,and it is written on a paper as a document ,the close relatives sign the document as witnesses . In this step relatives and friends from both families gather in big saloon and received by fruits , ice-cream, drinks , confectioneries , and special marriage contract cake.
Before the ceremony starts , the bride was taken to hairdresser salon and the bride groom decorate his car with flowers and pick up the bride from hairdresser salon and comes to the party .
During the ceremony bride and bride groom sit in special place and a clergy man invites the couple to declare their consent by addressing them some special words and sentences. After the bride answers positively , they are called wife and husband. Then the couple divided the cake ,the cake distributed among the people in saloon.

The dowry which is given by bride's family is called Tocher. The apparatuses and furniture which are taken by the bride to her husband's house is called "Tocher". This word is taken from Arabic word "jahaz" or "jahiziyeh"
The preparing bride's tocher is one of the most important things. Here under we are going to make a list of things that usually includes in the bride's tocher.
1) Bride and groom's bedroom furniture: It includes double bed, end tables, commode, dresser, bed sheets and pillow clothes. Some extra bedclothes, bed sheets and pillow covers for guest. Some bedclothes, bed sheets, and pillow covers for guest.
2) Proper curtains for each window for example: curtain for kitchen, bedrooms and living room.
3) Living room furniture, dinner table and chairs.
4) Carpet
5) Vacuum
6) Decorative things such as pictures, drawings and different statuettes.
7) Clock or horologe.
8) Library
9) Refrigerator (Refrigerator)
10) One set of chinaware and porelain dishes or plates
11) Washing machine
12) Gas burner (over)
13) One set of autoclave, stew pan and pan.
14) Crystal dishes for different purposes. Utensil and kitchenware.
15) Few sets of glasses
16) Tableware.
17) Samovar, and teapot. Plus a teaset
18) Set of spoon and fork
19) Sets of Fork and knife plus dessert plates.
20) Knife, colander and ladle
21) Water bottle, flask, cruse and glassware
22) Boxes of castor or condiment and spice boxes place for the tea, sugar, and sugar loaf 23) Kitchen apron and towels
24) Fridge Special utensils
25) Boskets and plastic dustbins in different sizes
26) Trencher and special boards for cutting meat and green vegetables
27) Electrical mill 28) Preparing boxes of legume, cereal, rice, spices, tea and sugar.
29) Rope for hanging cloths and clothespin.
30) Workbag, some colorful bobbins needle and scissors.
31) Separate towels for bride and groom
32) Necessary things for bath and washroom.
33) Few nightgowns and pajama plus various underwears for the bride
34) Towels 35) Iron and its cover
36) Crystal vases in different sizes.

The tocher is a conventional custom among the people , it is not obligatory , so the value of different ,it is cost from 10000$ to 1000000$ , it depends on the financial ability of girls family.
As I told you in Iran marriage has two steps , I explained about the first step , After the couple were called wife and husband , they don't live together until the second ceremony. It may takes between 3 months to 2 years. When the bride groom buys or rent his house , the bride's family send a person to that house to measure the doors and windows for curtain , the bride choose her curtain and they will be installed behind the doors and windows. Then a date is fixed for bringing all of tocher to the bride groom 's house.
Another wedding party will be hold and people invited for dinner . After finishing the party Bride and bride groom goes to their new house by riding their decorated car , and their family and relatives and friends follow them in their car , the make a lot of noise in the streets by horns of their car and finally throw the new couple in their new house to have the first night of life together.

It is a long story , it is 12.45 and I should go to bed , if you didn't get the story ,please feel free to ask me any detail
All the best
Mohsen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Mohsen »

Good night Elham,

Welcome my friend , I don't know why you left us ,but I am happy to see your post.

Wish you the best
Mohsen
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Hi, dear Behnam,Amal and Elham

Post by shahrubanu »

I feel your great friendship in my heart deeply.I really like your friendship.Please forgive me I couldn t write here for a long time,because I m very busy.As you know,I have started to teach in a private school,working in here makes me very tired.I don t know what I m going to do }: I don t want to work in here anymore ,but I have to need regular salary.I haven t got time to read books,watch films or sign to internet.In brief, I have no time for my personal life.
I want to teach in a puplic school soon otherwise I will be a person who is out of life
I always need your friendships, I love your friendship.You create a beautiful place in my life..
All you are very precious for me ,please always hold this fact in your mind..
I wish all your dreams come true soon in this new year.I wish Allah always protects you..

Great love to my friends..


