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Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Sun Dec 01, 2013 5:25 pm
by shahrubanu
That's ok. dear brother.I'm good at guessing but this time I can't guess his/her name:) it doesn't matter .You are always kind to your friends.Behnam you have a golden heart.I wonder how such a golden heart pumps blood into your vessels. Hearts are supposed to be made of meat, but yours is made of gold!
bye for now....miss you :)

The most valuable thing in the world!

Posted: Mon Dec 02, 2013 11:01 am
by behnam
Hi my dear sister Shahrbanu,

Your comments make me happy. You are very kind and friendly. I am proud of having a sister like you. Thank you very much for posting your friendly posts in this thread.

The price of gold is decreasing radically in Iran. I wish my heart was made of something more valuable than gold. What could it be? I don't know! What's the most valuable thing in the world? I guess this varies from person to person. For me, the most valuable thing in the world is satisfying God! What is your most valuable things?

Hope to hear from you soon.

All the best,
Behnam, 2 December, 2013

The art of conversation!

Posted: Mon Dec 02, 2013 12:12 pm
by behnam
Hi friends,

I was reading a report in a daily newspaper which was focusing on the causes of divorce in some countries(my country was included). Statistics show that the rate of divorce is increasing and the rate of marriage is decreasing in some countries. Experts have their own views on the causes and these issues have being discussed for a long time. As a matter of fact, the rate of registered divorces is high, but in reality it is higher than what is going on in the societies. A new phenomenon- Emotional Divorce-is not considered in statistics! What does it mean? It means that there are many officially married couples; living under the same roof, but haven't got any emotional involvements with each other! These couples are tolerating each other. They are actually not living. In some cases, despite having serious problems, couples tolerate each other because they have got children. They don't want their children to grow up in a single-parent family! However, some couples are emotionally divorced, whereas they haven't got any children! Unfortunately, this type of marriage is common among educated couples!!! Why?

This is a strange thing. There are limited sources to see and gather data about this phenomenon. It is hard to dig this issue more, because you cannot ask people to share their personal things, like in-bed quality, with others! How silly it would be, or what would you receive in response if you asked someone if s/he made love regularly and normally or not? You might receive a punch in the stomach. Don't try it! :lol:

Fortunately, for a basic primary study, you don't need to ask couples about their private lives. Although it is quite impossible to go to Mars and experience living there, scientists apply universal rules and guess how life could be on other planets. Similarly, you may not know what is going on among 'Emotionally Divorced' couples, but you can guess what is not going on! :lol:

One of the not-going-on things is conversation. They don't know how to talk with each other. They are both educated, but they don't know how to talk with each other! This is unbelievable, but we have to believe it! :lol:

Many people don't know how to make a constructive conversation. They lack the art of conversation. They speak; put words together and build sentences, but they don't understand the language of each other! Don't get me wrong! They are both from the same country and their mother tongue is the same! Why? Maybe, they don't listen to each other. Maybe their ears are closed!

In some aspects, conversation is similar to house-building. We have to make a strong foundation first, then put bricks on each other, using cement among them to keep them fixed, ...! Putting bricks with different shapes on each other without using cement result in nothing! You will finally have a pile of ruin! It is neither brick, nor cement! They are inseparable, worse than the initial states they had!

We should respect diplomacy. We should learn how to talk. Talking is different from barking! We need to talk wisely! Who am I writing to? Believe me, I am writing these things without thinking about someone. This is one of our serious everyday problems in this modern world with New Phenomena! :lol: :lol: :lol:

I have to leave right now. I have no time to check the mistakes and to correct them. So sorry!

All the best,
Behnam, 2 December, 2013

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Tue Dec 03, 2013 1:18 pm
by [amal]
Hi Behnam,

How are you?

Thanks for you posts, I really love your words.

I read your post about report in the newspaper which focusing on divorce. In fact, I think these days the divorce is increasing because both men and women become independent and both of them have their interests which are different from each other. Therefore, they lose the communication. Above that, nowadays, everything is changing, men are changing and women are changing. The value of morality and loyalty has changed too. So it's normal to see such marriages and divorces!

Dear, How is your marriage? Or maybe, I shouldn't ask! I maybe receive a punch in the stomach! :roll: :-D :-D :lol:

Wish you a happy life.
Amal

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Tue Dec 03, 2013 8:28 pm
by Mohsen


Hi Behnam,

Your suggestion about going to that lady's home is tempting, especially for me, because my wife from time to time stays at her mother's home and some nights I am alone until the morning like tonight. Also that lady is a special case, she lost her husband in a car accident few years ago and now she is single. it is difficult for a married woman to continue her life singly. I think it is my duty to help her ,for seeking of God I should help her and save her from depression. :oops: :oops:
At first when I read your suggestion, my judge was unfair; I told myself that Behnam is one the Satan's soldier. But tonight I changed my mind, you are right, I am alone tonight and she is alone at her house. I will call her and make a decision whether she comes to my house or I go to her house. You know that there is a difference between having a visit with a woman and a girl. The girls should have permission from her parents,but woman doesn't need. I am talking about Islamic limits. As I told you she is special case. I can visit her without making sin and consider that I may save her from deviation ,I receive reward from God.

Now I am sinking in my thoughts ,your enticing suggestion. I can't focus on anything else. I read you detail description about divorce. Thank you , you right it excellently. But I didn't get a part of it "A new phenomenon- Emotional Divorce-is not considered in statistics! What does it mean? It means that there are many officially married couples; living under the same roof, but haven't got any emotional involvements with each other!"

What is emotional divorce , and why when it doesn't consider in statistics , it means that registered married couples haven't got emotional involvements?

I was in Tehran international spare parts and car exhibition for two days , I humbly requested my boss to left me alone and visited the exhibition without me . but he didn't responded to my plea and took me to this journey by force ( God may make his life short) . I really don't like travelling , visiting fair ,coming back with a bag full of catalogues ,DVDs and echantillons.

My best time is when I am lying in bed and watch TV

All the best
Mohsen

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Wed Dec 04, 2013 6:28 pm
by behnam
Hi Amal,

Your post made me extremely happy. Thank you very much. You write beautifully. I love your writings VERY much.

In answer to your question, my marriage is happy. We've got many emotional involvements with each other! :lol:

Dear Amal, there is a channel on TV entitled 'Press TV'! It is in English. I seldom watch TV, but if I have a chance to watch it, I watch 'Press TV' which broadcasts global news. The news about your country makes my heart painful. The war has made Syria go back to stone age. Some sections of Damascus is actually a pile of ruins! I hope they will make an agreement in coming conference in Geneva!

All the best,
Behnam, 4 December, 2013

Challenging things!

Posted: Thu Dec 05, 2013 1:38 pm
by behnam
Mohsen wrote:I can visit her without making sin and consider that I may save her from deviation ,I receive reward from God.


Hi Mohsen,

I am sure your wife isn't aware of your posts. What you have written is challenging. Visiting someone isn't forbidden and then sinful.You may mean something else by 'visiting'! How can you save a widow from deviation(as you have put it) by visiting her? How skilful you are! By the way, what do you mean by 'deviation'? You have written such challenging vague things, because you have found the thread empty from brave ladies. When the cat is away the mice play!
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Mohsen wrote:What is emotional divorce , and why when it doesn't consider in statistics, it means that registered married couples haven't got emotional involvements?


Suppose you decide to carry out a study on the rate of divorce or marriage in a society. What will you do? You may go to some registry offices where the information about registered marriages and divorces is kept. After gathering some data you may conclude that, in big cities, one in three marriages ends in divorce! This is 'called statistical study' of an issue.

However, there are some couples. They are living under the same roof, but they have nothing to do with each other. They are married, but they don't have any marital activities! These people have marital problems, but they haven't went to a registry office to get divorced and register it!

Dear Mohsen, joking aside, the lady you are speaking about is an occasional case, but I guess you don't dare to take this golden opportunity. You either feel afraid of your wife, or you are not strong enough to handle the issues! Islam is in danger man! Why don't you hammer the nail of Islam in kofr-threatening land? :lol: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 5 December, 2013

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Tue Dec 10, 2013 8:17 pm
by Mohsen


Hi Behnam,

There are legal behaviours which are allowed by law, Deviation is when someone infringe the law. What is the law? The law in our society is the rules that God develops in order to have whole people following it.

