We are all basically selfish.

Monthly topics for discussion

Moderator: TalkingPoint

Katherine,Guest

Re: Is everybody selfish or not?

Postby Katherine,Guest » Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:05 am

Gleb wrote:
Maryam wrote:hello girls & guys.
mothers and fathers can not be selfish.
I am selfish with my family,especially with my mother
She gives me every thing,but I give her nothing.
.On the other hand, I am full with love And sacrifises with my husband & his family.
I dont like selfishnes ,so I am trying 2 not be selish.


i dont fully agree with you, its really difficult to speak about selfish things in family. Its normal that your mother give everything to you and you give her nothing. It happens in every family but you should give your mother attention and your love, its the most important thing for parents.

its really difficult not to be selfish and i have an opinion that every person is selfish! So even if you if you try not to be selfish person its impossible to do it! Because any person like himself or herself the most! and it will be forever!!!!!!!!!!!! :wink: :wink: :wink:




GleBBBaaaBBBaaa=)

Sasha

Re: Re : is everybody selfish

Postby Sasha » Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:05 am

[quote="annie"]People is selfish in nature basically . But we live in a big community, sometime it is unexpected to encounter some trouble , if we give him/her a hand , maybe will make him/her better. for the time he or she only a word of "THANK" to you at most ,and not repay you anything . But next time when you meet trouble , maybe another body will help you generously . It's so natural and common seeing -A KIND OF GOOD NATURE CYCLE . So people's action can change the nature . " Try to do more for others , then you will get more repay from them ." Do'n't be too selfish .[/quote

I think that your opinion is right because it is really so.For example when a person has a trouble .he or she expects some help from other people,and it is very good when you get it. But it depends on people,because all people are different and sometimes they do not know if to take his or her help or not.My own opinion is that all people should not be selfish ,if they are ,they will never be able to get that balance they want.So help each other and do not think only about yourself! And try to help people even if you do not like it very much .Otherwise you will never get any help in response.

Gleb

selfish

Postby Gleb » Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:06 am

Katherine,Guest wrote:
selfish wrote:"We are all basically selfish" is a truth, it's been believed by our human. But many people don't like being describled as selfishness by others.
There are two conditions:
One is that I am really selfish, I have never thought about anythings for others only for myself. And I am angry when I heard I was selfish and blamed by someone living around me. Because I think it is my right to care or not, why I need do it for you?
This kind of man will not be respected and accept by other people.

The other one is I think and do many things for you. But it's regarded as harmness, even to be said selfishness. In this condition, I will be unhappy or sad. The opinion to help others will be moved or disappeared.
So we should understand each other and take care more of others.
If we are all think so, we are not regarded as selfish man. :D :lol:



:) I agree with u:) we are all selfish in our life:) and it's has been created for us:)=people:) as for me I 'm selfish but only sometimes for example when I have bad spirit:)
and of crs we should take care of our relatives and friends:) and then they won't consider us to be selfish:) :D

I absolutely agrre with you! 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)

Alison. guest

is everybody selfish

Postby Alison. guest » Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:07 am

annie wrote:People is selfish in nature basically . But we live in a big community, sometime it is unexpected to encounter some trouble , if we give him/her a hand , maybe will make him/her better. for the time he or she only a word of "THANK" to you at most ,and not repay you anything . But next time when you meet trouble , maybe another body will help you generously . It's so natural and common seeing -A KIND OF GOOD NATURE CYCLE . So people's action can change the nature . " Try to do more for others , then you will get more repay from them ." Do'n't be too selfish .


:wink: I agree with Annie`s opinion, we should help people, give them a hand, but it`s obviously that if we do sth good to a good perso it`ll be valued, but if we do sth good to a bad person it`ll be wasted. :!:
:P We should care of ourselves more to prevent abusing with our generosity
:) and to give it to someone who is really worth it.Crs life is sometimes cruel & it can surprise you with some dissappointments. :!:
So be careful & live YOUR life. :P [/b]

Tanya,guest

Re: yes

Postby Tanya,guest » Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:09 am

Cassy wrote:8) That's true. even when we do smth good for others we expect them to smth good for us. we do not say so but in our inner world we believe in it. there is no person in the world not being selfish!




Our selfishness is one of the main our features that helps us to survive today.I agree.But is it interesting to live all the time for ourselves? Don't you want to get pleasant emotions & feelings from people who surround you?I think we are selfish only because it's convinient for us,it's borring.

vicki

Postby vicki » Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:10 am

The Good balance wrote:Of course we are Selfish.

But in the same time we are full with Love,Self-Sacrifice.

And i imagine our life is like performance on the steel-rope

Looking for Balance.

We know people accumulate all their life money,titles,property

But are Unhappy !

And other thoughtlessly giving all they have !

The Balance is difficult,i know !!!