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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by arman »

Hello! I have been away for long time and I would admit that I miss this forum. Anyway, I see this thread earlier and caught my attention. I like all posted discussion here. I read all threads here. It seems that all who posted here know each other well. Happy new year to all!
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Welcome Elham!

Post by behnam »

Hi Elham,

It was very nice reading your post. Thank you very much for sharing your opinion with us. I appreciate it. There is no doubt that this thread is your home, and you have got a sense of belonging. You are most welcome!

My first post in 2014 is addressed to you. I hope we will write to each other regularly.

Hope to here from you soon.

All the best,
Behnam, 2 January, 2014
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Hi Shahrbanu!

Post by behnam »

Hi Sharbanu,

It is always nice reading your posts. You are a great friend and a kind sister. I do love your kindness and care. Thank you very much for reading and posting. Thank you once again for your positive words. I am proud of you.

Happy New Year to you and to your family! I wish you lasting happiness and success. I hope 2014 will bring happiness and prosperity to all people, specially to you.

I hope to read more from you.

All the best,
Behnam, 2 January, 2014
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Hi Arman!

Post by behnam »

Hi Arman,

Welcome to this thread and thank you so much for reading the posts and putting comments. Thank you once again for joining us. I hope we will help each other with practicing English through writing. Please do not hesitate to write in this thread. I am sure, my friends and I will welcome your posts with open arms. Please participate in discussion.

I hope to hear more from you.

All the best,
Behnam, 2 January, 2014
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Mohsen »

Dear friends,

The Islamic calendar is reckoned from the time of migration (Hijra) of Prophet Mohammad (Peace Be Upon Him) from Mecca to Madina. At the first night of Rabi al-Awwal, twelve years after the outset of his Divine Mission, the Holy Prophet migrated from Makkah to al-Madenah, This was considered as the starting point for Islamic year ,but it was changed to month of Moharam. Some people believe that this changing was happened at the time Ammar Khatab , and some people say that it was changed at the time of Bani Omaieh era .
I would like to congratulate my Muslim friends for coming of Rabi al-Awwal, I should say happy new year to people who use Islamic calendar.

All the best,
Mohsen
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Elham Speaks Beautifully!

Post by behnam »

Hi friends,

Last night I had an online English class with an American teacher on Skype. Actually, the accent of teacher was American, I am not sure about his nationality. He says he lives in America. Anyway, forget where he is from, that's not a big deal. At class time, I was chatting with Elham. I asked her to take part in the class and she kindly agreed.

It was great to be with Elham in a class. I really enjoyed it. Elham speaks English fluently, nicely, and beautifully. She has got a very beautiful accent. Her accent was better than the teacher's accent, that's to say, she speaks English like native speakers. To be honest, I felt jealous of her English! Elham was impressive, that is why I am impressed with her way of speaking English, and that is why I am writing these things(I might not write! {-: :lol: {-: ). I hope she will help me with speaking English.

My accent is not good. It is a bad mixture of Azerbaijani, Farsi, and British English! Sometimes, I record my voice and play it. I hate listening to my own voice. I speak like a robot. My voice isn't soft! What should I do? }: }: }: }: }:

All the best,
Behnam, 5 January, 2014
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Moroo »

Hi Elham

How are you, how is life treating you.

I like your last post so much specially world " LOVE ", love is everything in the world, who can live without love, without love we are robots.

Best of LOVE.
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Moroo »

Dear, Behnam and Amal

How are you Amal and how is beautiful Syria,

Sorry I stopped watching the news because as people we play a role in a story someone else put the scenario.

I read your post which you were talking about hejab as well as Behnam's reply.

I'm Muslim but I believe that hejab is NOT obligatory :!!:

Most of Muslims caring about how they and their families look ( hejab, beard, Jilbab,…etc) but they don't even think about the most important thinks which is inside not outside.

I learned from the countries who forced the people to do something that it makes the opposite result.

Sorry for my short posts because it's a little bit hard for me to write long sentences.

Happy new year to all my friends
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Elham »

Dear Behnam,

That's very kind of you to write those compliments on my speaking. You've exaggerated about it. {-;

You know, I even don't remember when I had last spoken English. It was a long time I hadn't spoken. I was stressed If I can speak, but luckily I could put some words together and make some meaningful sentences. :lol:

My accent is good, I like it myself , but my knowledge of English is poor, good accent is worth nothing without being able to talk!

Your English is great. You can easily express yourself, your knowledge of English is really great.To be honest I'm jealous of your English.Your accent is not bad at all! It's not perfect but it's not bad.