Surly my wife doesn't know about my post, good deed should be done in hidden ,charity should be paid in secret.

When people who were men of true piety and devoted their life to God, have fallen in love ,lost their faith and couldn't control their feeling .What should I expect myself , I am not more faithful than Shiekh Sanan.

Shiekh Sanan who was living in Mecca, left there and went to RUOM, There he saw a beautiful Christian girl. He fell into passionate love with the young girl, forgetting his place among his followers and his prominence as a learned and spiritual pious Muslim.
The girl, who was much younger than the Sheik refused his love and instead asked him to perform impossible tasks, throwing obstacles in his way in order to change his mind. She asked him to worship an idol (highest crime in Islam), burn the Quran, drink wine (forbidden in Islam) and finally to lose his faith in Islam. Of all four requests the Sheik only agreed to drinking wine and asked the girl to forewent the other three.
The girl then asked for the Sheik to become a Christian. He agreed to her demand and changed his religion. Having seen no hope in averting the Sheik's love, the girl asked for him to provide her with dowry money. The Sheik, having lost his faith and gotten into the habit of drinking, responded that he neither had spiritual wealth nor material possessions. The young girl feels sorry for him and instead of a dowry asks him to attend to her hog farm (a sacrilege in Islam) for one year.
Having Bewildered by Sheik's apparent state of lost spirituality and craze, his followers tried to find a way to rescue him. They asked one of his Morid "devout followers" who was away at the time of his departure from Mecca, to come and lend a hand. The follower went to Ruom and found the Sheik in the pathetic state of raising pigs! He then asked the followers to pray for the Sheik for forty days, asking God to bring back the Sheik in to the path of righteousness.
After forty days, the prophet Mohammed came to the Morid's dream and informed him of God's will to return Sheik's sanity back to him. As for the girl, she waked up one morning and realized what she had done to the Sheik and asked forgiveness from God, becomes a Muslim and follows him as her spiritual leader.
You see Behnam , I have not Morid to pray for me ,I have a friend who encourage me to hummer the nail :shock: :shock: :shock: .
What do you expect me , I am alone tonight and bewildered
:~:

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 12:43 pm
by Moroo
Hi to you all {-:

How are you all. Really I miss you all.

Sorry I don't write here often but I'm following your beautiful posts. :-(

These days I'm trying to chat with many people as much as I can to make my English better, hope I reach my goal.

Most of the chatter are not nice like you.

Although I'm using chat rooms for the people who want to practice English, they only need to use facebook or skype or exchange photos.

The chat conversation is always short it's all about introducing yourself no more after you finish with the person no longer talk, every day I have to start with new one with the same start no longer conversation, I think it doesn't help me to practice English.

Anyway I'll keep chatting till I see what will happen.

I only like this thread very much but the problem with me I don't find any topic to talk about, No exchange.

I just write to share with you my experience and my thoughts.

See you soon my beautiful friends. :-P

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Mon Dec 16, 2013 1:14 pm
by Moroo
Hi to all my friends.

Hope you are fine.

I like what Mohsen wrote about his family life, he reminds me of myself, I also help my wife in every household chore including taking care of our kids, I'm changing the diapers for my baby and helping him sleep, hanging the washing etc

I'm not shay to say that because I believe democrat husband should help his wife, this will make his wife love him much much more.

I believe that the man who said that women should work Injustice her because how can she work beside her household chore, and most of the time she share her salary at home.

And after the man came back after work he just sit and watch TV while she start her house chore although both of them came from work, how comes!

I help her in everything because I believe that married life is all about sharing.

Wife is always blamed if she take care of her children and the household chore and omitted her husband.

And if she take care of her husband and omitted her children.

See you soon

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Mon Dec 16, 2013 1:29 pm
by Moroo
Have anyone heard before that a father love himself more than his children!

It's a real story that happening.

If so please let me know.

Merry Christmas!

Posted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 11:09 am
by behnam
Hi to all,

In this cold weather, feeling nostalgic about the old days, missing my friends and their words, although I am early, I may not have the chance to say 'Merry Christmas' to my Christian friends at the right time. Therefore, I'd like to take this opportunity to say a warm 'Merry Christmas' to the people who celebrate the birth of Jesus(PBUH)! I'd like to say 'Happy New Year' to you too. I hope 2014 will bring more peace, success, happiness, and prosperity to all people in all over the world.

All the best,
Behnam, 17 December, 2013

I pray for you all the time!

Posted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 11:26 am
by behnam
Hi Mohsen,

How are you? I hope you are fine. I didn't know you are in love with that lady. If I had known, I'd have prayed for you.

You are lucky Mohsen since your heart-taker, in-love-maker, beloved angel, sweet soul-mate is neither Christian nor in Rome! You don't need to take a great effort to hammer the nail of Islam, since the land is so close to you and ready to reap! The only thing you need is some courage or bravery.

I still don't know what deviation is and how you are going to prevent her from deviation. Would you mind explaining more?

All the best,
Behnam, 17 December, 2013

Welcome Back!

Posted: Tue Dec 17, 2013 12:10 pm
by behnam
Hi Moroo,

Welcome back! How is life there? I hope all is going well with you. Thank you for your posts.

Life has become too complicated to live! In comparison with the past, women have more freedom and liberty. They have improved their general knowledge and have received their degrees from universities. They have participated in many social activities and work market. However, something is wrong! I believe there is something wrong with people!

First, we should keep in mind that for some people knowing something is more dangerous than being ignorant about it. Women know many things, but those things aren't useful for them. They know how to work, how to drive, how to earn money, how to design, etc. but they have less necessary skills.

From the time I have seen the world around myself, my parents have been working shoulder-to-shoulder. Well, there are some chores that my mother is more skillful and good at. For example, my mother cooks much better than my father, so she seldom wants my father to cook. She doesn't need my father to prove his love by cooking. He has proven his pure love in other areas of life.

On the other hand, my father is very good at doing the shopping. Therefore, he does it almost all the time.

Old couples are happier than young ones, since they are more sincere and honest with each other. However, young couples don't believe each other. They must prove themselves! How? One way for men to prove themselves is being a yes-man! Amazingly, husbands have to prove themselves to their wives; wives don't need to prove themselves to their husbands.

It is a fact that men and women are different. Wise couples respect the differences. However, those differences cause fool couples either compete or fight with each other. You cannot expect a bull to give milk, similarly, you cannot expect a cow to reap farms! Everything has got its special talents, abilities, and capabilities.

I don't oppose working at home and helping my wife, but these things can never make me a good husband. I have to take responsibilities and try in other areas of life.

All the best,
Behnam, 17 December, 2013

Correction!

Posted: Wed Dec 18, 2013 12:21 pm
by behnam
Hi friends,

I've got nothing to do, nowhere to go, tired and bored, killing time! Writing is the only soothing thing. Sometimes, I think of writing a book, but I don't know in which field the book should be written, about Physics or something general. I wish you could help me with choosing a subject for writing.

Today, 2 friends of mine separately came to my office and asked me for solutions to some problems about Modern Physics and Quantum Mechanics. I solved the problems perfectly and explained the solutions understandably. One of them was in my office for about 2 hours. We discussed many physical phenomena. He said, 'Behnam, why don't you write a book? You think differently and look at things from different angels. I am sure many students will pray for you after reading your down-to-earth way of describing things." I laughed at him and said, "Come on man! Physics is an isolated area in the Third World." I added something to give a reason for my opinion but I'd rather not write it here! :lol:

Oh, I forgot to say that the main reason for writing this post is correcting a big mistake which is made in my previous post.
behnam wrote:You cannot expect a bull to give milk, similarly, you cannot expect a cow to reap farms!