I like the opinion about the good balance because when I was reading
that message I was surprised by the fact that your opinion is like mine!
To my mind, a person can not be absolutely selfless. But everyone should know the limit. I think we should help our nearest and dearest. One should first decide if a person is worth helping or not. Do not waste yourself on somebody who is not worth it! :wink:









Do not waste yourself on somebody who is not worth it.

Guest

Postby Guest » Thu Dec 18, 2003 8:11 am

Chivalry wrote:Well if we are not living for ourselves then who are we living for. Life is a gift to us, ourselves as individuals. There is a balance I believe you must find to truly live the way you are supposed to.

To be overly selfish and not care about others is wrong. But then again to be selfless is also wrong. Being totally selfless will only result in you being bound to the will of others. A slave if you will, in some ways at least.

For example: It is a known fact among people who know me that I will go out of my way for anyone if they ask. My car is the best example. I will give anyone (of my friends) at say a social event who needs a lift home just that. On the first offer it was received with much thanks. Similarly the second time. After that people began to see my kindness as their right not merely something I have done for them. They even go so far as offering other people lifts in my car without asking me for a lift themselves, just assuming I will. They turn up to parties just assuming the I'll give them a lift. Invite me someplace, and later mention I am driving. When I can't they get offended, after all how dare I. I owe them the kindness.


So you see selflessness is also bad. Balance is what you need. Selfless and selfish acts are a part of nature. To be truly happy you go somewhere in between.


Ok. I understand the opinion of Chivalry. I should say that she is quite kind person, but other people just abuse her kindness. Of course, it hurts. People should keep to the middle, do not be too radical. You must not be selish in relation to your closest people.Nobody, but them, will help you in difficult situations and nobody, but them, will take care of you.MIND THIS(of course, there are some exceptions). So everybody should decide himself whether he wants to be selfish or not. :)

yasmin

selfishness

Postby yasmin » Sun Dec 21, 2003 10:48 am

selfishness is urge from within each & every individual . but do u think selfishness word implies only to the money or the time & care u give to others.
v can't be selfish all the time b'coz it 's human nature our moods are different at times v will be happy ,sad , angry ,sober ,gentle & many more emotions r embibe within each of us.
when u r in good mood , u don't tend to be selfissh but u try to me helpful to others & would like to share ur happiness with everyone but if u r proudy person then u try to look upon other as inferior & u make people think that u r the only one who is happy in this world.
when ur in bad mood , u will not have any inclination towards helping others & u think u r the one who needs the help most .at the same time person can be selfish to himself by hiding his sorrows & worries with others
u can't say urself that i am not a selfish person if u do a charity work
but u should also take care of others feelings
i don't know whether i m correct in describing this topic if anybody has suggestions . please reply .

mickey_clauss
New Member
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Jun 19, 2004 12:36 am
Location: México
Contact:

Sometimes to be selfish it's necessary

Postby mickey_clauss » Wed Jun 30, 2004 3:33 pm

I agree about we are basically selfish.
I believe that sometimes a person have to be selfish because he needs to obtain something.
For example, when you want to get a promotion in your job, you wont think about other people, only in yourself.
But, in my opinion, to be selfish depending of your age, the people who are around you and the achievements that you want to get.
However, it's very important take care about other people if you want that people think in yourself.
:wink:

Guest

Postby Guest » Tue Jul 13, 2004 1:16 am

People are selfish. Some are more selfish than others. That's all. The selfishness also depends on situations. One shouldn't be selfish when he/she can help others, but if the situation is out of his/her hands, then he/she shouldn't help. Not helping in that kinda situations is not being selfish. It's about he/she knows what he/she can do for others.

Judy2004
Member
Posts: 10
Joined: Tue Jul 20, 2004 2:42 pm

This is the fact that we are all basically selfish.

Postby Judy2004 » Mon Aug 09, 2004 2:32 pm

I think people are basically selfish,which should not be regarded as poor quality.If you can not meet your demand, how can you give your food or money away to the poor? Those who can help the poor out must have earned surplus,which is in excess of their basical requirement.
Due to selfishness,people have invented and created so many things that they could use them to get free from physical work,simultaneously,to achieve the end,they destroyed the nature to some extent.This identifies selfishness as a double-sword.
Certainly,when we talk of basical selfishness,it is referred as an instinct response to the outside.From it,we can learn that when we deal with other people,we should respect the individuals,we had better put ourselves in the others' position,we ought not to ask too much from others.

vivian_1987
New Member
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2004 3:50 am

Postby vivian_1987 » Fri Oct 29, 2004 11:17 am

If selfishness is defined thinking mainly about one’s own personal pleasure or profit without thinking about other people . Then i do not believe that all humans are selfish. I believe that many people are very concerned about others and love is present in this world. A minority of people may be selfish but i believe the majority of people are loving. Sometimes we may resort to thinking only about ourselves when we have been hurt and we resort to self-protection. We live in a world full of different people where cooperation is vital. Therefore, we must think about others as well as ourselves

yuniu
Member
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Nov 11, 2004 1:25 am
Location: China

Postby yuniu » Mon Nov 15, 2004 10:15 am

Taking care of ourselves should be the priority lesson to everyone. If a person has no capability to take care of himself, how can we believe he is competent to balance his own interest with others. I believe a happy man delivers happiness to the neighborhood. A sad man spread pollution to the around.

