Let's learn together!

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mortaza
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby mortaza » Thu Oct 18, 2012 9:35 am

Dear Behnam,

My heartiest congratulations to you and your wife for your new born babies!! And I am glad that you are all fine. I hope you have a happy life together forever. Tell me my brother! what did you exactly do that God has given to you a twins {-;

behnam wrote:. . .
I feel like a father. I feel I am getting older...
. . .
The babies were born by caesarean. I am also happy about it! Well, you know....

This shows, my friend, that not only you are not getting older but you are getting younger and younger. But be more careful Behnam! Next time God may give you a triples {-:

Dear Behnam! I can tell you that those calm and tranquil nights that you and your wife have had is now over! Make yourself ready for not sleeping during nights. To make you aware of their needs, babies just cry! And it is you (as their parents) that should translate their cryings! I should confess that I have not been able to response quickly and correctly to my children's cryings! Sometimes, I have no idea why the baby is crying!!

About your post, of course I noticed it, and I read it twice carefully! Believe it or not, I also made a print of it on a paper for future use! It is very helpful. Why I had not answered you? Well, my wife and my daughter have gone to Mashhad since last Friday. Amirali -- my sone -- couldn't go with them because he is a student and he should go to school during the week. So, I am now both a father and a mother for him! I have to cook, to wash, to clean the house, etc. I also have to wake him up early on the mornings and feed him breakfast, and make him ready for school. When he came back from school, I have to be at home and give him lunch! I have to take care of his homework! Don't get me wrong! I don't do his homework, I just make sure that he does it.

You see! I have been very busy. Tomorrow, my wife will come back and, hopefully, I would be free a little.

Thanks for reading,

All the bast,
mortaza

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mortaza
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby mortaza » Thu Oct 18, 2012 9:50 am

Dear Elham,

How are you my friend? Is everything well? I hope you remember me from English-at-Home! You are here and you read all these posts, but you don't write very often! You don't write as much as you used to write. I feel that you just write when you feel it is necessary! This is just to say that I enjoy reading your posts very much and I want you to write more. By the way, thank you very much for gathering together all those posts in English-at-Home, into some PDF files.

Hope to read from you soon.

All the best,
mortaza

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[amal]
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby [amal] » Thu Oct 18, 2012 12:22 pm

Oh dear Behnam, I am really really happy for you. Congratulations!! This is such wonderful news that your new babies have arrived healthy.

Finally!!!! I am an aunt... WOOOOOOOOOOOOW {-:

I am glad that the babies were born by caesarean, at least you wont nag when chatting with me. {-; :lol:
Haha, just kidding... :roll:

Come on man! What are you saying?!!! You aren't getting older, you still as naughty as I know you... And.. Emm :oops: even more. :lol:

Wish you all a happy life and may they fill your heart with joy.

Please take care of your wife and send her my kisses.

Best wishes,
Amal

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nanachen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby nanachen » Thu Oct 18, 2012 2:28 pm

Dear Behnam,

Congratulations!You got two sons?It is fabulous!The god gave you two gifts one time.I can't wait to see the picture about your wife,Mehran and Mehradad.You will be a good father.
What's your plan?You and your wife bring up your twins or you need your parents' help or you need to hire a baby sitter?

Hope you , your wife ,your sons are healthy and happy.

Nana

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Oriani
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Oriani » Thu Oct 18, 2012 3:50 pm

My dear Behnam: CONGRATULATIONS!!

You're such a lucky man. Thank GOD your twins are healthy as well as your wife. God bless your family.

Once again, congratulations.

Elham
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Elham » Thu Oct 18, 2012 4:32 pm

Dear Mortaza,

Oh, please accept my apology. I had to say hi to you much sooner than this. ( Lotfan ozre mano bepazirid! :oops: ) I've read all of your posts and I was looking for a suitable time to write to you. Thank you very much for providing this opportunity for me tonight! {-; :-D

That's very kind of you to mention me; thanks for your positive words about my posts. Yes, I'm not as active as before for some reasons, but I never miss reading posts.

To be honest, I enjoy reading your posts a lot. I love it when you write about your family, your wife and your children. Through your lines, I do feel your love for your family and it makes me feel happy for you. You seem to be a very kind husband and father and I feel your sense of responsibilty as a father. Congratulations dear Mortaza* :-D

Please continue writing your posts and essayes, I enjoy reading them a lot.