Although surely you have understood what is meant by this sentence, it is unusual and meaningless, because 'REAP' is used incorrectly. It must be 'PLOUGH' which is done by oxen! Therefore, the sentence must be 'You cannot expect an ox to give milk, similarly, you cannot expect a cow to plough the field'. :lol:

My final point for today is challenging: Loneliness and singlism are threatening humanity in this century. The role of women in coping with these disastrous problems; which are both the products of Capitalism is crucially important, is crucially important. What is the solution? Following the instructions of God in the Holy Koran. What? Allowing men to have more than one wife! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Correction Again!:)

Posted: Wed Dec 18, 2013 4:46 pm
by behnam
Hi again,

If you look for an excuse to write a post just follow my strategy: Make some mistakes in one post and correct your mistakes in another one!
:lol: :lol: :lol:
behnam wrote:We discussed many physical phenomena. He said, 'Behnam, why don't you write a book? You think differently and look at things from different angels.
It must be angles not 'angels', but that's funny to look at things of different angels!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

I was in a hurry when writing the previous post in my office. Actually, a friend of mine was waiting for me at the door. We had to attend at a meeting. I lost my concentration because he kept saying, "Behnam, hurry up, Behnam we are late!" That's why I forgot to write my famous 'All the best, Behnam, ..... {-; '! By the way, 'Crucially important' is repeated unwillingly. Sorry for making many mistakes. I apologize! Honestly speaking, they(mistakes) provide me with an excuse to write. :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 18 December, 2013

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 6:33 am
by Mohsen

Hi Moroo,

I agree with you about helping your wife in the house affairs, when there is love between couples, they try to treat kindly, overtake each other to settle down the house and help more, the house is not a battle ground, it is a love ground.

I also agree with Behnam's idea that woman and man have some skills in different aspects of life. so the works should be totally divided between them according to the skills , the nature of woman heart is more tender than man,so the child is more calm in her mother 's arm, especially when she milks.But the couple's life should not be divided between lines and duties; we are not living in police station or a work place. The regulations in house is flexible ,there are much possibilities for the both sides to help each other.

I generally don't agree that woman works outside. Unfortunately most of jobs have been recently captured by woman in our society , and women believes that it is the women progress while it is a reactionary idea ,what make our society close to west systems is regression not progress.

All the best ,
Mohsen

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Thu Dec 19, 2013 6:40 am
by Mohsen

Hi behnam,

Thanks for your congratulation message to Christians for Christmas. Because there is no one in the this forum, I thanks behalf of them. Luckily the Yalda night is in front of us , and we should be ready for the longest night of the year.

The shops are overflowed with different fruits, candies and meats . Fortunately the watermelons are cheaper than last year, in my city the price is between 400 to 600 Toman/kgs ( about one sixth of dollar) , I bought a box of orange ( 20 Kgs) 1800 Toman/kgs which has wonderful taste , juicy and thin skin . It was called Birjandi orange, of course I bought it directly from main distributer in vegetable mall, so the price is cheaper than usual one.

Something wrong about the women who lost her husband is loyalty . It is said that a good woman and loyal woman is the one who doesn't marry again ,if she lose her husband in an accident.
The woman should kill her wishes,sexall passions because of a wrong culture ( the people and relative talks and gossips).This is the deviation risks

One the staffs in my work place lost his wife because of cancer , he remarried with a girl after passing 30 day from death of his late wife . Many people cursed him , because he was expected at to waited at least for 40 days . because 40 days ceremony is current in our society . but he bravery did his marriage and claimed that it was difficult for him not to arm a girl in bed ,even for one night.

All the best
Mohsen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Fri Dec 20, 2013 1:41 am
by [amal]
Hi Behnam,

I want to wish you a happy birthday my great friend, I really don't know how the life would be without you, you've lightened my life and for sure other friends' lives!
I know it's still early but I want to be the first person who says that to you! {-;

Dear, sorry about my late reply, I wanted to write one long time ago but sadly because the electricity is off most of the time, I delayed the matter. :-(

However, finally today I decided to write something. Since I hate to let you waiting and maybe it would make me relax and let me forget the war which is going between my mind and heart! I thought this war will end today and I will be able to write with a clear mind but sadly it didn't! Uh! :-(
I just chose to rely on god!

By the way your challenge point is really important and it should be discussed seriously...

I think the lack of loyalty and trust are the main factors in this problem. If men and women were faithful to each other, the society would be healthy.

Another factor should be considered too is the high dowry, which girls' families always care about without any understanding of the circumstances of young people!

The girls' families think that they are protecting their daughters but they don't know that they are ,on the same hand, reducing her chances of getting married!
Our prophet Mohamad said:
اذا اتاكم
من ترضون دينه و خلقه فزوجوه الا تفعلو تكن فتنة في
الارض

In result, our "dimension of religion?" is an important reason for this phenomenon..
In my idea if girls' families started to follow our prophet's rule and started to understand and help young men, their girls' lives would be much happier and that would increase their chances of getting married...

In fact, what attracted me is your solution! Dear, don't you think that god has allowed men to marry more than once, without any conditions or controls?!

I mean there should be some reasons for them to remarry, what if their wives were perfect?! what if the men weren't able to justice?! don't you think that would cost more problems and invalidate the requirement of marriage more than once?!

For me, as I told you before, I don't have any problems with being single but I hate it when someone enters my life and starts playing with my feelings and thoughts and let me think of the whole marriage matter again!!! :roll:

Let me stop talking about this subject now and start with another one...

You said that you that you watch Press TV when the chance is possible, believe it or not, I also used to watch it in the past too! Their English is very clear so I took it as a way to improve mine!

However, after a while I became very sensitive and the news started to make a big harm to me since it's speaking about my beloved country and the situation here.

It's really something dramatical to watch the people who you used to live with are killed and the places which you used to go are destroyed! Meanwhile, you can do nothing! It really breaks my heart! :cry: :cry:

Then, I dislike the way which the media is dealing with our matter.
For exa, they just focus on the things which serve their OWN benefits not Syrian people's benefits!

On the other hand, I think that whatever is shown on TV is meaningless. Since it change nothing and it doesn't effect on decision makers, so what's the point of hearing it?! Decision makers are happy with what's happening here and I don't think that they want to end it.
Therefore, I don't have much hope on the conference in Geneva!

Anyway, May god be with us.

Best wishes,
Amal

The Smell of Love! (Part One)

Posted: Fri Dec 20, 2013 11:19 am
by behnam
Hi Amal,

You cannot imagine how happy I became when I saw your post. It made me extremely happy. Thank you very much for participating in reading the posts and posting your views in the thread. You have proved that you are a sincere person. You have kept the contact with the thread for years. This is very valuable. Thank you very much indeed.

One of the things we all need is stability. In particular, stability in friendship brings comfort to us. Some people are unpredictable and fickle. No matter they are friends, lovers, husbands or wives, etc. they are always unpredictable. Sometimes, they are too much hot in a way that their hotness burns you. Sometimes they are frigid in a way that their coldness freezes you! People who are fluctuating between the maximum and the minimum cannot be successful at all. 'Love me little, but love me long' is an appropriate saying for this discussion.

Another thing we all need is tolerance. If we want to live on the Earth together, we have to tolerate each other. We are absolutely different. We have got different cultures, beliefs, religions, values, tastes, ideas, opinions, field of views, philosophies, etc. These differences are really beautiful. They seem amazing if we look on the bright side of them. They beautifully show the high capability of humanity.

I was taking part in a course at my workplace. It was about management skills. At the beginning the professor, who has a degree in the humanities, asked a very good question. "According to Islam, for everything, a relevant donation( زکات) is considered. For example, the donation
of knowledge is spreading(teaching) it", he said and then asked, "what is the donation of wisdom(العقل)?" Everybody said something, but nobody could give the right answer. He himself wrote on the board while he was saying, "قال علی (ع): زکات العقل تحمل الجاهل"[Imam Ali(PBUH) has said, "Tolerating fools is the donation of wisdom"] . We got surprised. We all found that saying wonderful.

Wise people have to tolerate fools, although it is too difficult to tolerate them. However, this seems to be impossible when close friendship or particular relationship such as marriage comes to considering. Men and women have got different levels of wisdom, knowledge, intelligence, talents, skills, abilities, capabilities, etc. When making friends, getting married, establishing a relationship, etc. we must take these factors into account, otherwise sooner or later we will meet the failure in the life.

