Travel Anecdotes

hereiam · Post by **hereiam** » Fri Apr 14, 2006 8:26 am

don't worry- be happy Unknownsu:)
hereiam
PS. imagine that in chapter 22 of "Pride and Prejudice" Mr Collins proposed to Charlotte Lucas 3 days after proposing to Elisabeth Bennet. I feel I am disgusted!:( Men have always been pigs and it will never change, won't it?:( Luckily, Elisabeth has never loved Mr. Collins - but taking into account he was a clergyman - what low ambitions he had, indeed!:(
6 months after - I can understand somehow -but 3 days?!?
Poor Elisabeth - Charlotte has always been her best friend (apart from her older sister Jane).
I can imagine these all shrubbery-gossips in vicinity.
Well... it isn't too much bout travelling but - truly speaking - why not? Longbourn...Netherfield...very interesting travelling:)

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sun Apr 16, 2006 10:26 pm

Ah, yes, I understand now. It's like the time I had an itch that wouldn't go away. I got so fed up that I named it Frank, the 7-year itch. I know, it doesn't have much to do with traveling. Wait, it does. Frank traveled with me.

hereiam · Post by **hereiam** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 5:15 pm

Wouldn't you like to have a journey to such a lovely place?
http://www.britishtours.com/prideandpre ... PgoduipjCg

Personally, I would prefer such a tour than...defecating old women;) You?:)

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Mon Apr 17, 2006 11:18 pm

hereiam wrote:Wouldn't you like to have a journey to such a lovely place?
http://www.britishtours.com/prideandpre ... PgoduipjCg

Personally, I would prefer such a tour than...defecating old women;) You?:)

Does the tour include meeting Keira Knightley? If yes, I will definitely take it!

A tour like that would be magical. The pictured castle looks stunning but I'd rather choose a defecating woman over that because Europe, for the time being, is not my cup of tea.

hereiam · Post by **hereiam** » Tue Apr 18, 2006 5:07 am

Wow Unknownsu - as I can see you have a good taste, that's great:)
but look at the pictures I have collected using the Web - she, unfortunately, seems to have her Mr. Darcy and maybe he doesn't look too...British but remembering Alan Broody (who I think he is) surely more than 10 thousand pounds of income a year...;)
http://readingprideandprejudice.blogspot.com/
nice travelling though:)
hereiam:)

essie · Post by **essie** » Fri Jun 02, 2006 6:24 pm

Why has everyone stopped posting here??? Boo to everyone.. Boo to me

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Fri Jun 02, 2006 6:39 pm

Maybe it's because you don't write here anymore? Boo to you and Jimmy. You two guys were supposed to keep this thread alive.

Elba · Post by **Elba** » Fri Jun 02, 2006 8:17 pm

Essie,

youre writtings are a very delicious dish to read, since you don´t post I don´t want to visit the topic.
But if you are here again then I quit the diet and begin to taste your next literary creation.

essie · Post by **essie** » Fri Jun 02, 2006 8:40 pm

I always love to cook! I'll always have more stories.. Just takes time and a little bit ambition :P more coming... But exactly when, I don't know.

essie · Post by **essie** » Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:50 am

I've put out my comedic experiences, but would you guys like to read some of the more serious and/or sad stories?

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sun Jun 04, 2006 6:31 pm

Are there ones I've never heard?

essie · Post by **essie** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 8:27 pm

Well yes and no.. You've heard many of my stories, but there have been moments that I didn't tell you about. Whether it be thoughts I had, things that happened back home or incidents. Not because I didn't want you to know, but because it didn't come to me.

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Mon Jun 05, 2006 10:20 pm

I know what you mean. Today turned out to be a pretty good day. We got confirmation on buying the house in Evergreen and the Pilot Guides website accepted my story and posted it on the site. This is a pretty good accomplishment, no? Maybe you should send in one of your stories.

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 4:25 am

That's awesome, Jimmy. I told you that you were a great writer, didn't I?
Give me the link to the site. I want to see how the posted your story. I'm so excited. By the way, are you going to get paid?

essie · Post by **essie** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 8:30 am

WOW! Now me love you longer time Mr. famous writer man!

Congrats Jim..

Here's the link> http://www.pilotguides.com/community/tr ... _and_i.php

I want to submit a story now!!! IT'S MY TURN DAMN IT!!! The truth is, they won't accept my stories.. Too gory? Regardless, I'm going to send one in.. Which one do you guys think I should submit?

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 2:54 pm

Hello:) you are so accomplished in this plot but you have to admit that one of best travel anecdotes where told by ... pigs travelling in the space. It was in the series - "pigs in space". it was really funny.

# Pigs In Space – parody of science fiction shows like Star Trek, but also old '30s sci-fi serials. The spacecraft is called USS Swinetrek and the title voice-over is a parody of main Star Trek competitor Lost in Space. It featured Captain Link Hogthrob, Miss Piggy as first mate, and Dr. Julius Strangepork (the name a takeoff on "Dr. Strangelove"). Usually, the sketches would involve the long-suffering Piggy putting up with the wacko Strangepork and the braindead Link treating her as an inferior because she was a woman.

Congratulations of your achievements dear disscutants.
Stay tuned-in:)

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Tue Jun 06, 2006 11:33 pm

essie wrote:WOW! Now me love you longer time Mr. famous writer man!

Congrats Jim..

Here's the link> http://www.pilotguides.com/community/tr ... _and_i.php

I want to submit a story now!!! IT'S MY TURN DAMN IT!!! The truth is, they won't accept my stories.. Too gory? Regardless, I'm going to send one in.. Which one do you guys think I should submit?

Yes, I am famous now so I can no longer entertain you guys here because...well....I'm too famous. 8)

I think your teacher story would do good. As would your defecating woman story. The teacher story would need editing though.

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 4:38 pm

specially English teachers - boys you BOTH seem to be obssessed.
really:(.
I am not the youngest but I have NEVER EVER heard anyone like you had presented in this plot who would teach English in any university!!!
Never. And I don't believe this story can be true though I have few reasons to like teachers too.

Different thing is - for English language readers your stories are really great. I like them as deals language-side.
Though if I can be sincere I prefer reading texts from vocabvitamins.com (the linkI was sent one blessed day some time ago).
They are true poetry comparing to your defecations + illiterate and stuttering Hanoi teachers.

Here we go::)

"Signs of brown bears appeared regularly: piles of scat full of berry seeds; tufts of fur stuck in bark; and long, raking claw marks on a downed hemlock. I crossed a muskeg bog, stepping in the holes left by bear paws coming down in exactly the same place, year after year. A full-grown brown bear can weigh more than half a ton. My boots fit into their pie-tin-size prints with room to spare.

The bear trail led us into a grove where some of the trees stood as tall as 20-story buildings. The biggest ones would have been imposing when Christopher Columbus first laid eyes on the New World. The trees stood like columns in a grand cathedral, holding up the sky itself. The area under their canopy was open and airy, carpeted by ferns, moss and the four-petaled, white blooms of bunchberry dogwood."

Chris Welsch. "Tongass forest: One of nation's last great stands," Minneapolis Star-tribune (May 28, 2006).

I hope you enjoyed the text.
LM.

essie · Post by **essie** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 4:58 pm

Ladym.. err pinkfloyd err.... ? You are always way off topic and you always want to introduce something that you think is better. At first I thought you didn't understand English, but I know now that certainly isn't the case. I'm not going to try to figure you out anymore... You're just the most confusing person I've ever encountered. < And that includes the English teacher in Haiphong.

essie · Post by **essie** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 5:01 pm

Of course you have something to say about this, but I'd expect that from anyone. Though, what I'd also expect from anyone is that they'd make sense and stay on topic.. Lets see if you can do the same.

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 8:36 pm

Essie - whoever you are - I hope that during writing these messages above you have already found a publisher of your sketch about the half-mad ESL teacher (not a single word about money still).
But have you found it here? On Englishclub? Interesting. That's all from the most confusing person in Haiphong - like you have written above. Haiphong - I like it. Really.
Nice day though,
LM
:D

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 8:51 pm

I'm sorry but exactly what are you saying here? :? :? :?

essie · Post by **essie** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 8:52 pm

LadyMacbeth wrote:Essie - whoever you are - I hope that during writing these messages above you have already found a publisher of your sketch about the half-mad ESL teacher (not a single word about money still).
But have you found it here? On Englishclub? Interesting. That's all from the most confusing person in Haiphong - like you have written above. Haiphong - I like it. Really.
Nice day though,
LM
:D

What?

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Wed Jun 07, 2006 8:53 pm

I think LM is saying you have bedbugs that got too comfortable on your bed and no longer wants to leave. Bedbugs - I like them. Really. :D

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Thu Jun 08, 2006 2:42 pm

it isn't anything easy to be a teacher. What can you know about it? Cockroaches? Fine story - really. But who (serious) would publish a story about English language-ignorant teacher language... professor?
Lets say one day I am an editor of a small local newspaper in MY country. Then I CAN create a column "Let's learn English" or rather "Lets use English" and I can put there everything I want (if I am alllowed of course).
So lets say I like essie's story about a professor of English language from Haiphong and I CAN put it into English language column in a local newspaper for which I am responsible.
Some people can feel still offended by this deed of mine (after reading the stuff) but in fact noone could do anything bad to me because I put such a thing in a little local newspaper.
That's what I know about REAL life.
Another thing about little local newspapers is that a main editor of one of them has just been fired after a total row (started during last Christams time) when she (a woman was in charge of it) put Christmas wishes from a local mayor in black and white print on page number 3 of this newspaper (that is dependent on this mayor of course) and Christmas wishes from editors were colourful and nice but again put badly cause on the...last page of this newspaper.
I am all in laugh knowing that another mayor in another little town publishes his little newspaper on HIS OWN and put HIS Christams wishes on FIRST page of HIS little newspaper.
How do you like my local journeys?
LM
PS1 Which mayor is the best in your opinion? The last one is in MINE little town.
PS2. Now you can understnd what is a good PROPAGANDA and what for local newspapers in some countries exist!
hahaha:)

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Thu Jun 08, 2006 2:44 pm

English language ignorant professor of English language - I wanted to write above.

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Thu Jun 08, 2006 2:49 pm

I would put the story about a badly trained English language professor with a comment that in some countries professors must be really uneducated and we should feel obliged to be much, much better.
LM:)

essie · Post by **essie** » Thu Jun 08, 2006 6:15 pm

What?

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Thu Jun 08, 2006 6:56 pm

?!?
Now I don't know what do you mean by your *what*exclamation:((( Isn't it your story - the one cited beneath by me?!?

It’s on a very quiet street and I would take advantage of this by sitting, sipping on sugar cane juice and simply watching everything. One day, during my daily “sit sip watch” session, I noticed a very short, dark man wearing a bright pink dress shirt. He waved in my direction, grinning ear to ear, he approached me and sat at my table. “hello mynayduc!”, the man said. I thought for a minute and realized he was trying to speak English. “pardon me?”, I replied. He spoke in a much more excited, but slower tone this time, “HELLO! My.. Naaay Duc!!”. “Oh, very nice to meet you Duc!”. We both smiled and I ordered him a beer. “thankyoushoma Very Happy” … “You’re very welcome Duc!” .. So we somehow managed to communicate for about 10 minutes, mind you it was extremely difficult on my end. His English was very broken and he would say “yes okay” in response to many questions… Questions, which I knew he didn’t understand. I finally asked him what his job was and he didn’t understand me. So I looked in my pocket dictionary and pointed out the word “job”. With a big grin on his face “oohhh!! Work me huh?” … “Yes, yes.. Work you! What is your work, job” . Duc thought for a minute, as if he was trying to translate a response “teesa! Teesa!!!” . “You make T-shirts?”, I responded while holding out my t-shirt. “Khong! (“no” in Vietnamese) .. uh No!! Teesa, student”. .. “Oh really? What do you teach?” . “I teesa tieng anh”. I thought for a second and realized that “tieng anh” means “English”. Very confused, I asked “you teach English?”. “yeh univesty! I teesa Englees Haiphong Univesty”. … Again, “you’re an English professor at Haiphong University?”. “ I work Englees teesa Haiphong Univesty”. I broke down and couldn’t contain my laughter. He looked shocked and I felt horrible about it. I bought him another beer and thought to myself “man I hope he’s joking”.
Hypothetically the story above can be a negative example of
1. how badly educated are some English language teachers from Haiphong Univeristy
2. how stupid jokes about some great professors make some students who had been kicked out by them bit earlier.