And as we both know, what matters is English itself not accent. The first important thing while evaluating some one's English is his ability to makes right sentences and get his message across. Accent comes next. So we come into this conclusion that you are the winner {-;

By the way, I'd be so glad if we could come to a deal, what? To combine your great knowledge of English and my accent and make sth PERFECT. Deal?

All the best
Eli
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Let's judge after carefully considering the facts!

Post by behnam »

Moroo wrote:I learned from the countries who forced the people to do something that it makes the opposite result.
Hi Moroo,

It is nice hearing from you. Thank you very much for following us.

I wish you had written clearly which countries force people to wear Hejab, and what is meant by 'opposite result'.

Moroo wrote:Most of Muslims caring about how they and their families look ( hejab, beard, Jilbab,…etc) but they don't even think about the most important thinks which is inside not outside.
What is that important thing inside? :lol: :lol: :lol:

Fortunately, Hejab is clearly stated in the holy Koran; [نور/31], [احزاب/59], [نور/30], [احزاب/53].
What people do or believe cannot change the opinion of God about something. When it comes to making decision about important matters, God isn't democratic. He doesn't care about the nature or the habit of people. If all people in the world get naked and support nudism God will not change His opinion about Hejab!

I respect your views and other friends' views, but we have to take everything into consideration before making our judgement. We have to carefully consider the facts. For example, we have to think about these questions: 1) What has caused some people to get interested in gay marriage? 2) Where is the origin of HIV and what makes it epidemic in the world? 3) What destroys or threatens the foundation of families in all nations? 4) We(men and women) are human beings, why do women have a tendency to put their bodies on display? 5) Who makes decision about the amount of body someone can put on show? 6) What are the negative and the positive sides of nudism?

I hope to hear from you soon.

All the best,
Behnam, 5 January, 2014
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I do agree with your suggestion!

Post by behnam »

Elham wrote:I'd be so glad if we could come to a deal, what? To combine your great knowledge of English and my accent and make sth PERFECT. Deal?
Hi Elham,

Many thanks for being complimentary about my English knowledge. That's very kind of you to say good things about my English. I welcome your suggestion with open arms. That's very generous of you to offer the deal I am looking for. Thank you very much indeed.

I am very much interested in making the deal you have announced. I am ready to sign it if you are serious. This is a golden opportunity for me, and I know such opportunities seldom knock the door twice. :lol: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 5 January, 2014
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by [amal] »

Hi dear Elham,

How are you?

Happy to see you here and happy to read your words... It has been a long time since we chatted together, I really miss you and miss our old relationship.. I don't know what happened but I know that we still care and love each other!
I even don't know if you wrote some off msgs to me but if you did, I got nothing! :-x :-(

Dear, today, I feel that I want to write something to you, I don't care about what I going to write or if it was connected to each other or to the subjects which you wrote or not, I will just write what comes to my mind, so forgive me it you get nothing. :lol:

First of all, let me tell you about my days and my life. The electricity was off for days, it's like heaven here, right?! :-|

I feel that I am not alive! I feel that there is nothing interesting in this world so I just sleep, I don't want to wake up to do nothing!!!! What a waste of time! :-(

I agree with your idea about LOVE. I especially liked this sentence "Love is beautiful and makes life worth to live".

in fact love is something great and it's a mercy from god, it shows the best in people. But, sadly, Human beings spoiled it and changed its meaning and started to foolish each other under the name of "love"!

Emm, I still believe that there is pure love which isn't just for having babies or to make men and women have s.. No, but just some pure feelings and emotions..

However, it need two pure lovable hearts not like love these days when someone loves too much and the other loves too little.

About giving our opinion or judge about things, I think that people judge about sth from there point of view or what they are interested in and it doesn't matter if they are experts or not..

Above that, we should consider the aim behind watching a movie or reading a book..
For example, someone would watch a movie to have fun so they can judge if the movie was funny or not. Meanwhile, another person is watching it to have romance feelings so they judge it if it was romantic, and so on..

Last week while chatting with some friends, they recommended an

historical series to me and said that it is a very good one. However, I told them that I am not interested in historical series so I wont watch such thing no matter how much people say that it was good..

In other words and to make my words clear, that judgment isn't an absolute thing, it's change from person to person according to their culture and interests...

Oh Dear, I read your and Behnam's posts', I really envy you! I wish I could be with you! Although neither my accent is good nor my English! :-( BUT! Hearing your voice and chatting with you both!! Ohhh my god!!!! It would be the best thing ever happen to me!

I hope to read from you soon.

Best wishes,
Amal
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by [amal] »

Hi Shahrubanu,

How are you?

Happy new year to you. Sorry for being late in reply, please forgive me!
I really love your friendship too and hope to read more from you, you don't believe how much hearing your voice and chatting with you on Skype made me happy!