Let's assume that an educated lady(these days in Iran, if you randomly point at a girl in the street, she will have at least a BSc or BA degree) has married to a man with a lower level of degree in terms of education. What would happen to her marital life if she kept comparing her degree with her husband's degree? Suppose the lady is a very obedient and kind person, but the man is brutal, how could the lady tolerate such cruelty and violence? Why should she do that? These things make life complicated and unbearable. That's why Islam has strictly recommended that couples should be at the same level of wisdom, knowledge, wealth, etc.

What am I saying? I guess I have digressed! :lol: :lol: :lol: Well, we are human beings and the Earth is the only place for us to live. There is no mankind on the other planets. Therefore, neither can we send or fools to, for instance, Mars nor we can bring some proper people to keep the balance between the fool and the wise in the societies. What can we do?

Justice is the key. If justice goes out from the window, misery will come in from the door! How can we bring justice to a society? I don't know how, I'd rather not discuss, but I am sure Capitalism isn't a proper ideology. Why? Because it widens the gap between the poor and the rich. What happens then? This is the first step of misery. This will bring other complicated problems that we are all facing with in the world now. A society may claim it is governed by Islamic rule, but it spreads Capitalism practically. Actions speak louder than words.

I agree with you that TV channels are following their own benefits. This is the rule. In addition to that, there is a world difference between speaking about something-which TV channels often do-and the facts which are going on in a society. But, honestly speaking, Syria's conflict makes me sad and disappointed. We should all know that this conflict is, on the one hand, a result of laziness, naivety, timidity, and silliness. On the other hand, it is one of the products of fundamentalism and foolishness. Syrian people MUST wake up and find a way themselves!

About 'dowry', I didn't get your point. In Iran, girls' families give property or money to boys when they marry. This is ridiculous and insulting. I disagree with this traditional custom. For more details, you can ask our expert Mohsen. I am sure he knows the philosophy behind 'dowry'. I personally think it is unreasonable to bring up a beautiful girl for many years and provide her with property or money and finally give her to a boy...! Why? To make her feel like a mother? To keep the generation going? I don't know! :lol: :lol: :lol:
...........


Will be Continued!



The Smell of Love! (Part Two)

Posted: Fri Dec 20, 2013 11:20 am
by behnam
..............

About loyalty, let me say bravely and safely that you cannot find even one loyal man in the world. Loyalty is against men's nature. Forget those candy-coated words that men often say to their lovers. It is one of the rules in the game which is called life! How can you expect someone not to eat anything when s/he has got stomach? :lol: Women should understand that men are totally different from them. They must be different. Nothing is wrong with those differences.

Men fool women and women fool men! This is a historical game. Let's not fantasize about love and lovers. Love is a feeling to fool people into marrying and starting families. This beautiful word is invited to be said in order to fulfill our needs. Necessity is the mother of invention. :lol: From the beginning of the history men have learned they must lie in order to get closer to women. If they said, "I've got something, and you've got something else. These complete each other. In other words, I need yours, you need mine. Let's ...!", :lol: certainly women wouldn't agree. Men might have to apply force to fulfill their needs. Some men might use force to get what they needed, but little by little they have learned to pursue a different strategy in order to derive much pleasure from women! Therefore, they have put their heads together and invited 'love'. Instead of saying directly what you want or revealing your needs, it is better to coat your intention with sugar or some sweet substance to tame women! 'I love you' is a powerful sentence! Some naughty advisers advise people to learn 'I love you' in different languages. Well, this is a useful tool for people who want to taste different... Different what? I don't know... :lol: :lol: :lol:

Thank you for reading.


All the best,
Behnam, 20 December, 2013

Happy The Longest Night of The Year!

Posted: Sat Dec 21, 2013 11:24 am
by behnam
Hi,

Tonight is the longest night of the year on the Northern Hemisphere. Iranian people celebrate this night. They sit around and eat dried nuts and fruits. This night is called 'Yalda'. It is a girl name too. In Iran, you can find many women who are named 'Yalda'. Iranian Azerbaijanis call it Chilla Gejasi, which means the beginning of the first 40 days of winter. For further information please either go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yald%C4%81 or ask our expert Mohsen!


به صد یلدا الهی زنده باشی
انار و سیب و انگور خورده باشی
اگر یلدای دیگر من نباشم
تو باشی و تو باشی و تو باشی


Happy YALDA to all Iranian people in all over the world!

All the best,
Behnam, 21st December, 2013

Happy Birthday Behnam! :)

Posted: Sat Dec 21, 2013 11:47 am
by behnam
Hi Behnam,

How are you? I hope you are fine. A little bird said that it is your birthday. This is just to say a warm 'Happy Birthday' to you.


Shab-e-Yalda kimin ballidi adim,
Aziz dustlar olmamisham sagham man.


I am as famous as Yalda night, my dear friends I am still alive!

Best wishes,
Your old friends:
Roya, Marina, Elham, Amal, Mohsen, Veronica, Kamelia, Setayesh, Andrew, Rosa, Maryam, Mitra, Adelaida, Zita, Asal, Nilufar, Nahid, Reyhaneh, Parvin, Roghayyeh, Fatemeh, and others!

Describing a pleasure is half of enjoying it! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


All the best,
Behnam, 21 December, 2013

You Are Not the Same as Yesterday You Were

Posted: Sat Dec 21, 2013 4:29 pm
by Mohsen
Once a year I get the chance
To wish you birthday cheer.
It pleases me no end to say,
I wish you another great year.
So happy birthday to you ,Behnam,
From the bottom of my heart.
And may your good times multiply,
Till they’re flying off the chart!


B.Wishes
Mohsen and his friends

Barry , Harry , Jerry , Larry , Mary , Perry , Terri

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Sat Dec 21, 2013 5:24 pm
by Elham
Hi dear Behnam,

You don't know how much I have missed you, you know nothing about how's going with your old friend, a girl who was used to be called a close and nice friend....

But you should know sth... and you know it for sure....


Happy Birthday,

Wish you all the best in the world,

Eli

We Are Still Friends!

Posted: Tue Dec 24, 2013 11:37 am
by behnam
Hi Elham,

How are you? How is life in Najafabad? I hope everything is going well with you. Here, the weather is dangerously polluted. I suffer from this polluted weather. I feel some pain in my lungs when there are pollutants in the air. I am wearing a filter, but it doesn't help.

Thank you so much for your nice post which was, as always, full of feelings. I'd like to confess that we are still friends. Nothing can kill our pure human feelings to each other. We may make some conclusions or have some expectations in accordance with our assumptions, which are usually different from the facts, but we shouldn't let those things break the tree of unconditional friendship. This tree is holy since it reflects our past. We have to water it and protect it from damages.

Well, the philosophy of friendship may differ from person to person and from time to time, but what matters is the existence of a philosophy in friendship which gives us the excuse to either form a new friendship or keep the old one. I believe, as long as people have got a philosophy, no matter it is an extensive one or a limited one, they should follow it provided that the philosophy brings them some benefits, either spiritual or material. Oh, this subject is delicate. I may make you confused. Let's move on it! {-:

Posting in this thread, using my favourite colour in writing, may make you think that I am the same Behnam, with the same passion and full of enthusiasm, but you are one hundred percent wrong! I am not the same Behnam. White hairs on my cheeks and chin loudly say that Behnam is old. Not only does my body yell that its owner is old, but also my feelings say that leaving time is close to coming. Actually, I am writing to inform my friends that I am still alive. This comes from my loyalty to friendship and friends. Nothing else can keep me here!

We are still friends, either you want it or not!

All the best,
Behnam, 24 December, 2013

Merry Christmas!

Posted: Thu Dec 26, 2013 3:27 am
by behnam
Hi,

I'd like to say
'Merry Christmas' to all my Christian friends. May Jesus Christ, Prophet of love & peace, bless us all on this day. Wishing Merry Christmas to those celebrating, especially Iranian Christians.

All the best,
Behnam, 25 December, 2013

Answers!

Posted: Thu Dec 26, 2013 10:22 am
by behnam
Hi,

An old friend of mine has put off messages on my 'Yahoo Messenger' account and has asked two important questions. First of all, I'd like to thank this good friend for reading the posts carefully and paying attention to them closely.