Oh do you remember our posts about my cousin whome her husband had remarried? I clearly remember your nice attention and support about that topic! :-)

Thanks for reading,

Wish you and your family the best,
Elham

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WiLZiN
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby WiLZiN » Thu Oct 18, 2012 4:41 pm

CongratulationsCongratulationsCongratulationsCongratulationsCongratulationsCongratulations
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Congratulations.....Hi Behnam..............................................................Congratulations
Congratulations.....How are you and your small family?...............................Congratulations
Congratulations.....Thanks Allah for their safety... I am very happy for you.....Congratulations
Congratulations.....A father... What a wonderful ward with many emotional....Congratulations
Congratulations.....meanings and dimensions... Oh my dear... You worth it.....Congratulations
Congratulations.....When I read this news I had tow feeling... The first one.....Congratulations
Congratulations.....was happiness for you my older brother to being a father...Congratulations
Congratulations.....and the second one was heartbreak because I am not a......Congratulations
Congratulations.....father yet... I am very eager to be a father like you..........Congratulations
Congratulations.....I ask Allah to be all yours days well and full of love and.....Congratulations
Congratulations.....happiness to the end of life with the true faith in Allah......Congratulations
Congratulations.....With my love and respect...........................................Congratulations
Congratulations.....WiLZiN...................................................................Congratulations
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[amal]
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby [amal] » Fri Oct 19, 2012 12:22 pm

Hi friends,

I want to tell you a story happened with me two days ago...

Two days ago I decided to call an old friend who I wasn't in touch long time ago to congratulate her on her new baby but of course that was too late cause I am lazy in making phone calls and the situation here prevent me from calling...

However, I did the call and I was very happy cause I heard her voice and we talked normally.. I congratulate her and asked her if she and her family are OK and if the situation is calm in their area... Then suddenly she stopped and said: Amal! Didn't you know?!

She told me that her husband who had a cancer, died a month ago. :!!:
In fact, I was verrrry shocked and didn't know what to tell her, I just said may god bless him then she started to tell me how he died and what happened with them before that and she was crying and her voice was very tired, I really wished I could go to her and hug her. :-( :-( :-(

Uh! I know her feelings, although his death was expected but losing a dear person is really hard, I am really sad for her and her kids. :-(
That is really sorrowful, she lost her beloved and now she has two kids who will grow up without their father and she has to raise them alone, it's really a great duty.

At that night, I couldn't sleep at all, I really wanted to cry but I couldn't, I don't know why!!!!!!!!!!!!! :!!: :-(

May God help her and give her patience.

Thanks for reading.
I hope God keep you and your families healthy and happy.

Amal

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Mohsen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Mohsen » Fri Oct 19, 2012 4:56 pm

Dear Behnam,

I would like to offer my congratulations to you for having babies. The twines that you were given in the holy month of Zil hajj is the blessing from God to you. I really happy to hear that, it was also coincidence with the wedding anniversary of Imam Ali AS and Fatima AS, on the same day prophet Mohammad (PBUH put the hand of his only daughter to the hands of Imam Ali. We had happy ceremonies during last week, and it was completed with the football news , Iran soccer team defeated south Korea , while Iran was playing with ten people after one of Iran football player got the red card.

Now you have shouldered the responsibility for being a good father, please offer my congratulation to your wife as well. You have many guests at home who have come to visit the babies, they surly give your wife valuable gifts. I think from now on you have not enough time to be here beside your friends and this is your babies 's right who ask for their father to perform his duty.
Do you agree with me :cry: :cry:
Good Luck
Mohsen

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Mohsen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Mohsen » Fri Oct 19, 2012 5:37 pm

Dear Nana,
I appreciate if you send me the address of a useful site to show the list of companies which take part in Canton Fair, Thanks you ,my Email address is : mohbon@gmail.com.

There is a beautiful historical bridge in Isfahan ,called Pol Khajo, you can see it via Google Images. On Friday mornings some people who assumed they have good voice gather under the bridge and sing together. There is a nice architectural room under the bridge which causes the sound echoes. So when a person start to sing ,his voice seems very well , he enjoy singing and people like to hear his song.

I remember that Behnam wrote a lot about polygamy at the previous forum. I have not seen a man with two wives till now around me. It was something in traditional families. But generally a man was able to choose another wife, when he got his first wife's permission.So you see getting the first wife 's permission is not possible.

You told me that I could buy that lady if I had money ,but I can't believe that a lady is sold by money.. are you joking? :-o :-o

B.Wishes
Mohsen

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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Elham » Fri Oct 19, 2012 7:04 pm

Dear Amal,

How are you honey? Hope you are feeling better now.