Dear, I had the same experience as you with the private school, it really takes the person's time and life. It takes you from the people you love.. Sadly, this is life and we should tolerate it. Wish you the best with your work and inshallah you will get the job you wish one soon...

Thanks for your post.

Best wishes,
Amal
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by [amal] »

Hi Mohsen, Moroo and Behnam,

How are you?

Thanks a lot for your posts, I really enjoyed reading them. I promise you to write a reply sooooooooooon inshallah.

Wish you the best,
Amal
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by mortaza »

Hello my dear friends,

How are you?! It's me! Mortaza! I have not written here for a long time; for one year maybe! But I follow the posts. Every month or so I take a look at the thread. I'm sorry I couldn't be active.

To be honest, I am still afraid of not being able to continue regularly. I will try to write regularly.

Best regrads,
Mortaza
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I am going to do a PhD!

Post by behnam »

Hi friends,

How are you? I hope you are all well.

Amal: It was very nice reading your posts and hearing about you. I am waiting to read more.

Morteza: Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, you made me really happy. Thank you very much for keeping the contact.

To all friends: Finally, by the grace of God, I got accepted to start a PhD in a city in Azerbaijan province. I love that city, the people, the friendly atmosphere of the university, and above all my subject; Photonics. By God's grace, I am going to overcome all possible difficulties and make a splash in the university.

Tomorrow, I am going to offer my official documents and degree certificates and perform registration procedures. Please pray for me and wish me luck.

All the best,
Behnam, 12 January, 2014
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by mortaza »

Dear Behnam,

I'm very glad that you are accepted in a Ph.D. program; especially the one that you love! I don't know what Photoncis is, but I can guess it is something about light!! (Am I right?)

I think, for Ph.D. students and researchers to be successful, it is very important not to have issues that cause distraction to them. For example, if one needs to work for hours to make money to resolve his financial problems, then he may have some difficulties to finish his scientific project. To me, teaching is an issue! I need (and have to) teach at least 20 hours a week. This sometimes prevent me to focus on the subject I am researching on.

I know that you will not have any of these issues during your studies, and if you would face a problem, you would overcome it (as you wrote above).

Best regards,
Mortaza
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He was the leader of a nation who want to follow his legacy

Post by Mohsen »

Apologists will whitewash the blood Ariel Sharon spilled,but I am not {-;

The murderer of thousands innocent civilian people Arial Sharon went into hell , and bring happiness to millions of hearts. But it is really shameful that the head of governments sent messages and expressed their condolences to his family and Israel.

What they want to tell the people of the world, what is hidden in these messages, they want to say that a person who kill thousands of innocent people is a warrior, a messenger of peace, because he has guaranteed our benefits and the human rights should be suffocated in the situations which support our benefit

The head of governments who expressed condolences, exposing their complicity in the crimes of this ~ mass murderer. Supporting Sharon to did his criminal for many years.

Despite of this, what a piece of filth he was that no heads of state dared to attend his funeral.. though there will be a rogues gallery of ex-heads of state,chief amongst them yet to be charged war criminal Tony Blair
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by mortaza »

Dear Mohsen,

How are you my friend? It is a very long time since our last communication! I really miss you.

The story of Palestine and the creation of Israel is very sad. If I am not mistaken, year 1947 is called Nakba by the Arabs. That was the year when Israel came to the existence. I have seen a lot of documentaries related to the history of Palestinian-Israeli conflict. In one movie, particularly, there was an old Jewish woman that claimed the land of Israel (Palestine) is given by God to Jewish. She also argued that because this holy land is originally owned by Jewish, there is no surprise why Arabs have not been successful in making a state on it! She lives in her home made on a high hill. When the reporter asked her why she lives there, she replied controlling high areas makes give them more power to dominate the whole land!

I have no idea how to resolve this problem! I can just hope that one day all Palestinians come back to their home and live with peace.

Best regards,
Mortaza
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Congratulations

Post by Elham »

Dear Behnam,

I got so happy for you being accepted in PhD exam. :-D :-D :-D
Congratulations on your great success.

Wish you a successful and wonderful future ahead,

Eli
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by [amal] »

Hi Mohsen,

How are you? How are your days?

Thanks for your valuable post, it's really interesting and I've understood the matter clearly!

In fact, there are some common things between our tradition and yours. However, what caught my eyes the most is the "pilgrimage to Mecca"!