The first question is about my philosophy of friendship. I've written that the philosophy of friendship may change with the times. That's normal. In addition to that, people can develop their philosophies. When a philosophy doesn't work in a particular situation, we have to either change it or change the situation. Determined people first try to change or review the situation. If they cannot change it, they wisely develop their philosophies to make them adapted to the situation.

The kinds of relationship between people can be different. Some people are our relatives. Some others are our colleagues. Some people are our friends. Some of them are special to us. Some are strangers, etc. Among friends, some of them are close friends. Some others are not that close. Like many quantitative parameters, friendship can be quantified by some numbers. For example, we can give number 100 to an ideal friendship, and number 0 to a neutral person in our lives. Definitely, our enemies will fall into minus side of this scale and will get negative numbers.

Ideal friendship isn't an absolute thing. People have different ideas about it. Its definition varies from person to person. Someone, in his/her frame of reference, may give 100 to his/her friendship with somebody, but this person(somebody:) ) may quantify the friendship with another number. Well, people have different frame of references, consequent results of different philosophies.


What is philosophy? The meaning of philosophy is 'the attitude or set of ideas that guides the behaviour of a person or organization'. We can change our ideas or modify them or make them more suitable for the situation we are in. In other words, we can change our frame of reference, our scale of measurement.

The second question was actually a comment on my view about the definition of love which has come in the post written to dear Amal. As I have written, love is only a feeling young people experience it when the nature makes them ready(fool them) to look for their Mr/Mrs right, to get married and start families. This is noun-negotiable. This is not optional. We don't choose this feeling. The nature gives it to us. By the way, knowing this fact should not make us disappointed, because it is something common among us. All I am saying is briefly that 'love is an instinctive feeling'. It is the trick of nature to fool us and cause us to marry and keep the generation going. Nature knows how to fool us. She is (has been)successful.

Another friend of mine has asked the meaning of "..my feeling says leaving time is close to coming...". The meaning is clear, but maybe it has been shocking. Well, when you have white hairs on your cheeks, chin, chest, ..., it means you are old. When you've got a broken heart, and you suffer from a heart operation, you feel that it is time to leave this earthy world. We will all leave this world, sooner or later. This is a fact. We shouldn't fool ourselves. Don't worry! Bad things never die! (بادنجان بم آفت نداره ) :lol: :lol: {-: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 26 December, 2013

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Thu Dec 26, 2013 8:17 pm
by Mohsen

Hi Behnam,
Hope you are fine, it is said that a person is young while he feels love,and you have time as long as you love.
You said that love is an instinctive feeling , I agree, but it is not like feeling thirst or hunger. Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. also love needs its conditions, the sexual desire would be crucial to create the love. Normally love creates between two opposite sex. What makes two opposite sex to be in love , the sexual desire is an instinctive feeling ,so it creates love. My reason is why love always creates between two opposite sexes.

The second point is the environment. For example a man who works with several girls in his work place ,he has working relations with her colleagues ,but there is more possible circumstances for his madness , beautiful gardens with scenic beauty providing an icing on the cake to the strong feeling of love and blossoming romance between a girl and a boy head over heels in love
The third point is the movies , people believe that their real world as what they watch in a movie, the stories which are shown on the celluloid about love to create a misconception intentionally or unintentionally that love is a beautiful experience and an inevitable part of our lives.

All the best
Mohsen

Discussion!

Posted: Fri Dec 27, 2013 9:52 am
by behnam
Mohsen wrote:Normally love creates between two opposite sex. What makes two opposite sex to be in love , the sexual desire is an instinctive feeling ,so it creates love. My reason is why love always creates between two opposite sexes.


Hi Mohsen,

Many thanks for expressing your opinion about the topic. I totally agree with your first paragraph. If we dig deeper to see what creates love, we will immediately realise that two hormones are playing the main role. According to scientists, Testosterone and Oestrogen are responsible for the mail and female qualities respectively. How those substances work? That is mysterious. However, it is a proven fact that if you change the levels of those hormones in someone's body, their male or female qualities will change. For example, if the level of Testosterone goes up in a girl's body, she may have beard and mustache. For the same reason, Testosterone has caused me to get bald. :lol: {-: :lol:

Your second and third paragraph both are different from the first one. In the first paragraph you are explaining love, but in the rest of the post you are mentioning to two nice points which are quite different from the discussed topic. Those points are actually two possible answers to the potential question 'what triggers the love?' or 'What makes the love start?'

Talking about love is not easy, since it is one of the signs of God, as He Has said in the Holy Koran, Rome-22. However, from philosophy point of view, it is quite obvious that necessity creates love. Generally speaking, incompleteness creates needs, and needs create movements towards fulfillment. These are steps towards perfection!

Let me digress for a moment. Physics is really beautiful. Physics helps people think beautifully. If we want to understand the universe, we have to know Physics. If we want to be a good physicist we have to deeply understand cause and effect. Not only do we have to understand it, but also we have to love and respect this main principle of the universe. :lol: {-: :lol:

In order to get more, we have to analyse those two responsible hormones. How do they work? What are those hormones made from? When I was studying at university, I got interested in Physiology of Arthur Guyton. I read some chapters. It was(is) a useful book. However, nobody can answer to this question, "What causes the right opposite sexes(people who have the right amount of those hormones in their bodies) to attract each other?" This is mysterious and miraculous. To make people have an image about it I often say, "Suppose men and women are like empty egg cartons. They have mountains and valleys. The mountains go inside the valleys easily and they become stable. This is what we can see in the world of materials. Now, suppose such mountains and valleys exist in our spirits(in the spiritual world which is not deniable). Although they are invisible, the effect of them is sensible, and that is the attraction we feel and call it love."

Something crossed my mind a few seconds ago. As you may now, in terms of their behaviour in an external magnetic field, materials categorized into three groups. They are either Paramagnetic, or Diamagnetic, or Ferromagnetic. Paramagnetism is a form of magnetism whereby certain materials are attracted by an externally applied magnetic field. In contrast with this behavior, diamagnetic materials are repelled by magnetic fields. Ferromagnetism is the basic mechanism by which certain materials (such as iron) form permanent magnets, or are attracted to magnets. Now, suppose God has created(has put) an external magnetic filed in the universe. Philosophically speaking, we can consider necessity(incompleteness) as an external magnetic field. Now, consider one of the hormones( Testosterone or Oestrogen) to behave like Paramagnetic materials and the other one to behave like Diamagnetic objects. These materials may attract each other when they are exposed to an external field which we have already named them 'incompleteness'! Wonderful, fantastic! :lol: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 27 December, 2013

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Sat Dec 28, 2013 1:28 am
by [amal]
Hi Behnam,

How are you?

Thanks dear for writing that "explanation post" to me and other friends.. I was too worried about you and I even write an off but there was no answer!
Your words were verrrrry shocking! I couldn't sleep that night when I read them! YOU ARE OLD???!!!! And you are speaking about leaving time???!!! Oh my god!!! just some white hears on your chest let you feel so??!!!!!! What should my father say???!!! He is older than you and he had a heart operation, too. He is still working and ,by the way, his job is very hard and important! But he doesn't complain and he doesn't speak about leaving time!!!

Dear Behnam again I am sorry for being late in reply, I am not stone-hearted but my grandma is sick and we took her to the hospital. Above that, the electricity was off last two days... And NO, I didn't get married because these days there are a lot of males but there is no men! I will tell you the rest of that story when we chat inshallah..

Anyway, thanksss a lot for " The Smell Of Love!", I loved reading the both parts, I even read them many times... You are smart! "as usual" {-; I love your life philosophy...

In one of your posts, you were confused about what field of books you can write, so why don't you write about your life philosophy?! I am sure it would be a great book and it would take a big success in all over the world..

About "dowry"I didn't get your point too! :lol: Why should girls' families give money for the boys??!!! As you said it's insulting!
Then why do you always say "ask Mohsen"?! Well, I will ask Mohsen... but why don't you speak and explain to us about your traditions?! why do you always feel that you aren't a part of that society?! {-:

Dear Mohsen please explain to us the philosophy behind dowry action!!!!