You have heard such a very very sad news and I do feel your emotions my dear. What could you say to her?! Oh, if I were you I really didn't know how to react, just like you!
Oh poor your friend... nothing is worth than missing a beloved one, specially a husband for a woman! It's the saddest disaster in a woman's life! :-( :-( :-( :-(

May god help her to tolerate this very difficult situation and give her strength to continue bravely!

Wish to hear happy news from you soon next time,

Elham

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Mohsen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Mohsen » Sun Oct 21, 2012 1:43 pm

Dear Friends,

For a week I am away from you , I take a trip to Mashad . This was my brother who invited me to have a travel together and I accepted it ,because I believe in destiny , maybe my fate destined to be beside of holy shrine of Imam Reza during important days of Arafeh and Eid al Adha . Here I take this opportunity to wish the best for all you and congratulate my Muslim friends for coming of Eis al Adha. May I bothered some of you by my words ,please forgive me from bottom of your heart.

Good Luck
Mohsen

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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby WiLZiN » Sun Oct 21, 2012 1:57 pm

Hi Amal...

How are you my dearest dear?!


I'm so sad to know is shucking news. May Allah bliss and forgive him.
When I was at 7th class in school, I knew that one of my classmate has a very painful crash on the road between Damascus and Homs. Her father had died wail she had dangerous Injuries.
I received the news wail I was having my dinner, In that time I stopped eating and went to my room and I started to cray. I forgot the problems between us and forgave her for all what she did against me.

Amal, your tears are very precious and I feel what you feel. You have a sensitive lovely clean heart and I proud to be one of your friends.


Yours sincerely...

- WiLZiN -

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behnam
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby behnam » Sun Oct 21, 2012 2:16 pm

Hi friends,

You cannot imagine how happy I was when I read your kind messages. Some people sent me e-cards. I'd like to express my sincere thanks to all friends for their kindness and care towards me. I am really a lucky person, since I've got some valuable treasures. In fact, my friends are real treasures.

I'm sure you are interested in hearing about babies and their mother. Thankfully,they are very well. As my Iranian friends know, in Iran, when a lady gives birth, her mother and sisters help her with chores and looking after babies for 10 days. Obviously, mothers and sisters prefer their own home to in-laws' home. Therefore, for 10 days new mother and the baby(babies in my case! :lol: ) receive service at her father's home. After 10 days, they give babies a wash and throw a name-giving party. New father's early family participate in both washing and name-giving processes too. Before giving name, an old member of families( an experienced person of two families who plays the role of leader among them) tells Azan and Eghame in the right and left ear of babies respectively.*

After the party and giving name, the mother and her baby come to their own home. In some cases, they stay at father's home for 40 days. It depends on many factors, e.g. the distance of family's home from each other, the closeness between two families, the workplace of parents, the social level of families, the behaviour of new father, etc. There is no fixed rules for this ceremony.

In my case, you should know, I wanted my wife to stay at her father's home for 40 days(I didn't say 'I allowed her to stay..'! :lol: ). That's easy and safe for her and the babies. To be honest, it is easier for me too. I am terrible at babysitting. :lol:

I was with them until Friday morning. I caught a nasty cod. Because of catching cold, I had to leave them alone. In fact, they forced me to leave them for the sake of health and safety. :lol: These days, I am alone at home. There is nobody to cook me, to nurse me, to massage me, to care about me! I am not cruel at all. Well, I've done my work! Now, it is their responsibility to look after babies. You should know, giving a lady the chance of being the mother of two sons isn't an easy task! It takes a lot of efforts and attempts. :lol: :oops: If it was easy, Mohsen could do it too! :lol: :lol: :lol: :oops:

Joking aside, in my opinion, women's roles in life is much more important than men's roles! Honestly speaking, we men must confess that we do nothing compared with what ladies carry out in life. Sincerely speaking, women are much more capable and effective than men. I really felt embarrassed, and I still feel guilty of being ineffective in comparison with my wife. Why is she under that much stress, pain, pressure, difficulties? Why is she under that much responsibilities? Just because of being a lady creates so many responsibilities, difficulties, problems, troubles, etc for her! This is not fair. I don't know whether these duties and responsibilities are given to her by nature(their natural talents) or by men! I don't know, but I am sure life-based tasks are not distributed fairly. There is no balance between men and women's responsibilities in life. I guess, throughout the history men have been selfish and cruel.