I wish our Mehr included it, if my husband took me to Mecca, I would never ask him for anything else! :roll: :-D

Dear, I didn't understand this part: "6- The ownership of a house or a part of a house should be officially given to girl."
But why he would give her a house??! And isn't it too expensive? What if the boy himself didn't have a house? Or in other words, he can't afford it?!

What I had understood from Behnam's post that the boys' families give nothing to the girls or only girls' families should give boys dowry to marry their girls! But now I have understood the matter clearly.. I have get that their are two parts and both should give sth.

Above that, if the girls will take a house, it's normal to pay some money for the furniture! isn't it?! :lol: "Just kidding"

In the past and even in other different parts of Syria till now, we have the same customs like you. We have Mehr and Jehas.

But here in Damascus, girls take "Jehas" to their new houses too but not all the item which you recommended in your post, just some clothes and the necessary things for themselves. Emm, meanwhile, all furnitures and kitchen things, the boys' family should bring them..

In my idea, marriage is really something important because it gather two strange families together which have different manners. And the most important thing more than money and material things is to have an agreement between them and between the girl and the boy...

Thanks for reading.

Wish you the best,
Amal
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Confusion!

Post by behnam »

Hi friends,

How are you? How is your life? I hope you are all fine and enjoying your life.

How can we enjoy our life? This is a very important question, although it sounds like a philosophical one. If we focus on ourselves to know who we are(to know ourselves well), then we will know what to follow in order to enjoy our lives! How to know ourselves? This is extremely difficult! The majority of us don't know ourselves! We are doing some activities, yes, of course, but those activities are done automatically. We eat, drink, sleep, etc. These activities are all relevant to our nature. A stupid person may eat or drink more than a genus one! In other words, knowledge of ourselves is different from our natural instinctive actions or reactions.

People are different. They have different attitudes towards life. They do different activities to enjoy their lives. This is a fact!

To Mortaza: Thank you very much for your post. I wish you success in both teaching and doing the researches. I agree with you. In many cases in life, we have to follow the limitations. We have to obey some rules, although they may seem ridiculous. We are born with some basic needs that we cannot get rid of them. For example, we have to eat something, no matter we are a God's messenger, or a very famous scientist, or an ordinary person. We have to earn money, because fulfilling those basic needs cannot be performed without money! Nothing is wrong with working! However, some of us are obligated to work and work and work! We are forced to work all days in order to fulfill our needs! This is disgusting! I hate it! We have to be given enough time to do something for relaxation and fulfillment of our spirits' needs! However, unfortunately, we are forced to ignore these important features of our lives!

To Elham: Thank you very much for your friendly message. It touched my heart! Please write more. I love reading your posts.

To Amal:
[amal] wrote:What I had understood from Behnam's post that the boys' families give nothing to the girls or only girls' families should give boys dowry to marry their girls! But now I have understood the matter clearly.. I have get that their are two parts and both should give sth.

What you had understood from my post that boys families give nothing to girls' families, but girls' families give dowries to boys is, fortunately or unfortunately, true! On the other hand, what you have understood from dear Mohsen's post, despite the fact that he had written a wonderful post about dowry, is wrong! :lol: {-: :lol:

I am sure, my dear friend Mohsen will explain 'عندالمطالبة' and 'عند الاستطاعة' to you clearly. I guess you are confused! {-: :lol: {-:

All the best,
Behnam, 16 January, 2014
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Amal and Elham

Post by mortaza »

Dear Elham and Amal

How are you my friends? I hope everything is alright. I believe we have already had some conversations to each other. Since I have not written here for a long time, I think it is more convenient if I quickly introduce myself to help you remind of me!!!

My name is Mortaza (of course) and I am teaching math in a university as a full-time professor. I love my job (teaching math) although the students, these days, are not very much interested in hard studying and learning math. I have just marked their final exam, and the majority of them are under 10 (of 20). So I have to, somehow, normalize the scores so that an acceptable portion of the class pass the course!!! Do you know what I mean?!

Anyway, I'm married, I have two children (my son 9, and my daughter 5), and I don't know what else I should say!

I am looking forward to hear form you.

Best regards,
Mortaza
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Mohsen »


Dear Mortaza,

Long time no see ,I miss you too ,of course priorities are your family and jobs, but no one can say that I have no time to write some sentences.

My idea is that the motivation and environment are the most important factors for practising a job. The motivation is a clear known fact for us ,but the environment have different interpretation. My idea is that a good environment is when our mind doesn't deal with too many thoughts especially useless ones.