Behnam, what I meant by dowry and what is happening here is that girls' families ask a high "مؤخر و مقدم" for their girls and that means that the boy here who should pay the money, they also ask for gold and a house too... The girls' families here pay nothing except the cost of the engagement party.

So what I was saying is: If the girls families just have a little sympathy with the boys and didn't ask for a high amount of money, spinsterhood matter would be solved!

Dear, I heard that in Iran the government force the girls to wear the hejab, is that right?! Why should they do that?! what is the point behind this action?!

Don't you think that they should give them the freedom to choose and decide what they want?! Another thing came to my mind, if god himself, when he put the rules, he put them and left the choice to us and let us choose between the bad and the good thing, therefore the government shouldn't force them!

When we are forced to do sth, it becomes like a habit or a costume not a religious matter! And it doesn't show if the person were a believer or not..

For example, here most of the women who hide their faces and cover them with black hejab are bad, they hide their action with this costume and try to deludes people that they are religious women..
Therefore, whenever someone ask me why don't I hide my face, I immediately say NO! And the bad idea about the women who wear it come to my mind!! They completely spoiled the meaning of it.

The same thing happened when when we force a bad girl to wear the hejab, it will give a bad idea for others about it -especially for non-Muslims..
For sure the next generation will hate the hejab just because of this irresponsible action.

Thanks for reading.

Best wishes,
Amal

Thank you for giving me motivation!

Posted: Sat Dec 28, 2013 12:03 pm
by behnam
Hi Amal,

So many thanks for your motivational post. It includes some nice points and some challenging questions.


[amal] wrote:Then why do you always say "ask Mohsen"?! Well, I will ask Mohsen... but why don't you speak and explain to us about your traditions?! why do you always feel that you aren't a part of that society?!
Obviously, each individual, in accordance with his/her skills, talents and interests, likes and dislikes, etc. is expert at some special and limited areas. Nobody can claim that s/he is expert in all areas. As far as I know, our friend Mohsen is an eagle-eyed person when it comes to social based issues. In addition, I'd like to motivate him to be more active, because I love reading his posts.
[amal] wrote:Dear, I heard that in Iran the government force the girls to wear the hejab, is that right?! Why should they do that?! what is the point behind this action?!
To be honest with you, I don't know whether the government or any other organization forces females to wear Hejab. My wife and all the ladies in my relatives wear Hejab, no matter if the government puts pressures on it or not. We are Muslim and we have been Muslim for years. I personally do believe in Hejab and this belief is not affected by the action of others. If all people in the world opposed the Islamic Hejab, I'd support it! I do mean what I am saying.

Let's assume that the government or some organizations put emphasize on wearing Hejab. I support them. We are living in an Islamic country, so we are supposed to follow the instructions of Islam. Thankfully, Hejab is clearly mentioned in the Holy Koran, so there is no rooms or excuses for misinterpretation.

In an Islamic society, women have to wear Hejab. If the don't cover their bodies, they threaten the mental health of the society. How? Well, men get excited by seeing sexual scenes while there is nowhere to satisfy their desires. In some countries sex industry is legal, so men welcome sexual excitement, because they easily can go to some legal places and do what they like by paying a little money. In an Islamic country, sex industry is illegal. For the sake of safety and health, Islamic rules about Hejab MUST be followed completely.

In my view, women who respect themselves and want me to respect them NEVER put her bodies on display. If they trigger my sexual desires without offering a solution for that, it will be like showing a glass of ice-water to a thirsty person in the summer and describing the quality of it! It is cruel. Even in forests, in wildlife animals do not do like that! If you are not going to give me a glass of water, at least don't remind my the water and its benefits. Don't make me more thirsty!
:lol: :lol: :lol:
[amal] wrote:The same thing happened when when we force a bad girl to wear the hejab, it will give a bad idea for others about it -especially for non-Muslims.
A bad girl may have some good tempting things! :lol: :lol: :lol: In this case, the philosophy of forcing her to cover her body is protecting others from danger, not that bad girl, although Hejab can be useful even for that bad girl too. :lol:

There are many social problems in the societies. Hejab is one of them. Sometimes, the authorities purposely close their eyes to important areas of life such as economy, corruption, health, unemployment, etc. and draw attention to some minor problems. This is not acceptable. An Islamic country MUST smell Islam in all areas.

I have to leave right now. I guess this topic is worth discussing more and deeper.

It was sad to hear that your grandmother is sick. I wish health to your grandmother. May Allah protect her from all illness.

All the best,
Behnam, 28 December, 2013

Richard Feynman’s Letter to His Departed Wife: “You, Dead, A

Posted: Mon Dec 30, 2013 6:46 am
by behnam
October 17, 1946

D’Arline,

I adore you, sweetheart.

I know how much you like to hear that — but I don’t only write it because you like it — I write it because it makes me warm all over inside to write it to you.

It is such a terribly long time since I last wrote to you — almost two years but I know you’ll excuse me because you understand how I am, stubborn and realistic; and I thought there was no sense to writing.

But now I know my darling wife that it is right to do what I have delayed in doing, and that I have done so much in the past. I want to tell you I love you. I want to love you. I always will love you.

I find it hard to understand in my mind what it means to love you after you are dead — but I still want to comfort and take care of you — and I want you to love me and care for me. I want to have problems to discuss with you — I want to do little projects with you. I never thought until just now that we can do that. What should we do. We started to learn to make clothes together — or learn Chinese — or getting a movie projector. Can’t I do something now? No. I am alone without you and you were the “idea-woman” and general instigator of all our wild adventures.

When you were sick you worried because you could not give me something that you wanted to and thought I needed. You needn’t have worried. Just as I told you then there was no real need because I loved you in so many ways so much. And now it is clearly even more true — you can give me nothing now yet I love you so that you stand in my way of loving anyone else — but I want you to stand there. You, dead, are so much better than anyone else alive.

I know you will assure me that I am foolish and that you want me to have full happiness and don’t want to be in my way. I’ll bet you are surprised that I don’t even have a girlfriend (except you, sweetheart) after two years. But you can’t help it, darling, nor can I — I don’t understand it, for I have met many girls and very nice ones and I don’t want to remain alone — but in two or three meetings they all seem ashes. You only are left to me. You are real.

My darling wife, I do adore you.

I love my wife. My wife is dead.

Rich.

PS Please excuse my not mailing this — but I don’t know your new address.

Richard Feynman’s Letter to His Departed Wife!

Posted: Mon Dec 30, 2013 7:17 am
by behnam
Hi friends,

Some people blame physicists for being cold and strict. In order to deny this false accusation, I am putting the letter of Richard Feynman to his dead wife! I leave the judgement to you.

In June 1945, the 27-year-old physicist Richard Feynman lost his wife, Arline Feynman, to tuberculosis. Only 25 years old, she was Richard’s high-school sweetheart. And yet she was much more. As Lawrence Krauss writes in 2012 biography on Feynman:


Richard and Arline were soul mates. They were not clones of each other, but symbiotic opposites – each completed the other. Arline admired Richard’s obvious scientific brilliance, and Richard clearly adored the fact that she loved and understood things he could barely appreciate at the time. But what they shared, most of all, was a love of life and a spirit of adventure.


October 17, 1946

D’Arline,

I adore you, sweetheart.

I know how much you like to hear that — but I don’t only write it because you like it — I write it because it makes me warm all over inside to write it to you.

It is such a terribly long time since I last wrote to you — almost two years but I know you’ll excuse me because you understand how I am, stubborn and realistic; and I thought there was no sense to writing.

But now I know my darling wife that it is right to do what I have delayed in doing, and that I have done so much in the past. I want to tell you I love you. I want to love you. I always will love you.

I find it hard to understand in my mind what it means to love you after you are dead — but I still want to comfort and take care of you — and I want you to love me and care for me. I want to have problems to discuss with you — I want to do little projects with you. I never thought until just now that we can do that. What should we do. We started to learn to make clothes together — or learn Chinese — or getting a movie projector. Can’t I do something now? No. I am alone without you and you were the “idea-woman” and general instigator of all our wild adventures.

When you were sick you worried because you could not give me something that you wanted to and thought I needed. You needn’t have worried. Just as I told you then there was no real need because I loved you in so many ways so much. And now it is clearly even more true — you can give me nothing now yet I love you so that you stand in my way of loving anyone else — but I want you to stand there. You, dead, are so much better than anyone else alive.

I know you will assure me that I am foolish and that you want me to have full happiness and don’t want to be in my way. I’ll bet you are surprised that I don’t even have a girlfriend (except you, sweetheart) after two years. But you can’t help it, darling, nor can I — I don’t understand it, for I have met many girls and very nice ones and I don’t want to remain alone — but in two or three meetings they all seem ashes. You only are left to me. You are real.

My darling wife, I do adore you.

I love my wife. My wife is dead.

Rich.

PS Please excuse my not mailing this — but I don’t know your new address.


*****************************************************************



}: }: }: }: }: }: }: }: }: }:

This can be called love!

All the best,
Behnam, 30 December, 2013

Why not?

Posted: Tue Dec 31, 2013 2:12 pm
by Elham
Why not?

I feel like writing. Why not? I used to write in this thread and although for some good reasons I stopped it, today again I feel like writing here. Part of me is in Let's learn together. Part of true me is in here and I can decide weather or not to write in it.

There are some thoughts in my mind right now. One of them is a question I'm asking myself :" How can we have opinions about things? " What makes us an opinionated person?"

Last night I watched " Casabelanca" . As I've heard it's a very famous movie.
What makes a film famous? I watched it, but if you ask me to give my opinion about it, I really don't know what to say. I just can say, it was good. I liked some of the features of the main character of the film. He was somehow serious and strict but full of emotion. I liked his personality as a "MAN"! I don't know what words I can use to describe him as a MAN but I just know he was attractive as a man.
But if you ask me about the story, I don't know how to talk about. So I wonder how I should be able to discuss sth?

I read a book today. I had heard about it. It's " kafe piano" ! after reading it , now, I wonder how I should judge it?

I think it needs experience.You should have read many books and watched too much movies and know many things to be able to have opinions about sth.

Anyway, right now I'm lack of enough information and experience to discuss things.


Dear Behnam has written about love. I think I'm familiar with love. I don't care what love is for in reality, or why god has created it, to make men and women make love and have babies or other things.
I just like to like it. Love is beautiful and makes life worth to live. I like love for itself and I'd like to believe love exists just for the sake of love. For those great feelings we have while we're in love. For the beauty and sweetness it adds to our lives. For the wonderful moments it creates between two persons. For sure love is a creator, a great creator.What dose it create? The good feelings that love brings with itself, the peace that it gives to our moments, the wonderful smell it spreads all over our life, most importantly the beauty of a great connection that loves makes between two heart, two soul and two body is a magic.

I love love and ask for more and more of it. Love is essence of life. I love to breath it. :-)
Nothing is comparable with liking some one deeply. No feeling is comparable with it when you some where deep down feel " you love some one" ! It warms your heart , soul and body and you don't want to change it with anything else in the world.

A baby can be the fruit of a beautiful love but I don't believe it's the reason for it. It may just be an ideal but I don't care. :-D


......

Happy New Year!

Posted: Tue Dec 31, 2013 5:29 pm
by behnam
Hi friends,

I'd like to say '
Happy New Year' to those use Gregorian calendar. I hope 2014 will bring more happiness, peace, health, and prosperity. I also hope you will make some good New Year Resolutions and will STICK to them! I wish you good luck and lasting happiness.

All the best,
Behnam, 31 December, 2013

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Tue Dec 31, 2013 9:05 pm
by Mohsen


Dear Amal,

I hope you and your family are in health

In fact the burden of explaining about dowry fell to me , well , I do it

First it is better to know what the dowry is, or what we speak about it as a dowry. We have two kinds of dowries, the dowry which is given to bride by bride groom' family and the dowry which is taken to bride groom house by bride's family.
The dowry which is on boy'charge is called Mehr ( mehrieh),it is written officially in a document as a marriage contract. That is included the following items

1-A copy of holy book ( Quran) ,
2- traditionally the amount of prophet 'daughter ( Hazarat Fatima) ,the dowry which Imam Ali (AS) gave to her wife ,as a blessing is inserted in this document.
3- A special Mirror
4- Gold , a set ( necklace ,bracelet ,earrings )
5- Pilgrimage to Mecca
6- The ownership of a house or a part of a house should be officially given to girl.

All of the articles in this document are negotiable and before the wedding ceremony , both families come to the agreement in amicably atmosphere.

It is better to know that in Iran marriage has two steps , first the girl and boy officially are registered as a wife and husband , in this step the the amount of dowry which is undertaken by boy fixed ,and it is written on a paper as a document ,the close relatives sign the document as witnesses . In this step relatives and friends from both families gather in big saloon and received by fruits , ice-cream, drinks , confectioneries , and special marriage contract cake.
Before the ceremony starts , the bride was taken to hairdresser salon and the bride groom decorate his car with flowers and pick up the bride from hairdresser salon and comes to the party .
During the ceremony bride and bride groom sit in special place and a clergy man invites the couple to declare their consent by addressing them some special words and sentences. After the bride answers positively , they are called wife and husband. Then the couple divided the cake ,the cake distributed among the people in saloon.

The dowry which is given by bride's family is called Tocher. The apparatuses and furniture which are taken by the bride to her husband's house is called "Tocher". This word is taken from Arabic word "jahaz" or "jahiziyeh"
The preparing bride's tocher is one of the most important things. Here under we are going to make a list of things that usually includes in the bride's tocher.
1) Bride and groom's bedroom furniture: It includes double bed, end tables, commode, dresser, bed sheets and pillow clothes. Some extra bedclothes, bed sheets and pillow covers for guest. Some bedclothes, bed sheets, and pillow covers for guest.
2) Proper curtains for each window for example: curtain for kitchen, bedrooms and living room.
3) Living room furniture, dinner table and chairs.
4) Carpet
5) Vacuum
6) Decorative things such as pictures, drawings and different statuettes.
7) Clock or horologe.
8) Library
9) Refrigerator (Refrigerator)
10) One set of chinaware and porelain dishes or plates
11) Washing machine
12) Gas burner (over)
13) One set of autoclave, stew pan and pan.
14) Crystal dishes for different purposes. Utensil and kitchenware.
15) Few sets of glasses
16) Tableware.
17) Samovar, and teapot. Plus a teaset
18) Set of spoon and fork
19) Sets of Fork and knife plus dessert plates.
20) Knife, colander and ladle
21) Water bottle, flask, cruse and glassware
22) Boxes of castor or condiment and spice boxes place for the tea, sugar, and sugar loaf 23) Kitchen apron and towels
24) Fridge Special utensils
25) Boskets and plastic dustbins in different sizes
26) Trencher and special boards for cutting meat and green vegetables
27) Electrical mill 28) Preparing boxes of legume, cereal, rice, spices, tea and sugar.
29) Rope for hanging cloths and clothespin.
30) Workbag, some colorful bobbins needle and scissors.
31) Separate towels for bride and groom
32) Necessary things for bath and washroom.
33) Few nightgowns and pajama plus various underwears for the bride
34) Towels 35) Iron and its cover
36) Crystal vases in different sizes.

The tocher is a conventional custom among the people , it is not obligatory , so the value of different ,it is cost from 10000$ to 1000000$ , it depends on the financial ability of girls family.
As I told you in Iran marriage has two steps , I explained about the first step , After the couple were called wife and husband , they don't live together until the second ceremony. It may takes between 3 months to 2 years. When the bride groom buys or rent his house , the bride's family send a person to that house to measure the doors and windows for curtain , the bride choose her curtain and they will be installed behind the doors and windows. Then a date is fixed for bringing all of tocher to the bride groom 's house.
Another wedding party will be hold and people invited for dinner . After finishing the party Bride and bride groom goes to their new house by riding their decorated car , and their family and relatives and friends follow them in their car , the make a lot of noise in the streets by horns of their car and finally throw the new couple in their new house to have the first night of life together.