Some friends have asked me about my feelings and the future. As all fathers, I am happy. On the other hand, I feel as if a heavy load is put on my back. This new role will affect my life both negatively and positively. For example, it will affect my work negatively, since I have to divide my attention.

We haven't finalized our decision about employing a nurse. I personally agree with it, but my wife disagrees!!!

Dear friends, Elham, Mohsen, Amal, Mortaza, Nana, Wilzin, Oriani...thank you very much for your friendly messages. I'd have replied you individually, but unfortunately, I am pressed for time. I really love reading your posts and writing to you. I do feel proud of you.

I wish you happy moments in life. Thank you very much indeed.


All the best,
Behnam, 21 October, 2012

* [Azan and Eghame are two National Anthems of Islam(Shiite group].



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setayesh
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby setayesh » Sun Oct 21, 2012 3:50 pm

WoOoOoW!!!

Congratulations Behnam!!!!!

How are you new father?I hope you and your family are fine.
my happiness is out of imagination.I REALLY REALLY don't know how to express my congratulations and best wishes for you. I often check the thread although rarely write.But today I couldn't help writing to you when I found the news about the babies.

I wish you,your wife and specially twins; health,happiness and sweet moments in life.

yours,
Setayesh

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[amal]
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby [amal] » Mon Oct 22, 2012 7:46 am

Hi Elham,

How are you? How do you spend your days?

Thanks dear for your care and wishes for my friend and me. Thank God I am better but since I heard that news till now, I think of her everyday and pray for her.
You are right dear, missing a husband is the saddest disaster in a woman's life, especially for my friend, you can't imagine how much she loved him. May God help her! :-(

Dear, as you told me yesterday the weather was rainy in Iran as it was here in Syria, are you happy with the rain? Don't you think that it's too early for it?! Do you believe that this winter will be colder than the past years?

Hi Wilzin,

How are you?

Thanks for your care about me and thanks for your support.

Your story really made me sad.. lossing a father isn't an easy thing too. { الله يحفظ و يخلي أبي و أبوك}

Emm, my friend, although you are sensitive and you always tell me about your feelings and some emotional stories but I don't know why I found this post is different. I felt that your writing style was like someone I know.. So what's going on?! :lol: {-;

Dear friends,

While I was reading Wilzin post, some questions came to my mind and I really love to hear your opinions and your answers about them, the questions are:

If someone hurt you, what would you do?! Would you forget and forgive after a while? Or would you stil remember the situation but you forgive the person and deal normaily with them?!

If you had a chance in the future to hurt that person back, would you take the opportunity? Do you think that getting revenge makes your pain less?

Looking forward to hear from you all.

Best wishes.
Amal

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WiLZiN
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby WiLZiN » Mon Oct 22, 2012 11:59 pm

Hi Amal...

How are you my dearest dear ?!


Oh my dear I didn't wrote the last post to make you sad, Please forgive me.
As an answer to your questions: If that person was a dear to me, I would forgave him/her and forgot after a while. But if not may be I couldn't forgot, It depends on the action and its consequences.
Have nice days full of happiness, peace of mind, relaxing, and love from all the depths of your heart.


Yours sincerely...

- WiLZiN -

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behnam
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby behnam » Wed Oct 24, 2012 12:40 pm

Hi Setayesh,

Thank you very much for your friendly message. That's very kind of you not to forget your old pen-pals.

It was very nice to hear about your great success in studying MA at your favourite university. You deserve it. According to what your sister wrote, you've got a part-time job in a bank. This a great chance to get familiar with workplaces and earn money. I am sure you are excellent at money making. :lol: Congratulations on both; working and studying in your desired field.

How is Sara? I hope she is fine. Give my warmest regards to her and tell her I said hi.

Thank you for following the thread.

All the best,
Behnam, 24 October, 2012


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behnam
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby behnam » Wed Oct 24, 2012 2:06 pm

If someone hurt you, what would you do?! Would you forget and forgive after a while? Or would you stil remember the situation but you forgive the person and deal normaily with them?!

If you had a chance in the future to hurt that person back, would you take the opportunity? Do you think that getting revenge makes your pain less?

Looking forward to hear from you all.

Best wishes.
Amal


Hi Amal,

How are you? I hope you are happy and healthy.

It is autumn and time for ladies to review their memories. :lol: Time for walking under the slight rain and breaking dry leaves. Time for enjoying the colourful scenery. I wish you happy moments.

Your questions are quite difficult. That's not easy to give them proper answers. However, thanks to the rich documents in Islam, there is a way to start dealing with such emotion-based questions. {-:

Imam Ali has said,"The pleasure of forgiveness is greater than the pleasure of revenge!" A very short look at this meaningful sentence shows people often take revenge for getting pleasure! However, we may not know that forgiving makes our heart relaxed and comfortable, while seeking revenge makes our heart heavy and our mind busy. By the way, after taking revenge, we are always in danger of receiving revenge from others. This process may be repeated, since we are not the last person who looks for a way to punish someone. As you know, in the past, Arab people used to fight for years. Fighting was their main job. The main reason of those fights was revenging! Our prophet Mohammad stopped them from fighting, by teaching them how to forgive others. Forgiveness results in friendship, and sincere friendship results in Islamic Empire after 23 years. Oh, what a big job!

Dear Amal, many people give speech, but a few of them practise what they preach! Speaking about forging is easy in theory, but it is very difficult in practice.

For me, it depends of the kind of offense and the amount of harm someone does on me! In the serious cases, I punish the offenders severely. However, in less important matters, I forget and forgive easily. I seldom seek revenge for people who make mistakes. I am also very kind with my friends. I am patient with them. I rarely break a friendship, but if I find out that a friend or even someone from my early family or close relatives is trying to fool me, I may allow them to fool me once. However, if they think of me as an easy prey, so their misinterpretation may tempt them to fool me twice, in this case, I punish them severely! Oh my God, how ridiculous their faces become after seeing a lion in a cottage, where they had thought to be empty! :lol: :lol: :lol:

There is a nice saying 'your fool me once, shame on you. You fool me twice, shame on me'! We shouldn't let someone fool us twice. This is extremely important in human beings' relationships.

Everybody has got thresholds as well as red lines. It is very good to have high thresholds, but I don't recommend wide lines. Our red lines must be as narrow and sharp as possible. Someone may mistakenly passes our red lines. That isn't a serious threat. But, if they don't respect our borders, nothing can stop them like a severe punishment.

Your questions come from another field which is womanish. I don't know about their philosophy in life. However, let me tell you something too direct. If a person has fooled you and has hurt your feelings, either forgive him or punish him; but how? There are positive ways for punishing. You can study hard to get a degree, then can work, then marry someone and try your best to have a happy life with successful children. The greater success, the severer punishment! In the contrary, hatred and keeping your mind busy lead to misery. In this case, you are punishing yourself not the offenders.

The final point is your worry about forgetting. Human beings never forget. The events are saved in brain cells. We may refer to them rarely, but they are there forever. Human beings get used to things. They never forget them. Therefore, if you haven't forgotten something bad related to the past, don't worry. It is almost the same with all people. Try to make yourself busy with other things. It will make you refer to the cells rarely. The more hobbies, the less scan of the brain, the less pain!

I hope you will mange to change your mood from negative to positive soon. Rely on God!


All the best,
Behnam, 24 October, 2012



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[amal]
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby [amal] » Thu Oct 25, 2012 1:48 pm

Happy Eid to all Muslims friends wish you happy days!
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Elham » Thu Oct 25, 2012 2:26 pm

Hi dear Amal,

Happy Eid to you and your family* :-)

It's not soon for the rain fall honey. It's the second month of the autumn and lots of rain falls are expected. I hope so.

About your questions...! I have this habit to express my sadness when some one hurts me. I don't keep silent , I believe this is his right to know it. I let the person know what he has done. Maybe that person doesn't know and hasn't understood that he's made mistake. If the person understands me and my pain, he's done me the biggest favor he could, and I feel calm and relaxed ;I am sooooooo grateful of him! :-D
If not, he hurts me for the second time and leaves a scar on my heart and soul! It should be mentioned that it matters how important the person and the matter is to me! In this case I just wait and hope as time passes, he would think about it, understand it and feel regret! That's enough for me! Instead of hearing " please forgive me" I do prefer to make sure that there is no misunderstanding anymore and the person is aware of his mistakes!

anyway,I try to forgive. I can't claim I forget easily, no , I can't. Somewhere in my mind it remains , if it wasimportant,but I never think of revange! Never!

You know Amal, this bothers me more when I myself has hurt or annoyed some one! I can forgive others easily but when it comes to my own mistakes I punish myself and never forgive Elham! Knowing someone is sad with me is much more painful that being sad and hurt from others!

Thanks for reading!

Elham


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