User avatar
Arale
Keeper of the Board
Keeper of the Board
Posts: 755
Joined: Mon May 31, 2004 7:05 am
Status: English Learner
Location: Vietnam

Postby Arale » Mon Nov 15, 2004 11:43 am

All people are selfish. It is true. The difference is how selfish you are. Controlling your selfisfness is also an important principle to keep you from evils of life. I don't think people could absolutely rule it out so controlling it at the lowest level is really a great success.

_Arale_

User avatar
crystalfrogw
Member
Posts: 23
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2007 1:30 pm
Location: Tianjin,China

Postby crystalfrogw » Fri Apr 13, 2007 7:32 am

we must admit human beings are selfish.....but when we realize it we sholud improve ourselves all the time.After all we are not saints........

intboy
Member
Posts: 14
Joined: Wed May 16, 2007 5:34 pm
Location: China

Postby intboy » Wed May 16, 2007 5:53 pm

Selfish is not exactly bad,as we must meet ourself needs firstly,then we can help others.

kathymimi
Member
Posts: 24
Joined: Tue Mar 21, 2006 7:18 am
Location: China

Postby kathymimi » Thu May 31, 2007 2:27 pm

well, we are selfish in nature, but it doesn't mean this selfish will hurt others. unless our selfish hurts others, we should accept this personality.

User avatar
Seafarer
Gold Member
Posts: 175
Joined: Fri Aug 04, 2006 10:40 pm
Location: where i'm happy

Postby Seafarer » Wed Jun 06, 2007 1:14 pm

I had a weird example in my mind about this selfishness issue, but had never found the oppurtunity to post it, so thanks for this topic :P
I sometimes think that what if my boyfriend dies in an earthquake or any accident.Of course this means i will lose him but the person who is going to suffer cause of it , is ME! For that reason i never want this to happen.I guess this is a good example of my selfishness :roll:

User avatar
Bambang
Rough Diamond Member
Posts: 1928
Joined: Sun May 13, 2007 3:26 am
Location: Jakarta Indonesia

Postby Bambang » Wed Jul 04, 2007 9:18 am

First of all, I would like to say that we are basically selfish. That’s true. But it's still in a comma not a period. Besides selfish creatures, we are also unselfish creatures. We are also helpful. We are the best creation that God has ever made. We are balanced creatures, full of positive and negative sides. That makes us better than other creatures in this universe.

God created angels with full of kindness and devil with full of badness. My point is as balanced creatures, we should be smart in managing ourselves. All we have to do is to minimize the negative natures and optimize or maximize the positive natures. So let's minimize our selfishness.

vivian_1987 wrote:If selfishness is defined thinking mainly about one’s own personal pleasure or profit without thinking about other people. Then I do not believe that all humans are selfish. I believe that many people are very concerned about others and love is present in this world. A minority of people may be selfish but I believe the majority of people are loving. Sometimes we may resort to thinking only about ourselves when we have been hurt and we resort to self-protection. We live in a world full of different people where cooperation is vital. Therefore, we must think about others as well as ourselves


I hope and believe that you are one of those who can be categorized as a smart person at maximizing the positive natures. I really appreciate you point of view my friend.

judy2004 wrote: …If you can not meet your demand, how can you give your food or money away to the poor? Those who can help the poor out must have earned surplus…


My friend, you don’t need to be rich to be able to give something to the poor. There are many many examples in this world when poor people can give something to the poorer ones. Giving something to someone is not about the wealth. It’s about heart and willingness. Sorry my friend, I didn’t mean to judge that you don’t have heart to do good deeds. I really hope that you are not in that category. Once again, please accept my apology if I am wrong.

Finally, my point is selfishness can be minimized if we have willingness to do that.

nightwish
Silver Member
Posts: 62
Joined: Sat Jul 07, 2007 11:00 am
Location: Venus

Postby nightwish » Sat Jul 07, 2007 11:24 am

Ok. I'll start from me, as I see myself I'm not a selfish person, but sometimes the human instinct plays a good part in our life and ecpecially when it's for our interests.
I'm not the best in this world, and I never prefered myself as the good person and the best one, I help all the people who need a help, I give the people who I really love more than I can give.

so all i wanna say that, it all depends on us to be selfish or not :!:

User avatar
Bambang
Rough Diamond Member
Posts: 1928
Joined: Sun May 13, 2007 3:26 am
Location: Jakarta Indonesia

Postby Bambang » Sat Jul 07, 2007 4:10 pm

nightwish wrote:...so all i wanna say that, it all depends on us to be selfish or not :!:


Then choose not to be selfish my dear friend.
I hope and believe you will, won't you?


Return to “Talking Point Discussion”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests