Travel Anecdotes

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Mon Mar 14, 2005 9:42 pm

Essie and I have a fond, fond interest in Vietnam and both of us have been there on two occasions.

Can online friends really be friends?

I met essie online when I accidentally ran into his online journal after I came back from my second trip to Vietnam. I wrote him upon finishing his journal and complimented him on a job well done. It was my first time writing to a stranger. I received a reply from him two days later. He told me I was the first person to reply to him. That was how our friendship started - two years ago.

We have numerous stories in relation to this wonderful and exciting country and we would like to share our experiences with some of you who are interested.

Please feel free to comment on the anecdotes in this thread.

essie · Post by **essie** » Tue Mar 15, 2005 6:00 am

Thanks for getting it started Jim!

My girlfriend is Vietnamese, so during my first visit to Vietnam, my first destination was Haiphong (her birth city). It was a very new experience and most of it was truly humorous. I guess it would be best to start with a short story that somewhat relates to this forum.

- at the cafe in Haiphong

"I teesa eenglees"

My girlfriends Aunt owns a small roadside Café. It’s on a very quiet street and I would take advantage of this by sitting, sipping on sugar cane juice and simply watching everything. One day, during my daily “sit sip watch” session, I noticed a very short, dark man wearing a bright pink dress shirt. He waved in my direction, grinning ear to ear, he approached me and sat at my table. “hello mynayduc!”, the man said. I thought for a minute and realized he was trying to speak English. “pardon me?”, I replied. He spoke in a much more excited, but slower tone this time, “HELLO! My.. Naaay Duc!!”. “Oh, very nice to meet you Duc!”. We both smiled and I ordered him a beer. “thankyoushoma :D” … “You’re very welcome Duc!” .. So we somehow managed to communicate for about 10 minutes, mind you it was extremely difficult on my end. His English was very broken and he would say “yes okay” in response to many questions… Questions, which I knew he didn’t understand. I finally asked him what his job was and he didn’t understand me. So I looked in my pocket dictionary and pointed out the word “job”. With a big grin on his face “oohhh!! Work me huh?” … “Yes, yes.. Work you! What is your work, job” . Duc thought for a minute, as if he was trying to translate a response “teesa! Teesa!!!” . “You make T-shirts?”, I responded while holding out my t-shirt. “Khong! (“no” in Vietnamese) .. uh No!! Teesa, student”. .. “Oh really? What do you teach?” . “I teesa tieng anh”. I thought for a second and realized that “tieng anh” means “English”. Very confused, I asked “you teach English?”. “yeh univesty! I teesa Englees Haiphong Univesty”. … Again, “you’re an English professor at Haiphong University?”. “ I work Englees teesa Haiphong Univesty”. I broke down and couldn’t contain my laughter. He looked shocked and I felt horrible about it. I bought him another beer and thought to myself “man I hope he’s joking”.

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Tue Mar 15, 2005 4:28 pm

I love that story!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Tue Mar 15, 2005 8:19 pm

Why Vietnam?

Everyone has their own reason to visit another country. My reason for loving Vietnam is partially because I was born there. I took my first trip there during the cold winter of 2002. This was my first trip outside Canada. I must admit, I did not do much research on Vietnam before I jumped on the plane and traveled halfway around the world. I can still vividly remember stepping out of the airport that day.

As I entered Tan Son Nhat airport from the plane, I couldn’t help but notice its emptiness, an almost ghost-like presence around other than the flock of passengers from my flight. Vietnamese customs officers are some of the meanest out there. They scrutinize you as if you were wanted for murder. Bribes are the norm amongst Asians but I felt this was against my principles. Although it took me a bit longer to get past customs, I felt I did not betray myself.

My parents arrived a day prior to me so they promised they would greet me at the airport. I braced myself to step foot on the country I was born and headed for the main exit with my trusty declaration paper in hand. Since it was winter in Canada, I had a thick sweater on with a moderately thick windbreaker on top. The main entrance doors swung open and as I stepped out of Tan Son Nhat, I felt myself getting hit by a wall of humidity. The air was so thick and humid it almost pushed me back.

I quickly tossed the pain aside as I stared at literally hundreds of Vietnamese locals staring right back at me behind a waist-high steel fence. I froze. I didn’t know what to make of it. Why were they there? Are they here to arrest me? Are they here to rob me? I have never witnessed such chaos and confusion before. I didn’t know what to do.

A man in dress shirt and tie approached me. “Sir, let me helping you! You come alone?”

“No, I’m waiting for my parents.” I politely replied as I still eyed what seemed like a mass uprising.

“This way, sir.” He grabbed the declaration card from my hand and automatically I knew something was wrong.

“Give that back to me,” I said, trying not to be impolite. As I wrestled with him, I heard my name being called.

“Hoa!!!!!!!!” I looked over my shoulder and noticed my uncle calling out from the crowd. He had to jump in order for me to see him. I told the gentleman that I had a ride and to give me back my card. He reluctantly did so. He was a taxi driver, a very persistent taxi driver. I met up with my uncle and he shielded me within his arms. We met with my parents and headed into Saigon.

I started having regrets of going to Vietnam right after that incident for I have never been so uncertain in my life. It appears that the locals standing outside the airport were all waiting for passengers or loved ones. I later found out that only travelers were allowed inside Tan Son Nhat.

frengo · Post by **frengo** » Tue Mar 15, 2005 9:03 pm

I have found both your stories very interesting, could listen for this kind of tales for hours... As long as youll'be writing here, you will have a reader!

essie · Post by **essie** » Tue Mar 15, 2005 10:36 pm

Unknownsu wrote: Vietnamese customs officers are some of the meanest out there. They scrutinize you as if you were wanted for murder.

Really!? Hmmm... They're always so nice to me. One of the guys even said "Em dep lam" = You're very handsome.. ;):P

Unknownsu wrote: Since it was winter in Canada, I had a thick sweater on with a moderately thick windbreaker on top. The main entrance doors swung open and as I stepped out of Tan Son Nhat, I felt myself getting hit by a wall of humidity. The air was so thick and humid it almost pushed me back.

It was the same for me, but I was smart enough to wear a t-shirt. I changed at the Hong Kong airport. ;)

__
Aside from the mean customs officers, my experience was very similar. My girlfriend’s uncle (in his police chief uniform) managed to walk in and help with my luggage. Up to this point I was very afraid of him as I had only seen very mean looking pictures of him. Though all that fear left me the instant he smacked my bum :P . Then the humidity! lol...

I'm trying to think of another good story to share..

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Tue Mar 15, 2005 11:42 pm

frengo wrote:I have found both your stories very interesting, could listen for this kind of tales for hours... As long as youll'be writing here, you will have a reader!

By all means, Frengo, join in and tell us some of your experiences. They don't necessarily have to have anything related to Vietnam. Some interesting stories are just as welcomed.

essie wrote:It was the same for me, but I was smart enough to wear a t-shirt. I changed at the Hong Kong airport. ;)

Are you saying I wasn't smart enough?? You.....Yeah, you're right. You have to understand that I didn't get much sleep the night before, couldn't sleep on the flight over the Pacific, and was filled with excitement. You have to admit, the airport personnels totally abuse the priviledge of their command over the air conditioning though. I think they feel the colder it is, the better. That is why I didn't think about it at the time because I felt comfortable with all my clothing. Or maybe I am stupid because I did the same thing in Bangkok too.

But that's another story - It was 2 in the morning!!!

essie wrote:Though all that fear left me the instant he smacked my bum :P .

Forgive me but when I read this, I couldn't help but picture a pimp slapping his bitch. Oh, the poor rusty feelings that are going through my head are not good!

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Wed Mar 16, 2005 5:50 pm

Thanks Essie and Jimmy for sharing those great stories with us. I hope you keep posting more. I find them very interesting and funny to read. Good job!

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Fri Mar 18, 2005 7:46 am

Ummm....Wasn't someone supposed to write something?

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Fri Mar 18, 2005 6:13 pm

violet wrote:I am the third reader here. You have done a great job, Unknownsu and Essie! They are very interesting stories, I'm very fond of them. By the way, were they your real experiences?

Although these stories are nothing extravagant, they are real experiences for essie and I. Thank you, Violet.

I will be adding another tonight since essie is such a lazy.....

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 3:53 am

The Disappearing Act

A friend of mine owns a shop on Dong Khoi Street in the centre of downtown Saigon aka Ho Chi Minh City. Because it is a shopping haven for tourists, I usually enjoyed sitting in front of his shop to watch the people and world pass me by.

One day, I was walking down Dong Khoi and a girl sporting a common conical hat in a black traditional ao dai approached me in the blazing sun. “Haiku sa mana o dojo,” she routinely said.

“I’m not Japanese,” I replied with a smile, content with being on my way.

She smiled back at me, not knowing what to do next. She was a welcome hostess, trying to lure tourists into a Thai traditional massage parlour owned by a Japanese entrepreneur. She did not speak a word of English but at the time, I had a decent understanding of the Vietnamese language.

She then grabbed my arm and dragged me out of the burning sun. “Anh la nguoi gi?” (What is your nationality?)

“Anh la nguoi Hoa,” (I am Chinese) I replied.

I enjoyed conversing in Vietnamese because I was learning the language at the time. Much like all other languages, the Vietnamese language has different variations of words. There could be 2, 3, or 4 ways to express the same thought. For some odd reason, this girl seemed to have read my mind because everything she said, I understood. I don’t know why, but she sat me down on a moped next to a podium she used for God knows what reason as she continued to attract tourists.

In a way, I was grateful she pulled me out of the sun. The pollution and heat in the city can really take its toll on aimless wanderers like me.

I was beginning to enjoy my afternoon break on someone’s moped when a boy with a wooden box in hand suddenly came up to me. He was a shoeshine boy, less than 12 years of age. They roam heavily touristy streets with hopes of earning a good buck or two shining shoes.

Knowing Vietnam means knowing the prices and the system. A shoeshine would cost an ignorant foreigner 20,000d or $1.5usd roughly. A fairly priced shoeshine for a tourist would be 5,000d while a Vietnamese local would pay no more than 3,000d.

The boy lifted his box - a sign of asking if I needed my shoes to be shined. I shook my head and looked away. These kids can be persistent and ignoring them is the best solution. If you show a hint of smile or voice a simple “no”, they will practically follow you to the end of the world.

Defeated, I offered, “Hai ngan?” (2,000)

The boy then started blurting out words at the speed of light. I just stared at him and smiled because I knew he would not accept my ridiculous proposition.

He gave his best offer, “Ba ngan.” (3,000)

I declined.

Hoa, the girl that dragged me out of the sun eyed the both of us with rapt attention. She then said something to the boy which I interpreted as “get lost, he doesn’t want his shoe shined”. The boy, after waving off her threat, diverted his attention back to me and held his offer at 3,000 dong. For 15 minutes, he stayed at my side while asking and begging me to help him out. Finally, he gave in. He nodded and agreed to the price of 2,000d. I was dumbfounded. So I thought to myself, what the heck, it’s only 2,000d.

He removed my shoes and went off about 3 meters and plumped his scrawny ass on the hot, concrete street. Hoa then approached and pretty much lectured me on how to ignore street sellers. I only half-listened as I contemplated on what I should do for the remainder of the day.

After a minute of deep thinking, I glanced up at a smiling Hoa. Realizing something was wrong, I frantically searched the busy street of Dong Khoi and asked, “Shoeshine o dau?” (Where’s the shoeshine boy?)

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 6:23 pm

Anh la nguoi Hoa.....(Hoa in this sentence is same as Hua, I think. It means Chinese)

Hoa, the girl that....(Hoa in this sentence means flower and it is the girl's name)

The boy ran off with my shoes. I was so shocked and Hoa felt horrible. Anyhow, Hoa asked a taxi driver nearby if he could lend me his shoes. :( A friend of mine lives only a minute away from where the incident occured so I had to walk in the driver's tiny shoes.

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 6:58 pm

Unknownsu wrote: :( A friend of mine lives only a minute away from where the incident occured so I had to walk in the driver's tiny shoes.

OH, MY POOR THING!

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 9:33 pm

Lalee wrote:OH, MY POOR THING!

Are you being sarcastic? I felt like a reject, you know.....Oh, how sad....

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 10:38 pm

Motor City Mania

Saigon has an estimated 2 million motorbikes, though I personally feel this number should be a lot higher. The bikes range from 50 to 200cc. I drove a 1500cc motorcycle once and fell in love with it so when I was in Vietnam, I jumped on the opportunity to ride free again! My friend’s brother taught me late at night once on his 50cc because he was afraid I was going to destroy public and private property.

Let me tell you something about the rules of driving in Vietnam. There are none. Green light means go. Yellow light means speed up and go. Red light means slow down a bit and go. Do not look when you turn, just turn. One ways are optional. Two way traffic is a suggestion. Pedestrians are moving pylons so try to avoid them by driving as close as you can.

My friend, who owns the shop on Dong Khoi, wanted to drive me back to the place I was staying and so I asked him if I could take the wheel, or the handle, to be more precise. He owns a Honda Dream. I’m not too sure of its motor class but I think it’s somewhere between 110-130cc.

As I was driving back to my house, with my friend at my back, I noticed a girl in an ao dai riding a bicycle in front of me. I was already having a hard time controlling the scooter for fear that a sudden move would ensure a rough meeting for the both of us with the pavement.

Finally, I lost it. My friend started yelling out to me that I was getting too close to the girl’s rear wheel. My concentration was on the task at hand and I was oblivious to his dying words in the wind when suddenly, I nicked the girl’s rear wheel, almost throwing her off her bike. She swerved a bit but finally gained her balance and composure. I was so embarrassed I was sure I felt my friend ridiculing me in his mind.

I slowed down a bit and skillfully maneuvered the bike directly behind her; away from her field of vision. She glanced over her shoulder to the left. I moved slightly to the right. And as she repeated over her right shoulder, I quickly drove out to the left and twisted the accelerator to pass by her, without looking back.

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 11:11 pm

"yawn" That story was pretty dull. As if we didn't know you suck in everything you do. Yeah, you almost killed a person, who cares!
I'll give you another chance and make sure you do it better this time.

And yes, I was being sarcastic. Any problem with that? You were the one who taught me that, remember?

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sat Mar 19, 2005 11:16 pm

You moron!!!!! Because of you, I will no longer write in this topic!!!!!!!! Why write when it just bores the reader, right? Urgh, sarcastic or not, I hate you.....

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 5:18 am

Unknownsu wrote:You moron!!!!! Because of you, I will no longer write in this topic!!!!!!!! Why write when it just bores the reader, right? Urgh, sarcastic or not, I hate you.....

At least I read it, right? You should thank me for that!
Now, whether you keep posting or not, that’s up to you. Should I care about it?
Don’t think only in me, Jimmy. It’s not such a good idea to deprive others like that. Other members here MIGHT appeal to your writing. So forget about me.
Peace out!
;)

essie · Post by **essie** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 5:36 am

Love ya Jim! Keep the stories coming... And sorry for the late post>

Hammer time

As with my first trip to Vietnam, I spent the first two weeks of my second trip with my girlfriend’s family as well. When it was time to go to Hanoi (capital city) some of her family came along for the first day. To my dislike they had already booked a hotel for us. We decided to stay there for a couple of hours and headed out to look for better accommodations.

After 2 hours of visiting hotels we found a really nice place ‘Anh 2 Hotel’. Air-conditioned, clean, new, bath and shower and an extremely friendly English speaking staff! We managed to bargain the price of $25/night down to $14/night, so we were excited to say the least. With huge smiles on both our faces, we headed back to the original hotel to get our luggage.

As we were checking out I noticed one of the hotel staff play fighting outside. He seemed to be smiling, but then I noticed the anger in the other guys face. It then got serious, and he and the next guy starting punching... I shouted to the receptions, “Anh hoi!!” (hey brother) and then pointed out towards the fight. He ran to his coworker’s aid and managed to break up the fight. The guy left shouting and probably cursing. All seemed well and the receptionist/hero looked at us and said, “ees no problem… pees let me hepyoo”, He lifted two of my heavy suitcases and carried them out. “ees no problem” he uttered again…

While we waited outside for a taxi, the guy came back with a meat clever (hammer) in his hand. He chased the hotel staff to the back and I noticed a tussle. A very feminine hotel guest (American) ran out in tears shouting, “oh my god, oh my god, oh my god…” . As he was frolicking out, a girl was walking in. I told her that I wouldn’t go in if I was her, so we all stayed out and watched in horror (I was actually entertained). The guy who had originally ran in with a hammer started stumbling back out. I noticed his nose spewing blood and when I took a closer look. Flat!! His nose was flat like a pancake and what I had originally thought to be a spewing nose turned out to be a cracked head! Blood started squirting all over!! In fear of getting blood on my luggage, I shouted to the Taxi driver and my girlfriend “Watch the bags! Take them and throw them in [to the taxi].. QUICKLY!!!”. I didn’t want to get sick. We quickly grabbed the bags and hid them. I then noticed the receptionist and he said with a big smile on his face and blood all over his hands, “Ees no problem. Enjoy Vietnam!”. . .

We took off and just like the receptionist said, we enjoyed the remainder of our stay in Vietnam.

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 5:45 am

I don't blame you bro, I'd be entertained too. I didn't personally witness any fights in 'Nam but I love the way the Vietnamese start off something in a playful way, only to end it off in bloodshed. Good job!

Continue with the stories!!! I have a thing for receptionists, remember that! If you write the story I want, I might entertain others with bananas and embryos.

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 6:12 am

Wow Essie! The things that happen to you!

essie · Post by **essie** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 7:13 am

"terrible story"?? How so?

I think it's better described as dark yet comical.....

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sun Mar 20, 2005 4:23 pm

Thank you again Violet. I'm glad at least you find my stories amusing in some way. I will continue to write here and ignore anything Lalee says. 2 of my brothers have been to China and when I described the traffic in Vietnam, they said it reminded them of China, just like you.

As Essie said, his experience is a bit of a dark comedy. Essie had no power over how the story was going to turn out. He just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. :) We want to share our stories, good and bad.

frengo · Post by **frengo** » Mon Mar 21, 2005 7:55 pm

Go on, I keep on reading... :R:

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 2:44 am

Take That!

Because I am of Chinese descent, finding local Chinese-Vietnamese friends is as easy as stealing candy from a child. I am fluent in Cantonese and have a bit of knowledge of Mandarin. More than half of the people I know in Vietnam speak Cantonese so needless to say, that is my communication of choice.

During my first visit, I had the opportunity to meet one of my closest Vietnamese friends today. But knowing her also means knowing her entire family. She has an elder sister named Mun Yi; a sister that I cannot even begin to understand. Mun Yi once told me that when foreigners come to Vietnam, they must pick up the bill. I almost laughed at the notion. The way I see it, since the local people have the decency to spend time and show me around, it’s only right that I pay for everything. Everything is so cheap anyway. So really, I want to pay, not because I have to.

Mun Yi owns a little stall in which she sells drinks outside a mediocre movie theatre on a busy District 3 street. Her sister, my friend, left for Australia the day prior to my arrival so when I was bored, I would pay Mun Yi a visit to kill some excess time I had. We usually talked about nothing because our opinions were so divergent. She then popped a surprise question for me. (Mind you, everything spoken was held in Cantonese)

“Do you know what kind of present I can get for my friend’s birthday,” she asked.

“Guy or girl?”

“Guy.”

“No clue, guys are too difficult to shop for.”

“Give me a rough idea.”

“I don’t know, maybe you should offer yourself as a present,” I said jokingly.

She started laughing hysterically. “Great idea, but how?”

If she found what I said offensive, I would’ve stopped there but since she laughed at my suggestion, green lights started flashing in my head telling me to proceed without caution.

“It’s actually pretty simple when you think about it. Just tell him you will meet him at your house at a specific time, and when he arrives, get him by himself and....” Shhhhhrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiippppp! I imitated the ripping of a shirt with hand gestures.

“OK!!!”

At this point in time, her hand came out of nowhere and slapped me across the face. She then practically fell on the floor holding her stomach from extensive, convulsive laughter. I was utterly stunned and speechless. My ears rang from the off guard attack as I stared at her in disbelief. The world suddenly began to swarm in around me as I tried to figure out exactly what just happened. I still didn’t understand.

I was furious beyond reason and had every right to be. I looked at her (still laughing) and calmly said, “I’m leaving.” I was afraid if I stayed any longer, I would’ve lost control of my sanity and unleashed hell upon everyone on that street...

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 4:38 am

Now, that story was pretty cool. That girl was totally insane. I didn't like the "slap you acroos your face" part, though. That bitch!!
My poor baby!

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Thu Mar 24, 2005 5:10 am

Take That Part II

My last trip to Vietnam lasted just shy of three months. I arrived armed with barely knowing how to count from one to ten in Vietnamese. I started getting fed up when people around me said things like, “Vietnamese Vietnamese Vietnamese Vietnamese Jimmy Vietnamese Vietnamese, Vietnamese Vietnamese Vietnamese Jimmy.” So, a month into my trip I decided to do the inevitable; I started to learn the language.

It was very difficult at first but once you gradually get into the flow, you can enhance your vocabulary at an incredible rate. I learned anything anyone was willing to teach me. I made notes; I practiced my speech without shame; I told everyone to speak s..l..o..w..l..y but not all listened. By the end of my stay in Vietnam, I felt I had a good understanding of the language.

I had the opportunity to meet a nice 40-year old Vietnamese lady. She spoke English and French. She treated me, a “rich” foreigner, whenever she had the chance. She taught me everything there is to know about Vietnam. When I was stressing on searching for a house to stay in, she was more worried than I. All in all, she was genuine. Her name is Chi Chi.

It happened on a typical bright, sunny, and hot day in downtown Saigon. I was having one of those touch-me-and-die days. I felt lonely and depressed even though I knew I had numerous friends at my disposal.

I just arrived at Chi Chi’s souvenir shop on Dong Khoi Street. I didn’t feel like talking and was content with just sitting and sipping my ca phe sua da, or iced coffee. For some odd reason, Chi Chi was in a talkative mood. She started asking me questions in Vietnamese.

I replied, “Chi, I don’t feel like speaking Vietnamese today. I’m tired and I really don’t want to think.”

Still, she didn’t seem to understand what I wanted to say even though she has a good understanding of English. Again, she asked me something in Vietnamese.

I looked at her, mystified.

She repeated herself.

I replied, evidently annoyed, “What?”

She asked again.

“What?” I replied.

Now she was getting frustrated. She attempted one last time to try to get me to speak Vietnamese.

“Whaaat?” I routinely said.

I had a feeling something dreadful was going to happen and my speculation proved itself to be accurate. Everything seemed to happen in slow motion as I witnessed Chi Chi’s hand come up from behind her, headed straight for my face. I managed to dodge a majority of the fatal blow and even though I moved at ninja lightning speed, her hand still managed to brush my face.

I gave her a glare that, in my opinion, killed everything in a one kilometer radius. What really got me angry was that I told Chi Chi about my previous slap and she seemed very sympathetic about the whole ordeal.

I started, “Chi, I told you how I feel about people slapping me. Don’t you ever. My mom doesn’t even think about slapping me, let alone you.”

Chi Chi realized how wrong she was and started apologizing profusely. “I’m so sorry, if my son acted the way you did, I would’ve slapped him!”

“Chi, I’m not your son.” I said, no longer wanting part of the conversation.

I, then, thought to myself, “What is with women slapping me?”

To this day, Chi Chi is still a good friend of mine. I can't say the same for the original slapper though.

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Thu Mar 24, 2005 5:11 am

I strongly feel that our fan base has been diminishing, not that is was large in the first place so........

I decided to write one more story and call it quits.

essie · Post by **essie** » Thu Mar 24, 2005 5:37 am

Quit!? Why? I'm going to keep writing so.... Keep on writing Jimyboy! If you write it, they will read. My next story - Nightly Jogs through the streets of Hanoi ....

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Thu Mar 24, 2005 5:08 pm

Oh my poor Jimmy!
Now I'm angry at Vietnamese ladies. What's wrong with them? The two women who slapped you, I think there was no need to do so. Well, the first one did it as a way of madness, still...but what about the other one? She did it just because you were not in the mood? Geez.. oh Jimmy, what can I say, you are just the luckiest man when it comes to women!

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Thu Mar 24, 2005 9:09 pm

lalee wrote:Well, the first one did it as a way of madness

The first girl didn't slap me because she was mad, she slapped me because she thought it was funny.

Wrong, very wrong. :W: :W: :W:

essie wrote:Nightly Jogs through the streets of Hanoi ....

I think this story goes out to Frengo....

Dixie · Post by **Dixie** » Fri Mar 25, 2005 10:12 am

essie wrote: One day, during my daily “sit sip watch” session, I noticed a very short, dark man wearing a bright pink dress shirt. He waved in my direction, grinning ear to ear, he approached me and sat at my table. “hello mynayduc!”, the man said. I thought for a minute and realized he was trying to speak English. “pardon me?”, I replied. He spoke in a much more excited, but slower tone this time, “HELLO! My.. Naaay Duc!!”. “Oh, very nice to meet you Duc!”. We both smiled and I ordered him a beer. “thankyoushoma :D” … “You’re very welcome Duc!” .. So we somehow managed to communicate for about 10 minutes, mind you it was extremely difficult on my end. His English was very broken and he would say “yes okay” in response to many questions… Questions, which I knew he didn’t understand. I finally asked him what his job was and he didn’t understand me. So I looked in my pocket dictionary and pointed out the word “job”. With a big grin on his face “oohhh!! Work me huh?” … “Yes, yes.. Work you! What is your work, job” . Duc thought for a minute, as if he was trying to translate a response “teesa! Teesa!!!” . “You make T-shirts?”, I responded while holding out my t-shirt. “Khong! (“no” in Vietnamese) .. uh No!! Teesa, student”. .. “Oh really? What do you teach?” . “I teesa tieng anh”. I thought for a second and realized that “tieng anh” means “English”. Very confused, I asked “you teach English?”. “yeh univesty! I teesa Englees Haiphong Univesty”. … Again, “you’re an English professor at Haiphong University?”. “ I work Englees teesa Haiphong Univesty”. I broke down and couldn’t contain my laughter. He looked shocked and I felt horrible about it. I bought him another beer and thought to myself “man I hope he’s joking”.

I loved that!!!!

Poor man, maybe he never had the opportunity to improve his English... I wonder about his students though... :D

frengo · Post by **frengo** » Fri Mar 25, 2005 9:43 pm

Please don't quit! I'm working hard in these days, so I can't come to the forums, but will read everything in the next days...

Elba · Post by **Elba** » Fri Mar 25, 2005 11:00 pm

Jimmy,
I must tell you that I think you were a proud and arrogant boy wich only interest were... I do´t know.. but now you seem like a intelligent boy. Your stories like me too much and I hope yu cointinuing writting them. :R: :R: :R:
Only try to writte short paragraphs, wich make the reading light. ;) ;) ;)
How many language you speak?

Essie, you are a talent. Tell me, are you journalist? That no means that only journalist are talents, but you writte very good, your stories have a special style, something than capture my attention. Tell us more about the english teacher please, or tell us another story Ok.
If you writte for a newspaper at canada, please give me the URL. ;) ;) ;)

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 4:21 am

Elba, me? Arrogant?? I am far from arrogant. I have a self-esteem problem and I'm sure essie or Lalee will vouch for that. They should be pretty fed up with me by now!

I speak 4 languages. I speak Cantonese, a bit of Mandarin, a bit of Vietnamese, and, of course, English, which is my superior language.

Oh, and I speak Spanish too, but only Lalee can understand my Spanish.

Dixie · Post by **Dixie** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 11:27 am

pinkfloyd76 wrote:1. I would never believe the story about a man who teaches English in university and speaks irt such a bad way!!! Stupid for me. Immpossible.

Hehehehe that can be possible... I will always remember my American Literature professor in university. He spoke such bad English!!! His grammar was perfect, but his pronunciation was HORRIBLE!!!! There was a time when we had some American students in class, and they could hardly understand him!!!!!! The worst of all was he thought his English was so perfect... Oh man I will always remember that professor. I sometimes come accross him when I get off work...

Dixie · Post by **Dixie** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 11:38 am

Unknownsu wrote: I speak 4 languages. I speak Cantonese, a bit of Mandarin, a bit of Vietnamese, and, of course, English, which is my superior language.

Let me get this straight: I thought Cantonese and Mandarin were both dialects of Chinese. Is that right?

Lalee · Post by **Lalee** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 3:36 pm

Unknownsu wrote:Elba, me? Arrogant?? I am far from arrogant. I have a self-esteem problem and I'm sure essie or Lalee will vouch for that. They should be pretty fed up with me by now!

I speak 4 languages. I speak Cantonese, a bit of Mandarin, a bit of Vietnamese, and, of course, English, which is my superior language.

Oh, and I speak Spanish too, but only Lalee can understand my Spanish.

Fed up with you?? Never, never. Hey, your self-esteem has boosted since you met me, right? At least a little bit?
Yeah people, you should listen to Jimmy speaking Spanish. His accent is so cute!

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 4:13 pm

Dixie wrote:Let me get this straight: I thought Cantonese and Mandarin were both dialects of Chinese. Is that right?

No, Dixie, you are right. They're both dialects of Chinese. I didn't want to get technical. But you must understand, a person who strickly speaks Mandarin will not understand a person speaking Cantonese; and vice versa.

Cantonese is a weird dialect. The written and spoken are almost completely different.

essie · Post by **essie** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 6:15 pm

See Jimmy!! They don’t want us to quit, so keep on writing darn you! I’ll be posting my story soon!

pinkfloyd76 wrote:I would like to notice some facts (probably):
1. I would never believe the story about a man who teaches English in university and speaks irt such a bad way!!! Stupid for me. Impossible. .... All in all I would never believe any story about old half-idiot teaching English in any university! Probably the man was totally unsober and just wanted to have some money or things like that.

Lol! I agree with Dixie>

Dixie wrote:Hehehehe that can be possible... I will always remember my American Literature professor in university. He spoke such bad English!!! His grammar was perfect, but his pronunciation was HORRIBLE!!!!

In foreign countries, it’s actually very common that an English teacher doesn’t speak English very well. In fact, I’ve met a few people in Vietnam that had a better vocabulary than I and their written structure was amazing, but when it came to speaking, very hard to understand. The funny thing about Duc (the English professor) is that I met him a few more times during the first trip and some more during my second trip to Vietnam, which was two years later. His English had improved a bit by then. A bit only though! He’s actually a very funny guy. His mannerisms remind me of an old Persian comedian. :P

Elba wrote:Essie, you are a talent. Tell me, are you journalist? That no means that only journalist are talents, but you write very good, your stories have a special style, something than capture my attention. Tell us more about the English teacher please, or tell us another story Ok. If you write for a newspaper at Canada, please give me the URL. ;) ;) ;)

I’m glad you enjoy my stories :) , but I’m not a journalist… In fact, if I applied at a newspaper, they’d laugh at me

. I have worked for newspapers though. I delivered newspapers when I was in grade 6. I also did some design work for newspaper adds once :P

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 8:40 pm

essie wrote:In foreign countries, it’s actually very common that an English teacher doesn’t speak English very well. In fact, I’ve met a few people in Vietnam that had a better vocabulary than I and their written structure was amazing.

Same here. I get very intimidated by people who has more knowledge of English than I, especially, when English is not their mother tongue. I just stare blankly at them in awe.

In Vietnam, I don't think you need credentials or knowledge in your profession, all you need is connections. ;)

essie wrote:In fact, if I applied at a newspaper, they’d laugh at me

It's true, essie's English sucks big ass!

Elba · Post by **Elba** » Sat Mar 26, 2005 11:23 pm

Pinkfloyd76,

I undestand that you can´t belive the Essie story, arround that story could be lots of possibilities abouth the meaning of the words the "english teacher" said.
What happen? that in many countries people only have "some knowledge" of english, some esential sentences, but they want to talk with foreings, maybe that fact give them a level of importance, they try to speak with a foreing and after that they get a story to their grandsons, or to the women and men of the town they live. Then they have someting to tell in the bored afternoond at their towns.
Maybe that happened with the tacher at vietnam.
As I told you, there are thousand of possibilities in that story, but there is a fact. The story is funny, and captured the attention of all the ec members that post a reply, YOU among US.
Then the story get the objetive, let us know and share, an anecdote.

Unknownsu · Post by **Unknownsu** » Sun Mar 27, 2005 1:07 am

Please, people, let’s try not to suppress opinions in this topic, ok? This thread was started for entertainment purposes only. :)

Pinkfloyd76, I am sure the professor you are talking about is a reputable individual but just because she would not approach a foreigner does not mean everyone would not approach a foreigner. Many non-native English speakers would kill for the opportunity to practice their English with foreigners and that is exactly what happened to Essie. The Vietnamese are a proud, extremely friendly, and conservative race. Many Vietnamese locals would approach a tourist for friendly chatter in the blink of an eye. My appearance does not come off as an English speaking person, but once a student of English realizes I have a non-accented command, it’s hard for me to stop them from conversing with me in English. That's why when someone asks me whether I speak English, I almost always reply, "Just a little." :P

Essie’s story is real, I can assure everyone that. However, how his story is to be translated is solely up to all the readers in here.

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