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behnam
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The Smell of Love! (Part Two)

Postby behnam » Fri Dec 20, 2013 11:20 am

..............

About loyalty, let me say bravely and safely that you cannot find even one loyal man in the world. Loyalty is against men's nature. Forget those candy-coated words that men often say to their lovers. It is one of the rules in the game which is called life! How can you expect someone not to eat anything when s/he has got stomach? :lol: Women should understand that men are totally different from them. They must be different. Nothing is wrong with those differences.

Men fool women and women fool men! This is a historical game. Let's not fantasize about love and lovers. Love is a feeling to fool people into marrying and starting families. This beautiful word is invited to be said in order to fulfill our needs. Necessity is the mother of invention. :lol: From the beginning of the history men have learned they must lie in order to get closer to women. If they said, "I've got something, and you've got something else. These complete each other. In other words, I need yours, you need mine. Let's ...!", :lol: certainly women wouldn't agree. Men might have to apply force to fulfill their needs. Some men might use force to get what they needed, but little by little they have learned to pursue a different strategy in order to derive much pleasure from women! Therefore, they have put their heads together and invited 'love'. Instead of saying directly what you want or revealing your needs, it is better to coat your intention with sugar or some sweet substance to tame women! 'I love you' is a powerful sentence! Some naughty advisers advise people to learn 'I love you' in different languages. Well, this is a useful tool for people who want to taste different... Different what? I don't know... :lol: :lol: :lol:

Thank you for reading.


All the best,
Behnam, 20 December, 2013
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Happy The Longest Night of The Year!

Postby behnam » Sat Dec 21, 2013 11:24 am

Hi,

Tonight is the longest night of the year on the Northern Hemisphere. Iranian people celebrate this night. They sit around and eat dried nuts and fruits. This night is called 'Yalda'. It is a girl name too. In Iran, you can find many women who are named 'Yalda'. Iranian Azerbaijanis call it Chilla Gejasi, which means the beginning of the first 40 days of winter. For further information please either go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yald%C4%81 or ask our expert Mohsen!


به صد یلدا الهی زنده باشی
انار و سیب و انگور خورده باشی
اگر یلدای دیگر من نباشم
تو باشی و تو باشی و تو باشی


Happy YALDA to all Iranian people in all over the world!

All the best,
Behnam, 21st December, 2013
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Happy Birthday Behnam! :)

Postby behnam » Sat Dec 21, 2013 11:47 am

Hi Behnam,

How are you? I hope you are fine. A little bird said that it is your birthday. This is just to say a warm 'Happy Birthday' to you.


Shab-e-Yalda kimin ballidi adim,
Aziz dustlar olmamisham sagham man.


I am as famous as Yalda night, my dear friends I am still alive!

Best wishes,
Your old friends:
Roya, Marina, Elham, Amal, Mohsen, Veronica, Kamelia, Setayesh, Andrew, Rosa, Maryam, Mitra, Adelaida, Zita, Asal, Nilufar, Nahid, Reyhaneh, Parvin, Roghayyeh, Fatemeh, and others!

Describing a pleasure is half of enjoying it! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


All the best,
Behnam, 21 December, 2013
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You Are Not the Same as Yesterday You Were

Postby Mohsen » Sat Dec 21, 2013 4:29 pm

Once a year I get the chance
To wish you birthday cheer.
It pleases me no end to say,
I wish you another great year.
So happy birthday to you ,Behnam,
From the bottom of my heart.
And may your good times multiply,
Till they’re flying off the chart!


B.Wishes
Mohsen and his friends

Barry , Harry , Jerry , Larry , Mary , Perry , Terri

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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Elham » Sat Dec 21, 2013 5:24 pm

Hi dear Behnam,

You don't know how much I have missed you, you know nothing about how's going with your old friend, a girl who was used to be called a close and nice friend....

But you should know sth... and you know it for sure....


Happy Birthday,

Wish you all the best in the world,

Eli

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We Are Still Friends!