LM

essie · Post by **essie** » Thu Jun 08, 2006 8:22 pm

I said "what?" because your never ending ramblings constantly jump from one topic to another... You never come close to responding to other posts. While the posters are conversing about one topic, or topics that relate, you bring in subjects like "pigs in space" and why you feel that vocabvitamins.com is better than our stories. Your never ending reminders of why you think everything you know of is better than what we have... You mentioned that there's no way to make money from our stories.. You've gone on to calling me stupid, but then you also mentioned that it's my duty to teach you English. You constantly remind us that you're a teacher... Then there are some things I just can't mention here because I just can't make sense of. Have you wondered why we don't respond to half the stuff you post? ...

Read the following thread.. If you don't understand my point after reading this, then I'm going to give up on you.> http://www.englishclub.com/esl-forums/v ... hp?t=36664

---

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Thu Jun 08, 2006 11:11 pm

essie wrote:I said "what?" because your never ending ramblings constantly jump from one topic to another... You never come close to responding to other posts. While the posters are conversing about one topic, or topics that relate, you bring in subjects like "pigs in space" and why you feel that vocabvitamins.com is better than our stories. Your never ending reminders of why you think everything you know of is better than what we have... You mentioned that there's no way to make money from our stories.. You've gone on to calling me stupid, but then you also mentioned that it's my duty to teach you English. You constantly remind us that you're a teacher... Then there are some things I just can't mention here because I just can't make sense of. Have you wondered why we don't respond to half the stuff you post? ...

Read the following thread.. If you don't understand my point after reading this, then I'm going to give up on you.> http://www.englishclub.com/esl-forums/v ... hp?t=36664

---

That pretty much sums it up.

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 2:31 pm

Well I don't think I have been talking time and again that I am a teacher. If you think I do - maybe you simply don't like teachers too much and you have allergical reaction to ANY mentioning by anyone he/she is a teacher. Once again - I really don't think I exaggerate here with underlining it (do I really?)
Another thing is that the older I am the worst I am. Fact:(
I know it but this is quite different kettle of fish - I presume.
I mean - people want to punish me for my bit(?) devilish way of being but in fact they put long-distant hard times on themselves not on me. Why? Cause I AM DAMN RIGHT!:( And it is enough reason:(.

Now - what else don't you understand Essie? My story about African continent hitting Europe several time isn't the best as deals language side but I hope it is easy to get that some million years ago the two continents were placed in different areas than they are today. So African continent was much further from European and hit it several times forming both all European mountain ranges and Mediterrainen Sea that was once empty and once full of water that had been poured from Atlantic Ocean into it in several series - each lasting about 100 years.
On that spot (the border between Atalntic Ocean and Mediterainen Sea) great waterfalls arose - each much bigger than Niagara today. At last Mediterainen Sea has become full of water and no waterfalls there today.
Isn't it simple? I hope it is.
Nice day.

Why?

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 2:41 pm

Yesterday I put your story about Haiphong teacher on one of Polish educational forums and today it isn't that any longer.
Really. I wonder why.... maybe someone could read much better that speak? So pity it will be a puzzle for ever - as I think today.
:)

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 2:43 pm

it isn't THERE of course.
LM

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 5:35 pm

I still make too many errors - of course (...)read THAN speak not THAT speak - in the post above.
THAT's all:)
LM

vince90 · Post by **vince90** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 6:23 pm

Ops! Run.....let get the hell out of here fast..…

essie · Post by **essie** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 7:15 pm

The story about the English teacher... I agree it needs touching up. I spent very little time on it and I wrote it quickly from memory. If that's what's bothering you, I will edit it to mate it more readable, but if not, why do you keep bringing it up? You don't believe it.. You've old us time and time again. okay! Now would you like a prize? Here it is> I'm going to give you a chance to better understand things.. One more chance.. I haven't given up on you yet!