It is a long story , it is 12.45 and I should go to bed , if you didn't get the story ,please feel free to ask me any detail
All the best
Mohsen

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Tue Dec 31, 2013 9:09 pm
by Mohsen
Good night Elham,

Welcome my friend , I don't know why you left us ,but I am happy to see your post.

Wish you the best
Mohsen

Hi, dear Behnam,Amal and Elham

Posted: Tue Dec 31, 2013 9:27 pm
by shahrubanu
I feel your great friendship in my heart deeply.I really like your friendship.Please forgive me I couldn t write here for a long time,because I m very busy.As you know,I have started to teach in a private school,working in here makes me very tired.I don t know what I m going to do }: I don t want to work in here anymore ,but I have to need regular salary.I haven t got time to read books,watch films or sign to internet.In brief, I have no time for my personal life.
I want to teach in a puplic school soon otherwise I will be a person who is out of life
I always need your friendships, I love your friendship.You create a beautiful place in my life..
All you are very precious for me ,please always hold this fact in your mind..
I wish all your dreams come true soon in this new year.I wish Allah always protects you..

Great love to my friends..


Shahrubanu

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2014 8:48 am
by arman
Hello! I have been away for long time and I would admit that I miss this forum. Anyway, I see this thread earlier and caught my attention. I like all posted discussion here. I read all threads here. It seems that all who posted here know each other well. Happy new year to all!

Welcome Elham!

Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2014 8:49 am
by behnam
Hi Elham,

It was very nice reading your post. Thank you very much for sharing your opinion with us. I appreciate it. There is no doubt that this thread is your home, and you have got a sense of belonging. You are most welcome!

My first post in 2014 is addressed to you. I hope we will write to each other regularly.

Hope to here from you soon.

All the best,
Behnam, 2 January, 2014

Hi Shahrbanu!

Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2014 9:00 am
by behnam
Hi Sharbanu,

It is always nice reading your posts. You are a great friend and a kind sister. I do love your kindness and care. Thank you very much for reading and posting. Thank you once again for your positive words. I am proud of you.

Happy New Year to you and to your family! I wish you lasting happiness and success. I hope 2014 will bring happiness and prosperity to all people, specially to you.

I hope to read more from you.

All the best,
Behnam, 2 January, 2014

Hi Arman!

Posted: Thu Jan 02, 2014 9:05 am
by behnam
Hi Arman,

Welcome to this thread and thank you so much for reading the posts and putting comments. Thank you once again for joining us. I hope we will help each other with practicing English through writing. Please do not hesitate to write in this thread. I am sure, my friends and I will welcome your posts with open arms. Please participate in discussion.

I hope to hear more from you.

All the best,
Behnam, 2 January, 2014

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Fri Jan 03, 2014 7:40 pm
by Mohsen
Dear friends,

The Islamic calendar is reckoned from the time of migration (Hijra) of Prophet Mohammad (Peace Be Upon Him) from Mecca to Madina. At the first night of Rabi al-Awwal, twelve years after the outset of his Divine Mission, the Holy Prophet migrated from Makkah to al-Madenah, This was considered as the starting point for Islamic year ,but it was changed to month of Moharam. Some people believe that this changing was happened at the time Ammar Khatab , and some people say that it was changed at the time of Bani Omaieh era .
I would like to congratulate my Muslim friends for coming of Rabi al-Awwal, I should say happy new year to people who use Islamic calendar.

All the best,
Mohsen

Elham Speaks Beautifully!

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 6:01 am
by behnam
Hi friends,

Last night I had an online English class with an American teacher on Skype. Actually, the accent of teacher was American, I am not sure about his nationality. He says he lives in America. Anyway, forget where he is from, that's not a big deal. At class time, I was chatting with Elham. I asked her to take part in the class and she kindly agreed.

It was great to be with Elham in a class. I really enjoyed it. Elham speaks English fluently, nicely, and beautifully. She has got a very beautiful accent. Her accent was better than the teacher's accent, that's to say, she speaks English like native speakers. To be honest, I felt jealous of her English! Elham was impressive, that is why I am impressed with her way of speaking English, and that is why I am writing these things(I might not write! {-: :lol: {-: ). I hope she will help me with speaking English.

My accent is not good. It is a bad mixture of Azerbaijani, Farsi, and British English! Sometimes, I record my voice and play it. I hate listening to my own voice. I speak like a robot. My voice isn't soft! What should I do? }: }: }: }: }:

All the best,
Behnam, 5 January, 2014

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 12:03 pm
by Moroo
Hi Elham

How are you, how is life treating you.

I like your last post so much specially world " LOVE ", love is everything in the world, who can live without love, without love we are robots.

Best of LOVE.

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 1:09 pm
by Moroo
Dear, Behnam and Amal

How are you Amal and how is beautiful Syria,

Sorry I stopped watching the news because as people we play a role in a story someone else put the scenario.

I read your post which you were talking about hejab as well as Behnam's reply.

I'm Muslim but I believe that hejab is NOT obligatory :!!:

Most of Muslims caring about how they and their families look ( hejab, beard, Jilbab,…etc) but they don't even think about the most important thinks which is inside not outside.

I learned from the countries who forced the people to do something that it makes the opposite result.

Sorry for my short posts because it's a little bit hard for me to write long sentences.

Happy new year to all my friends

Re: Let's learn together!

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 5:21 pm
by Elham
Dear Behnam,

That's very kind of you to write those compliments on my speaking. You've exaggerated about it. {-;

You know, I even don't remember when I had last spoken English. It was a long time I hadn't spoken. I was stressed If I can speak, but luckily I could put some words together and make some meaningful sentences. :lol:

My accent is good, I like it myself , but my knowledge of English is poor, good accent is worth nothing without being able to talk!

Your English is great. You can easily express yourself, your knowledge of English is really great.To be honest I'm jealous of your English.Your accent is not bad at all! It's not perfect but it's not bad.

And as we both know, what matters is English itself not accent. The first important thing while evaluating some one's English is his ability to makes right sentences and get his message across. Accent comes next. So we come into this conclusion that you are the winner {-;

By the way, I'd be so glad if we could come to a deal, what? To combine your great knowledge of English and my accent and make sth PERFECT. Deal?

All the best
Eli

Let's judge after carefully considering the facts!

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 6:38 pm
by behnam
Moroo wrote:I learned from the countries who forced the people to do something that it makes the opposite result.
Hi Moroo,

It is nice hearing from you. Thank you very much for following us.

I wish you had written clearly which countries force people to wear Hejab, and what is meant by 'opposite result'.

Moroo wrote:Most of Muslims caring about how they and their families look ( hejab, beard, Jilbab,…etc) but they don't even think about the most important thinks which is inside not outside.
What is that important thing inside? :lol: :lol: :lol:

Fortunately, Hejab is clearly stated in the holy Koran; [نور/31], [احزاب/59], [نور/30], [احزاب/53].
What people do or believe cannot change the opinion of God about something. When it comes to making decision about important matters, God isn't democratic. He doesn't care about the nature or the habit of people. If all people in the world get naked and support nudism God will not change His opinion about Hejab!

I respect your views and other friends' views, but we have to take everything into consideration before making our judgement. We have to carefully consider the facts. For example, we have to think about these questions: 1) What has caused some people to get interested in gay marriage? 2) Where is the origin of HIV and what makes it epidemic in the world? 3) What destroys or threatens the foundation of families in all nations? 4) We(men and women) are human beings, why do women have a tendency to put their bodies on display? 5) Who makes decision about the amount of body someone can put on show? 6) What are the negative and the positive sides of nudism?

I hope to hear from you soon.

All the best,
Behnam, 5 January, 2014

I do agree with your suggestion!

Posted: Sun Jan 05, 2014 6:57 pm
by behnam
Elham wrote:I'd be so glad if we could come to a deal, what? To combine your great knowledge of English and my accent and make sth PERFECT. Deal?
Hi Elham,

Many thanks for being complimentary about my English knowledge. That's very kind of you to say good things about my English. I welcome your suggestion with open arms. That's very generous of you to offer the deal I am looking for. Thank you very much indeed.

I am very much interested in making the deal you have announced. I am ready to sign it if you are serious. This is a golden opportunity for me, and I know such opportunities seldom knock the door twice. :lol: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 5 January, 2014