Some important tips for you

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Golfygirl
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Re: to Admiral....

Postby Golfygirl » Tue Jan 10, 2006 1:18 am

tikay wrote:I am going to write this down as i write it to you and hope that this is as good as the stuff I submitted before.

I was saying that I wake up in the morning and the whole process of getting out of bed takes about twenty minutes...i listen to the pidgins in my window...they purr to me and we sometimes have a little banter...(smile)
i begin to think about things....this morning I thought of things that i could write in here like ....
our favorite pet names for the people we love and care about...that would be a fun post right? (like I call my daughter sarah-berrys among others, while a friend (once) calls her little girl juice-box..
then I was thinking that I might post another thread about words we make up,
excuse me for a minute.......


quote to: Tikay and Admiral
Just marvelous! Ya'll are very good writers. I am new to the english club. I can see I am going to have alot of interesting examples to follow. Sorry, but my english is elementary, but am hoping to get better. Ok? :D Thanks for giving me good reading.

tikay
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Thanks...

Postby tikay » Tue Jan 10, 2006 2:13 am

Hello there! You are welcome to add your ideas on love too!
I am just here practicing my writing and making a few friends.
Nice of you to give us a compliment.Dont worry about the spelling or any bad english that is why you just come here and practice! I was born in Tennessee.

Admiral

definition of real love

Postby Admiral » Tue Jan 10, 2006 4:18 pm

From Paracelsus (not from me):
Who doesn't know, he doesn't love.
Who can't do anything, doesn't know anything.
But who knows,
he loves, notices and also sees.
The more knowledge one has,
the greater is the love.
Who thinks that all fruits will be ripe at the same time with the strawberries,
he doesn't understand anything of the grapes.



Human being is very depressed. They have to work hard to earn their living, to care for their chidren, their wife. They don't only have to earn money, they have to work fastly, buy a house, buy a car, like if there is an invisible hand controlling them.
In such a society, people will feel that all love is taken away from them, so he feels lonely. And whenever he feels lonely, he dreams of a girl who will stand beside him, encouraging him for going on.
So, the need of human being is not to be lonely. He will search "the other part of him", to feel complete.
And that is love.

But love is not the showing of childishness.
It is not that one makes himself to an individable part of another one, like: He is everything, I am nothing, nothing else than a part of him. With this attitude, he gives up his own individuality, he makes himself to an instrument of the other, to a thing beyond himself.
It is not that one makes another one to an individable part of himself. He wants to get rid of his loneliness by doing it, but as a consequence he will be dependant from the one he controls, the same as the one he controls will be dependent on him.

Real love is a coalition, where the own person is kept.
Love will let him feel complete, and to be himself at the same time.
That is real love, whether you love a girl, or you love football, your job, or anything else.
Last edited by Admiral on Tue Jan 10, 2006 4:37 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Admiral

Postby Admiral » Tue Jan 10, 2006 4:29 pm

(same with me, I was born in China)

tikay
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Admiral!

Postby tikay » Tue Jan 10, 2006 7:09 pm

Funny ...i had no idea where you were from!
China.wow...One of my very,very favorite people in the world is (in Hawaii) Hawaiian-Chinese-Caucasion....his name is Godfrey.
I was sort of wondering where you were from...but did not think to ask you. I told Golfygirl..where I was born... because I am from the same sort of place as she is, Tennessee is the next state up from Georgia, in the south-east United States.
If she is from there, well, we will have a whole lot in common. If she is living there from somewhere else well...maybe not, but maybe we do.
The great thing is that you are becoming my buddy and I am enjoying myself getting to know everyone in here.

Today I wanted to add something to the list but i have to go out and see what letter I am at I believe it is O. Oh boy!
be right back!

tikay
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The letter O...

Postby tikay » Tue Jan 10, 2006 7:25 pm

Admiral thanks for your post! That is good. I really like this thread.i think maybe it would be great if others were adding to it but this is good. They may add to it later. I am a little impatient especially for someone who is really laid back in so many other ways...my house is full of nice things but it is usually messy, not dirty but messy...everything clean but all over the place -especially books! Need a friend who likes to clean up my place ( I used to clean up all my friends houses.)

UH OH! It is O...
Are they going to consider it smut if I get racy???
How about this.
O) Just go to the site known as amazon dot com and put orgasm in the search engine box. Get one or two of these informative and fascinating books. ( 'nuf said )

Thats where I get most of my books anyway... because their books are very easy to afford when you are on a tight budget...but not the new titles...just the ones where there is great competion for barely used books, that are often just like new,these can be just a dollar or two and are still like new. I used to get many at thrift shops but that had so many less choices and they are more damaged usually.
love to everyone...your friend, -Tracey

Admiral

practice of real love

Postby Admiral » Fri Jan 13, 2006 2:32 pm

From Paracelsus (not from me):
Who doesn't know, he doesn't love.
Who can't do anything, doesn't know anything.
But who knows,
he loves, notices and also sees.
The more knowledge one has,
the greater is the love.
Who thinks that all fruits will be ripe at the same time with the strawberries,
he doesn't understand anything of the grapes.
(Why I quote this is because everything I say could be related to this poem)


As I talked about theory, now I talk about practise.

So, to be more precise: Only to think of oneself is also stupid.
There is a girl you like very much, then, according to the definition (see last post), you should
1. not deactivate your brain and
2. not deactivate her brain.

So, if you really want her, you should act rationally and you should also give her the chance to act rationally. There are 4 rules I repeat because I think it's stupid to say where you have to look at in tikay's post.

1. care for her
Why does somebody care for his car? -Because he owned hard-working money for it.
Why does somebody care for a plant? -Because he watered it every day and watched it growing big.
Somebody loves things for which he made an effort, and he makes effort for things he love. ( :mrgreen: So I don't often say that I love anyone)

2. feel responsible for her
I think I don't have to explain this. This is not a duty, but something voluntary. That means you have to know what she likes or what she wants, otherwise you don't have to wonder that she looks for somebody else.

3. respect her
That has nothing to do with fear of a monster, that is the ability to see the girl who she really is. That means that you really want to know about her, what she likes, what lacks she has, whether you are sure about her and so on.
However concerning a girl you mostly have to know about her emotional needs.
That also means that one himself has to be able to live independently, otherwise it will end in someone controlling someone else, or two blind persons running around somewhere. That's mostly why I'm against having sex at 14 or 15.

4. brake the imaginary picture
You know, some guys see a girl who is very very pretty, and they chase for her. Some girls see a boy who doesn't look good and have ugly stuff on, so they think he is reliable.
That's a very wrong attitude.
We have to brake this image, and to want her although this image is broken.
But I think we will be really stupid if we do 1.-3. to a person who we don't know that much, before whom there is still a prejudice of us.
Last edited by Admiral on Fri Jan 13, 2006 3:31 pm, edited 3 times in total.

Admiral

Postby Admiral » Fri Jan 13, 2006 2:44 pm

tikay, you never know whose house is more messed up.
For example me. I normally have to search 2 until 3 hours to find my exercise books.
So if you come here to tidy up my flat, I will tidy up your house. Good offer?

tikay
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Dear Admiral...

Postby tikay » Fri Jan 13, 2006 4:16 pm

That is just the best offer. It is my kind of thinking.
And the post before that is really great. Better than expected...no joke.
I think that we two may be able to say we started a good thread with this subject.
I am going to have to be honest I didn't expect so much understanding from you. i thought maybe yes, maybe no. It seems you understand so completely and now you are showing me even more...and you are just today...home depot and.....fixing up parts of the house. Keep up the writing you are good. I definately appreciate things like that. So please continue!
I am up very early because I have a whole lot to do and my tiny woke me... Sarah saying she needs to blow her nose...so she is a little bit sick again. I am going to have to go make her some tea now, she is all snuggely in the blanket and her Peter Pan (& Tinkerbell) movie is on and she is smiling at me.
I will be back with coffee and my P,Q,R's....or some.
bye 4 now

Golfygirl
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Re: practice of real love

Postby Golfygirl » Fri Jan 13, 2006 8:14 pm

Admiral wrote:
From Paracelsus (not from me):
Who doesn't know, he doesn't love.
Who can't do anything, doesn't know anything.
But who knows,
he loves, notices and also sees.
The more knowledge one has,
the greater is the love.
Who thinks that all fruits will be ripe at the same time with the strawberries,
he doesn't understand anything of the grapes.
(Why I quote this is because everything I say could be related to this poem)


As I talked about theory, now I talk about practise.

So, to be more precise: Only to think of oneself is also stupid.
There is a girl you like very much, then, according to the definition (see last post), you should
1. not deactivate your brain and
2. not deactivate her brain.

So, if you really want her, you should act rationally and you should also give her the chance to act rationally. There are 4 rules I repeat because I think it's stupid to say where you have to look at in tikay's post.

1. care for her
Why does somebody care for his car? -Because he owned hard-working money for it.
Why does somebody care for a plant? -Because he watered it every day and watched it growing big.
Somebody loves things for which he made an effort, and he makes effort for things he love. ( :mrgreen: So I don't often say that I love anyone)

2. feel responsible for her
I think I don't have to explain this. This is not a duty, but something voluntary. That means you have to know what she likes or what she wants, otherwise you don't have to wonder that she looks for somebody else.

3. respect her
That has nothing to do with fear of a monster, that is the ability to see the girl who she really is. That means that you really want to know about her, what she likes, what lacks she has, whether you are sure about her and so on.
However concerning a girl you mostly have to know about her emotional needs.
That also means that one himself has to be able to live independently, otherwise it will end in someone controlling someone else, or two blind persons running around somewhere. That's mostly why I'm against having sex at 14 or 15.

4. brake the imaginary picture
You know, some guys see a girl who is very very pretty, and they chase for her. Some girls see a boy who doesn't look good and have ugly stuff on, so they think he is reliable.
That's a very wrong attitude.
We have to brake this image, and to want her although this image is broken.
But I think we will be really stupid if we do 1.-3. to a person who we don't know that much, before whom there is still a prejudice of us.


Much thoughts here!!!!Talk about analyzing!!!It seems to me a very accurate picture!!!

I wish I had know all that before now in my life. Admiral and Tikay, ya'll are amazing.

What Admiral & Tikay has written is proof that a college education is needed in this life.

Remember my advice here!!!!If you want a short cut in life----GO TO COLLEGE!!

College will prepare you for the basic understandings of life and how to get along very well in this world we live in.

College will prepare you for things that will take you an entire lifetime to learn if you don't go to college.

Do you hear me? Do you comprehend? AN ENTIRE LIFETIME!!

Admiral---you are admirable :)

tikay
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Re: Dear Admiral...

Postby tikay » Sat Jan 14, 2006 4:18 am

[quote="tikay"]you understand so completely and now you are showing me even more...and you are just today...home depot and.....fixing up parts of the house.

hello......tikay what are you talking about???
I dont know something went wrong right there...
I was trying to say I have some errends to do and we are fixing the floor in one bathroom and need more lino-tiles so must go to home depot....but how that got in the middle of my complimenting you... well that is just wierd ...and where the rest of it went...???? (dunno)
I was distracted because a friend came over and stayed a while...we were talking about how I could use some help over in aisle seventeen .
..false pro-fits, parallel reality, and suicides....Admiral?
"clean up on asile seventeen! " ...how I could use a rescue over there....hahahah!

then I had to go on to the promised play-park and the Mac-donalds for a happy meal, and the Home Depot...when we got back we fell on the bed and slept away the rest of today.... its my night off from school.... and I hear it is friday the thrteenth!
well.... :? lets see if it gets :twisted: twisted.

well another great compliment from the happy supportive Golfygirl....(you are nice) Thanks.
I am going to go to that asile 17...and see if I am getting in more trouble over there :)
bye 4 now
Last edited by tikay on Sat Jan 14, 2006 9:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Admiral

anylysis of real love

Postby Admiral » Sat Jan 14, 2006 2:01 pm

From the muslim poet Rumi:
Has the lightning of love struck this heart, so know that the other heart is full of love, too.

This is the result of the practise of real love.

However we have to ask at which time the lightning comes down.
The answer is dependent on the lovers brain, what type of girls he likes etc.
But to get the girl, he has to use some methods I have talked about before.

So we have two points:
1. It depents on the brains which specific type of girl one likes. So love is individual.
2. There is a general rule how to get the love.
So love is only a technique.

If someone follows or both follow 2.
That is what makes this topic so difficult. If someone acts or both act like 2, then he or they will end up in marrying and divorcing and marrying again and divorce again. Or at least both will never love the other one in their whole life, because the girl wants a guy who understands her. (see explanations of tikay)

If someone follows or both follow 1.
If someone acts like 1, then he will end up in being childish. (See "definition of real love", tue jan 10)
If both act like 1, then this will be a catastrophe. :lol: Because then both will have forgotten that they are living in a society, or they will build a barricade around them against the society.

As a consequence, love is only possible if both of the lovers move themself out of their own thinking, that means if both have a point between 1 and 2,
and if they try to connect their two thinkings in respect of the society's rules, no explanation needed, because we live in it.

So, everything and all summed up, the result is: If I really love someone, then I love all people, then I love the whole world, then I love the life.

Or specialized:

If I say "I love you" to somebody, then I also have to say "I love inside you everybody else, I love the whole world because of you, I also love myself inside you."

-end-

tikay
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so super cool

Postby tikay » Sat Jan 14, 2006 9:36 pm

all I can say is Bravo! (standing ovation) applause and...love!
you are quite the thinking man. LOVE it.

tikay
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P) Q) .....& R)

Postby tikay » Tue Jan 17, 2006 1:57 am

Watch your P's and Q's....that is a saying that i hear comes from old England...it stands for watch your pints and quarts.
which since we are on these letters I will be forced to connect to drinking.

P) Please dont drink in excess on your date or outing because you are feeling nervous about being around her. It is better to admit you are nervous, realise that it is natural, and move on...we dont like to see every man we go out with use the same excuse for getting smashed...really drunk. It is hard to enjoy time with people who have had too much booze, so lets just admit we are nervous and not drown ourselves in alcohol.

Q) Questions are the best way to get to know someone and if you have thought of a few things you would like to know before the date that will be a good thing to say if everything gets so quiet it becomes uncomfortable...time to use those...even if you write them down and keep them in your pocket....so you dont forget them. Just keep them simple and when she asks you some maybe you will be ready with some cute and clever answers that show us you really prepared to sweep us off our feet.

R) If the date is not going well, if it is sort of dull and you want to spice it up...rely on the traditional flowers. Maybe choose a movie place near a florist or a resturant where they sell flowers close by. Have them pre-ordered or collect some just for her...very romantic! Otherwise, you could have some in the back of your car, and pull them out before the night is over to cheer up the mood, depending on the weather. Of course you can always save them for your mom or? ...If for instance she was a total nightmare and obviously did not like you and spent the evening letting you know this. (In that case arrange to take her home early.)

ahmads
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Postby ahmads » Tue Jan 17, 2006 9:57 am

waw ,there are many good tips
Tikey can you participate in another topics if you want .

Admiral

Postby Admiral » Tue Jan 17, 2006 3:49 pm

You CAN, but let my opinions alone!

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illusion
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Postby illusion » Wed Jan 18, 2006 4:26 pm

yeh yeh really nice...but sadly when it comes to love no rules are actually at stake. It's just the matter of heart and instincts. I just have this one golden rule: Don't have any rules!!! and somehow I can always stick to that one. Though of course the tips may be found very useful...

shokin
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Re: tips for boys and men

Postby shokin » Wed Jan 18, 2006 5:19 pm

Break the silence law ! :

I hate all the "shut up", "no word or I will ...", etc. The mobbing kills, let us talk about ! :evil:

Respect before all ! :evil: :

The respect of dignity and identity of each being should be and is not enough. If you don't respect a person, you make this person lose confidence and self-confidence.

Don't become big brother ! :evil: :

Trying to control all, you lose all control. You are denying the freedom, the sovereignty, the life.



Responsibility :

Assume the what you did choose AND the what you did not choosse (you did not forsee by taking an engagement).

Communication :

Without communication, no mutual understanding, no group, only individuals (individualismus in the society then chaos of the society, of the group).

Action :

Without action, no effect. Find your goals and think about only them. Orientate your action according to your goals (not according the advertising). Be pro-active, take initiatives, create and believe. Crear = Creer. Acting is keeping contact with the your reality (your potential and your limits).

Humour :

Laugh, finding jokes, caricatures, laughing about yourself : I cannot dance but when I try they laught. You can dance very well. So, why are people laughing ? because I keep trying to dance... :lol: If I stop trying to dance, why do people keep laughing ? because I've fallen to the ground. :lol: :lol: :lol: Why do I smile ? becaue one beautiful girl helps me standing up back. :lol: :mrgreen: :lol:

Shokin

tikay
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Postby tikay » Wed Jan 18, 2006 8:16 pm

Thanks to everybody for your added messages. The thread was under hey sexy lady so I guess some of you have just found it. Shokin I was not playing at big brother to anyone but Admiral who first asks in the thread for my advise with a woman he is into. I am not trying to say that my little ideas are for everybody anyway. Just if they can help anybody to enjoy them. I think they are pretty good ideas from a woman with experience with men....but not the law!
Please dont take it too seroiusly because like all of the things I share I try to keep it light and stay away from preaching sounding b.s. I am no-bodys big brother or sister....i was just having a good time trying to share what I know to be some good advise to a young man.
It funny to me that you follow your angry notes with some good advise. I like the part about you and dancing the most.
I did not really get the angry words...they did not fit in here for me....but that is just me.
I think we should change the name of the thread so we dont offend others ...so people dont think we are being pushy or something. The moderator named it this. Speak to Arale about that one.
Peace........Ahmads ...hello friend!
I do participate in the other forums and watch all the threads I have been in so that takes up all my extra time for now. If you want to talk to me you must go to the threads where I already am chatting okay? (there are many)
Love to all.

ahmads
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Postby ahmads » Wed Jan 18, 2006 9:07 pm

tikay wrote:Peace........Ahmads ...hello friend!
I do participate in the other forums and watch all the threads I have been in so that takes up all my extra time for now. If you want to talk to me you must go to the threads where I already am chatting okay?

ok I will :D

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illusion
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Postby illusion » Wed Jan 18, 2006 11:02 pm

oh you know I've also forgotten to add one tip that I always bear in mind which I stick to all of the time... Do whatever you want but make no harm to other people by your behaviour... I think it's a simple thing to remember and it does help a lot. I use that tip in everyday life, whatever I do I try to think of other people and the consequences of my actions...


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