Sometimes the unusual behaviours of people who are surrounded us such as parents ,wife, neighbours, colleagues is tormenter and make the environment such intolerable that it effects on us to lose our motivation for having positive activities and development.
Sometime we make our life too busy that our mind have no rest ,for example , I get used to buy shares of some companies , banks and as a shareholder I should check the stock exchange hall website every day to check the prices (http://www.tsetmc.com), it takes my time and also make my mind busy in a way that I can't focus on anything else. I often go to the hall for selling or buy my shares , of course I am not a professional stockholder, but generally I got a good benefits from this job. I don't like this kind of incomes, It is like gambling , and it annoys me because I believe that benefit should be earned by doing a job.But I content myself to compare this job with some people who exchange the currency and get their benefit.

There many things around us which distract us from our main work and cause to stop concentration on our improvement.

About the Israel, The hypothesis that the lands of Palestine was originally Jewish' properties and now they have renewed their acquisition by killing many people and making war on this land for many years is a wrong theory.

Since the countries had been formed thousands years ago and kings of different dynasties dominated their lands, the map of countries each countries changed many times ,sometimes they occupied a land and sometimes lost. For example if we review the Iran history ,even in 500 years ago our country was very larger than now , many areas such as Tajikistan , Afghanistan , Bahrain and …so on were parts of Iran, if we go back to old ancient history like Jewish people , The vast areas in Asia were belong to Iran. Can we claim for any parts of lost lands and start war and occupy them. Surly the answer is negative, because the world has its law and countries have their maps, so any movement which is out of law is called out law. But what we can do when the law is interpreted as a benefit of some powerful countries and the law is only their gun, what they say is "military option is on the table"

B.Regards,
Mohsen
Last edited by Mohsen on Fri Jan 17, 2014 7:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Mohsen »

I am sure, my dear friend Mohsen will explain 'عندالمطالبة' and 'عند الاستطاعة' to you clearly. I guess you are confused!
My dear Behnam,
In fact I signed my wedding contract unaware of legal points of view, I should find it and read it again also I should read more about 'عندالمطالبة' and 'عند الاستطاعة'

Dear Amal ,thank you for your post , I give you more detail about your questions a.s.a.p
Behnam called me an experienced man so .. it makes a lot of force of me to write more :lol:

All the best
Mohsen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by mortaza »

Dear Mohsen,

First of all, let me thank you for your beautiful posts. You write fluently and I enjoy reading your writings very much.

It's 9:30 pm, and it's time for my children to go to bed and sleep. Usually, my wife take cares of children' bed time; she makes them brush their teeth and do whatever is needed before sleep. Then, she tells them a story so that they fall in sleep. Sometimes she simply reads from a book, but most of the times she tells them an improvised story! Anyway, it is now a good time for me to seat on the chair behind my desk, and start writing!

We have particular situations in Iran. The economic situation is the most important and effective one, I think. People are often, if not always, busy with thinking and planning about their financial issues. So, they don't have enough time for their hubbies. As a result, the life in Iran is not as enjoyable as it should be. I am one of these people. Forgive me if I cannot regularly come to this thread and write.

Since we have severe economic inflation and depression, especially in recent years, it is probable that your savings shrink to half in one or two years! So it is natural if everyone invests his money in something. Some people, as you said, invest their money in gold, some in currency, and some in real estate!

You said that you buy and sell shares. Well, it is a tricky and difficult job. To be honest, I do not have the gut to walk in the stock market. I think I would lose all my money by making a wrong deal! You said that you generally get benefits from this job. This means, my friend, that you are a professional. If I have enough money, I prefer to buy a real estate. It is also profitable, you know. However, you should know where and when buy one.

Finally, about Israel and Palestine, you are absolutely right. The world in the current century is very different from that in, for example, 200 years ago. The time for getting land and making power by using force and killing people is over now. However, there is something peculiar about Israel and Palestine. Palestine was not attacked by a foreign country. At first, some people (Jewish) immigrated to this land, and after getting organized, they attacked Palestinian from inside!

Let me finish it here. Thank you for reading.

Best regards,
Mortaza
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by [amal] »

Hi Behnam,

How are you?

Stop being naughty dear! :lol: :lol: I'd understood both posts and I know that those items which Mohsen mentioned were asked just if the person could afford them.. "عند الاستطاعة"
And it isn't sth strict like a law or sth.. Since, you are living in a rent house. {-;

Dear, Marriage's customs are almost the same in our countries.. I was just asking to make this thread active and to share a topic to discuss. {-; :-D

Wish you the best,
Amal
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by [amal] »

Hi Mortaza,

How are you and how is your family?

Welcome back dear! My friend, there is no need to introduce yourself to us again since we have never forgotten you, in fact, I have never forgotten any person who had written in this thread.. They are all in my heart. This place is a very important place to me, no matter where life takes me, I must come here and check it.. It really relax me and give me an inner peace..

Dear, these days students don't care about studying; internet, games and Face Book take their minds... I think teachers should create new attractive ways to teach them and get their attention, am I right?!

Hope to read more from you.

Best wishes,
Amal
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by [amal] »

Hi Moroo and Behnam,

How are you?

Dear Moroo, thanks for your post and your opinion, I am sure that you get what I meant since we are Arab and understand each other. {-; :lol:

What I meant is that Hejab is an obligatory thing from god and as Behnam said there is an Aya about it in Koran. Well, that is right... However, what I was saying is that Hejab is something between the person and god. when people want to do sth or not, they should do it because they are afraid of god not because they are afraid of their government! :roll:

Dear Behnam, took the discus to a new point and said that they threaten the mental health of the society therefore the government put that rule. Well, it's a nice and new way of thinking, it may help the good men a little from bad women's effect but it wont effect on bad man and also Hejab wont prevent bad women from doing their jobs. {-: :lol:

Above that, I can't say that all women who don't wear Hejab are bad! As you said what's important is the inside not the outside! What I care about when I am dealing with them is their manners toward me, I don't care if they wear hejab or not because it's god's job to judge them not me.

Dear Behnam, there are a lot of countries which forced their people to do something like Saudi Arabia..
You can't believe how bad most of their people are when they go out of their country, although Hejab is mandatory there, however, whenever they go out Saudia, they remove it!

Above that, if they keep the Hejab, their eyes are always full of make up, which give them more attractive look!!!!! Isn't that forbidden??!!! Isn't that threaten the society??!!
Some women even leave some tufts of hair without cover!!! Hejab in this way become a costume not a religious matter!

My point is, no matter how much the governments put rules, they can't prevent bad people from doing their jobs. They always can create ways to break the rules.

Thanks for reading.

Wish you the best,
Amal
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by Elham »

Hi Mortaza,

How can I forget you? You're the one who friendly wrote to me in the first Let's learn together....
oh, first Let's learn together... :cry: :cry: :cry:

Sorry, I got emotional again...hahaha... my ridiculous emotions...

Thanks for mentioning me in your post and saying hello. We are friends in Facebook and I see your nice pictures with your students. You seem to be a very kind and responsible professor... :-D

Yes, sadly such hardworking students like Behnam and you are found seldom these days... We mostly want to pass a course and get a degree... oh, how lazy we are...

You teach math, good for you. Being involved in math is enjoyable, I've missed it. If at my death time some one asks me list the things you really enjoyed in life and are happy having spent time on, certainly one of them would be MATH! Oh how sweet this math is. Although I may not continue my studies, I'm always happy with my decision on choosing math as my major in high school. and then engineering in university. Although I wasn't a successful student in univ( :cry: :cry: :cry: ) , I enjoyed spending more time with math , oh this sweet lovely lesson...

Wish you success and hope you enjoy your life fully,
Eli
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Re: Let's learn together!

Post by mortaza »

Dear Amal and Elham,

Thank you very much my friends for your warm posts to me. You two are very kind and friendly.

In Iran, going to university is the most desirable option among students who finish their high school. There are lots of universities in Iran, and it does not seem very hard to get accepted in some university. In fact, there are universities that enroll students without any entrance examination. They are, of course, nonprofit organizations and the students should pay fees. At this situation, it is natural if most of these universities suffer from a low quality in education.

Unfortunately, for a typical Iranian family, in which there is a high school student, it is very important that their child does not give up his studies after finishing high school and goes to university. If the student, himself, is determined to do that, it's fine; hopefully, by hard working etc., he will be accepted in a good university, and, since he knows what he wants, he will be successful in his career.

However, in many cases, the student is not interested in studying at all. He just doesn't like to displease his parents. In this case, being a student in a university for some years (taken, perhaps, from the golden period of his life) is nothing but a waist of time and money.

How this unwanted situation could be resolved? Well, in my opinion, first people's attitude should be adjusted. At the same time, the government and other responsible organizations should create opportunities for youths to get employed and work so that they have regular incomes. Instead of sending young people to universities, we should trained them to become skilled workers.

It seems this writing is getting very long. I finish here, and I hope to hear from you soon.

Bets regrades,
Mortaza
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Now, I am confused!

Post by behnam »

Hi Amal,

How are you? I hope you are fine.