Postby behnam » Tue Dec 24, 2013 11:37 am

Hi Elham,

How are you? How is life in Najafabad? I hope everything is going well with you. Here, the weather is dangerously polluted. I suffer from this polluted weather. I feel some pain in my lungs when there are pollutants in the air. I am wearing a filter, but it doesn't help.

Thank you so much for your nice post which was, as always, full of feelings. I'd like to confess that we are still friends. Nothing can kill our pure human feelings to each other. We may make some conclusions or have some expectations in accordance with our assumptions, which are usually different from the facts, but we shouldn't let those things break the tree of unconditional friendship. This tree is holy since it reflects our past. We have to water it and protect it from damages.

Well, the philosophy of friendship may differ from person to person and from time to time, but what matters is the existence of a philosophy in friendship which gives us the excuse to either form a new friendship or keep the old one. I believe, as long as people have got a philosophy, no matter it is an extensive one or a limited one, they should follow it provided that the philosophy brings them some benefits, either spiritual or material. Oh, this subject is delicate. I may make you confused. Let's move on it! {-:

Posting in this thread, using my favourite colour in writing, may make you think that I am the same Behnam, with the same passion and full of enthusiasm, but you are one hundred percent wrong! I am not the same Behnam. White hairs on my cheeks and chin loudly say that Behnam is old. Not only does my body yell that its owner is old, but also my feelings say that leaving time is close to coming. Actually, I am writing to inform my friends that I am still alive. This comes from my loyalty to friendship and friends. Nothing else can keep me here!

We are still friends, either you want it or not!

All the best,
Behnam, 24 December, 2013
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Merry Christmas!

Postby behnam » Thu Dec 26, 2013 3:27 am

Hi,

I'd like to say
'Merry Christmas' to all my Christian friends. May Jesus Christ, Prophet of love & peace, bless us all on this day. Wishing Merry Christmas to those celebrating, especially Iranian Christians.

All the best,
Behnam, 25 December, 2013
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Answers!

Postby behnam » Thu Dec 26, 2013 10:22 am

Hi,

An old friend of mine has put off messages on my 'Yahoo Messenger' account and has asked two important questions. First of all, I'd like to thank this good friend for reading the posts carefully and paying attention to them closely.

The first question is about my philosophy of friendship. I've written that the philosophy of friendship may change with the times. That's normal. In addition to that, people can develop their philosophies. When a philosophy doesn't work in a particular situation, we have to either change it or change the situation. Determined people first try to change or review the situation. If they cannot change it, they wisely develop their philosophies to make them adapted to the situation.

The kinds of relationship between people can be different. Some people are our relatives. Some others are our colleagues. Some people are our friends. Some of them are special to us. Some are strangers, etc. Among friends, some of them are close friends. Some others are not that close. Like many quantitative parameters, friendship can be quantified by some numbers. For example, we can give number 100 to an ideal friendship, and number 0 to a neutral person in our lives. Definitely, our enemies will fall into minus side of this scale and will get negative numbers.

Ideal friendship isn't an absolute thing. People have different ideas about it. Its definition varies from person to person. Someone, in his/her frame of reference, may give 100 to his/her friendship with somebody, but this person(somebody:) ) may quantify the friendship with another number. Well, people have different frame of references, consequent results of different philosophies.


What is philosophy? The meaning of philosophy is 'the attitude or set of ideas that guides the behaviour of a person or organization'. We can change our ideas or modify them or make them more suitable for the situation we are in. In other words, we can change our frame of reference, our scale of measurement.

The second question was actually a comment on my view about the definition of love which has come in the post written to dear Amal. As I have written, love is only a feeling young people experience it when the nature makes them ready(fool them) to look for their Mr/Mrs right, to get married and start families. This is noun-negotiable. This is not optional. We don't choose this feeling. The nature gives it to us. By the way, knowing this fact should not make us disappointed, because it is something common among us. All I am saying is briefly that 'love is an instinctive feeling'. It is the trick of nature to fool us and cause us to marry and keep the generation going. Nature knows how to fool us. She is (has been)successful.

Another friend of mine has asked the meaning of "..my feeling says leaving time is close to coming...". The meaning is clear, but maybe it has been shocking. Well, when you have white hairs on your cheeks, chin, chest, ..., it means you are old. When you've got a broken heart, and you suffer from a heart operation, you feel that it is time to leave this earthy world. We will all leave this world, sooner or later. This is a fact. We shouldn't fool ourselves. Don't worry! Bad things never die! (بادنجان بم آفت نداره ) :lol: :lol: {-: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 26 December, 2013
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Mohsen » Thu Dec 26, 2013 8:17 pm


Hi Behnam,
Hope you are fine, it is said that a person is young while he feels love,and you have time as long as you love.
You said that love is an instinctive feeling , I agree, but it is not like feeling thirst or hunger. Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. also love needs its conditions, the sexual desire would be crucial to create the love. Normally love creates between two opposite sex. What makes two opposite sex to be in love , the sexual desire is an instinctive feeling ,so it creates love. My reason is why love always creates between two opposite sexes.

The second point is the environment. For example a man who works with several girls in his work place ,he has working relations with her colleagues ,but there is more possible circumstances for his madness , beautiful gardens with scenic beauty providing an icing on the cake to the strong feeling of love and blossoming romance between a girl and a boy head over heels in love
The third point is the movies , people believe that their real world as what they watch in a movie, the stories which are shown on the celluloid about love to create a misconception intentionally or unintentionally that love is a beautiful experience and an inevitable part of our lives.

All the best
Mohsen

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Discussion!

Postby behnam » Fri Dec 27, 2013 9:52 am

Mohsen wrote:Normally love creates between two opposite sex. What makes two opposite sex to be in love , the sexual desire is an instinctive feeling ,so it creates love. My reason is why love always creates between two opposite sexes.


Hi Mohsen,

Many thanks for expressing your opinion about the topic. I totally agree with your first paragraph. If we dig deeper to see what creates love, we will immediately realise that two hormones are playing the main role. According to scientists, Testosterone and Oestrogen are responsible for the mail and female qualities respectively. How those substances work? That is mysterious. However, it is a proven fact that if you change the levels of those hormones in someone's body, their male or female qualities will change. For example, if the level of Testosterone goes up in a girl's body, she may have beard and mustache. For the same reason, Testosterone has caused me to get bald. :lol: {-: :lol:

Your second and third paragraph both are different from the first one. In the first paragraph you are explaining love, but in the rest of the post you are mentioning to two nice points which are quite different from the discussed topic. Those points are actually two possible answers to the potential question 'what triggers the love?' or 'What makes the love start?'

Talking about love is not easy, since it is one of the signs of God, as He Has said in the Holy Koran, Rome-22. However, from philosophy point of view, it is quite obvious that necessity creates love. Generally speaking, incompleteness creates needs, and needs create movements towards fulfillment. These are steps towards perfection!

Let me digress for a moment. Physics is really beautiful. Physics helps people think beautifully. If we want to understand the universe, we have to know Physics. If we want to be a good physicist we have to deeply understand cause and effect. Not only do we have to understand it, but also we have to love and respect this main principle of the universe. :lol: {-: :lol:

In order to get more, we have to analyse those two responsible hormones. How do they work? What are those hormones made from? When I was studying at university, I got interested in Physiology of Arthur Guyton. I read some chapters. It was(is) a useful book. However, nobody can answer to this question, "What causes the right opposite sexes(people who have the right amount of those hormones in their bodies) to attract each other?" This is mysterious and miraculous. To make people have an image about it I often say, "Suppose men and women are like empty egg cartons. They have mountains and valleys. The mountains go inside the valleys easily and they become stable. This is what we can see in the world of materials. Now, suppose such mountains and valleys exist in our spirits(in the spiritual world which is not deniable). Although they are invisible, the effect of them is sensible, and that is the attraction we feel and call it love."