The following thread... It is more about us imitating you.. If you scroll down and read the responses and still don't understand then I must begin to ignore you hence forth...

http://www.englishclub.com/esl-forums/v ... hp?t=36664

------

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 7:40 pm

you can ignore me - in fact I don't care about it so nothing big.
I have been writing here to discuss some things but I DID noticed some good time ago that people on THIS forum prefer rather wishing other mental hospital than discussing anything at all:(
So as a catholic instead of mental hospital I can wish everyone who persecutes me a hell in future and you have to admit to me that I am still more long-distanced in my POSITIVE thinking whatever you mean. hahaha:)

You know - I have never had any need to wish anyone mental hospital and writing here for a longer time - who can know what you are wishing to me at this moment!
Another mental hospital? Till the time of this writing of mine it isn't me who visited it. another hahaha. I have to be really from hell:(
Nothing strange cause all in all I am Lady Macbeth and everyone knows who was she!

essie · Post by **essie** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 8:09 pm

So you think that you're the actual Lady Macbeth ... Why would I wish to a mental hospital?

I abhore thee. I shall beteem my bastard and ignore thee!

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 8:55 pm

you are probably from the species of males who like to have the last word everytime and everywhere. I understand you.
But I am from the same species of women and you know - two people cannot have the last word at the same time.
So because I am much wiser than you I am leaving you LAST word NOW but I am sure a time for MY last word will come one day. Maybe even sooner than you can expect.
We two are too different to talk about anything at all. I don't care about your family problems and I don't need you to talk to you about my family. That's clear for me. Travels are great when you have eaither money to travel or good friends to chat with during it.
You and your friend here probably have too high opinion of themselves to leave people in peace and want always prove you are right. I don't need it thus I promise never bother anyone of you on-line. Write in peace your mocking stories from Gods perspectives and enjoy your time here dear ...English helpers.
My road - thanks God - is different.
LadyMacbeth

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Fri Jun 09, 2006 8:58 pm

too high opinion of yourselves - of course.

essie · Post by **essie** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 5:43 am

frengo wrote:I have found both your stories very interesting, could listen for this kind of tales for hours... As long as youll'be writing here, you will have a reader!

Where have you gone Frengo?

What about your promise?

MissLT · Post by **MissLT** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 9:32 am

LadyMacbeth wrote:Yesterday I put your story about Haiphong teacher on one of Polish educational forums and today it isn't that any longer.
Really. I wonder why.... maybe someone could read much better that speak? So pity it will be a puzzle for ever - as I think today.
:)

You took his story without his permission?

Did you even quote the freaking link where you got it from? And give us the link. I, personally, would like to see how you quoted it.

MissLT · Post by **MissLT** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 9:34 am

LadyMacbeth wrote:you can ignore me - in fact I don't care about it so nothing big.
I have been writing here to discuss some things but I DID noticed some good time ago that people on THIS forum prefer rather wishing other mental hospital than discussing anything at all:(

Oh so now it's our fault you're a... whatever you are....???

MissLT · Post by **MissLT** » Sat Jun 10, 2006 9:36 am

LadyMacbeth wrote: But I am from the same species of women and you know - two people cannot have the last word at the same time.

There's no way I'm swinging on the same tree with ya.

LadyMacbeth · Post by **LadyMacbeth** » Sun Jun 11, 2006 10:23 am

Don't THREATEN me, PLEASE that I am such a pitiful person to put things written by others as mine own!!! :(((
I would prefer to die than experience such a pitiful time of mine:(((
Travel in peace.
LM

MissLT · Post by **MissLT** » Sun Jun 11, 2006 4:19 pm

Did I sound really aggressive towards you? Hmmmmm... :? Let me paraphrase myself then.

You took his story without his permission? Did you give out the link to this place, where you got it from? And please, give us the link to your site. I'd like to read it in Polish.

How about it now? Better?

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Mon Jun 12, 2006 4:38 am

essie wrote:
frengo wrote:I have found both your stories very interesting, could listen for this kind of tales for hours... As long as youll'be writing here, you will have a reader!
Where have you gone Frengo? What about your promise?

Sigh...why can't some people keep their word, eh?

EnglishClub ESL Forums

Travel Anecdotes

it is very simple

Oh Unknownsu - look at this link!

Re: Oh Unknownsu - look at this link!

travelling with last Elisabeth Bennet:)

hello in this plot:)

teachers, teachers, teachers....

ps.

Re: ps.

to SOME EC writers,

ps.

ps2.

pardon,

Ups ups ups...

ps.

ps.

last ps.

dear essie,

I undestand you essie,

ps.

Re: ps.

Re: dear essie,

Re: I undestand you essie,

Dear Lennye:)