Now, I am confused! What do you mean? What Mohsen has mentioned are items that the girl's family gives to her and she takes them with herself to the boy's house, either it is rented, or his father has given to him, or in some cases, the house is also given by girl's father!Boys pay nothing! Although there are different wedding ceremonies which differ from tribe to tribe, people to people, family to family, culture to culture, etc. the main idea is the same: In Iran there is no 'تقدم' or 'تأخر'!

'عندالاستطاعه' or 'عندالمطالبه' is, somehow, the price of the girl which is written in the marriage document. I am not insulting girls. Actually, I don't know the equivalents of 'نقد' and 'نسيه' in English. Suppose you got to a grocery store to do the shopping. You haven't received your salary yet, or your husband is working in a governmental organization, it is the middle of the month, so poor man is not paid yet. You are run out of money, so you may say to the shopkeeper who knows you, "Excuse me! I will pay it by the end of this month, please write it down in your notebook". This is called 'نسيه'. It is said 'نقد'If you open your purse proudly and pay for the things[well, you haven't made it, so you easily spend it. As every unemployed woman, you enjoy spending it, I know! :lol: {-: :lol:]

Boys don't pay it. They just say, "I will pay it whenever you ask=عندالمطالبه", or a smarter version, "I will pay it whenever I can=عندالاستطاعه"! Well, when the price of girls are much too much high, poor boys find a way to get rid of it! :lol: {-: :lol:

Last week, a girl in my wife's family has engaged. The price of her is 2500 Iranian gold Coins! Each Iranian gold coin is about $500. A simple mathematics shows that the price of that girl is about $1,250,000! It is mind-blowing, isn't it? Who can give this amount of money? Nobody! However, if a person can give this amount of money, in my opinion, that person is stupid! By this amount of money one can sleep-until his dying day- with a virgin girl every night in abroad. {-: :lol: {-:

I may sound silly or stupid right now. I am not laughing at all. I am really crying. I am crying for this stupidity in my country! This is disastrous!

From the begging of the life, boys and girls start lying to each other. "I will pay whenever you ask for it"! Well, suppose the girl is going to ask tomorrow, next month, next year, etc. Will you pay? No! So, why are you lying? "I can't marry if I don't lie"! Amazingly, the girl knows that the boy is lying, but she agrees! This is really strange! This is ridiculous! This is a great compromise based on lies! One can easily guess about the events which are going to be happened in their life.

Are we following Islam and its rules? Never! So what? Are we Muslims? Yes we are. How? I don't know, we think God is like a powerful king and there are some people around him in his palace. We will find a way to fool Him, since we will find a person who is so close to God and then all things will be solved!

About Hijab, I am not going to write anymore. It is possible to awaken an asleep person, but it is not possible to awaken someone who is pretending to be asleep! The story of Hijab has been finished. Thankfully, women have received their rights in modern countries! Also in some Islamic countries they are allowed to put their...on display. A man like me sounds stupid and fundamentalist if he speaks about Hijab. I have no choice, either to participate in this competition; to let my wife become partially naked, consequently, to get the honour of becoming an open-minded man, or to come to terms with being labeled by narrow-mindedness and things like that! I won't follow them, if all the population of the world disagree with Hijab!

The West, thankfully, gave the women their human rights, that is to say by the definition of women's rights they had they gave the women freedom! Freedom of what? Freedom of offering themselves to the men without being paid the prices! Fulfilling men sexual needs for free and being still single! What else men need to be happy in the West?

Now, the mission about women's rights is accomplished. Another mission has been defined for satellite TV stations and the media! What is that? Freedom of gay marriage! It means that they are going to scale the open-mindedness of people by a new gauge! What is that gauge? You are modern, open-minded, wise, ...if you support gay marriage! If you disagree, you are stupid, narrow-minded, fundamentalist, ...!

The future projects will be about freedom of animal-human marriage! Dogs are much loyal than men! Cats are funny, etc.! You may laugh at me, but try to have a big field-of-view! You will see these things, just wait!

just be careful, they can easily introduce new scales and gauges, consequently, they can easily change the values and beliefs. This is a dirty game, but unfortunately, from the beginning of the history, some devilish people are playing with people's beliefs and values! They think of people as game pieces! They are fighting with God actually! Why did he say, "فانظرني الا يوم الجزاء"? That's obvious!

Just to mention, in the future, they may introduce different gauges to measure the open-mindedness of people, BUT, wise people should not let be measured, if they want to keep their beliefs, religions, values, etc. Don't let others measure you by the gauges they are using, try to scale phenomena by your own scales!

I wrote those things to all readers, although the post was addressed to my dear Muslim friend and sister Amal who has proved to be a real Muslim by all its definition!

All the best,
Behnam, 23 January, 2014
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