Something crossed my mind a few seconds ago. As you may now, in terms of their behaviour in an external magnetic field, materials categorized into three groups. They are either Paramagnetic, or Diamagnetic, or Ferromagnetic. Paramagnetism is a form of magnetism whereby certain materials are attracted by an externally applied magnetic field. In contrast with this behavior, diamagnetic materials are repelled by magnetic fields. Ferromagnetism is the basic mechanism by which certain materials (such as iron) form permanent magnets, or are attracted to magnets. Now, suppose God has created(has put) an external magnetic filed in the universe. Philosophically speaking, we can consider necessity(incompleteness) as an external magnetic field. Now, consider one of the hormones( Testosterone or Oestrogen) to behave like Paramagnetic materials and the other one to behave like Diamagnetic objects. These materials may attract each other when they are exposed to an external field which we have already named them 'incompleteness'! Wonderful, fantastic! :lol: :lol: :lol:

All the best,
Behnam, 27 December, 2013
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby [amal] » Sat Dec 28, 2013 1:28 am

Hi Behnam,

How are you?

Thanks dear for writing that "explanation post" to me and other friends.. I was too worried about you and I even write an off but there was no answer!
Your words were verrrrry shocking! I couldn't sleep that night when I read them! YOU ARE OLD???!!!! And you are speaking about leaving time???!!! Oh my god!!! just some white hears on your chest let you feel so??!!!!!! What should my father say???!!! He is older than you and he had a heart operation, too. He is still working and ,by the way, his job is very hard and important! But he doesn't complain and he doesn't speak about leaving time!!!

Dear Behnam again I am sorry for being late in reply, I am not stone-hearted but my grandma is sick and we took her to the hospital. Above that, the electricity was off last two days... And NO, I didn't get married because these days there are a lot of males but there is no men! I will tell you the rest of that story when we chat inshallah..

Anyway, thanksss a lot for " The Smell Of Love!", I loved reading the both parts, I even read them many times... You are smart! "as usual" {-; I love your life philosophy...

In one of your posts, you were confused about what field of books you can write, so why don't you write about your life philosophy?! I am sure it would be a great book and it would take a big success in all over the world..

About "dowry"I didn't get your point too! :lol: Why should girls' families give money for the boys??!!! As you said it's insulting!
Then why do you always say "ask Mohsen"?! Well, I will ask Mohsen... but why don't you speak and explain to us about your traditions?! why do you always feel that you aren't a part of that society?! {-:

Dear Mohsen please explain to us the philosophy behind dowry action!!!!

Behnam, what I meant by dowry and what is happening here is that girls' families ask a high "مؤخر و مقدم" for their girls and that means that the boy here who should pay the money, they also ask for gold and a house too... The girls' families here pay nothing except the cost of the engagement party.

So what I was saying is: If the girls families just have a little sympathy with the boys and didn't ask for a high amount of money, spinsterhood matter would be solved!

Dear, I heard that in Iran the government force the girls to wear the hejab, is that right?! Why should they do that?! what is the point behind this action?!

Don't you think that they should give them the freedom to choose and decide what they want?! Another thing came to my mind, if god himself, when he put the rules, he put them and left the choice to us and let us choose between the bad and the good thing, therefore the government shouldn't force them!

When we are forced to do sth, it becomes like a habit or a costume not a religious matter! And it doesn't show if the person were a believer or not..

For example, here most of the women who hide their faces and cover them with black hejab are bad, they hide their action with this costume and try to deludes people that they are religious women..
Therefore, whenever someone ask me why don't I hide my face, I immediately say NO! And the bad idea about the women who wear it come to my mind!! They completely spoiled the meaning of it.

The same thing happened when when we force a bad girl to wear the hejab, it will give a bad idea for others about it -especially for non-Muslims..
For sure the next generation will hate the hejab just because of this irresponsible action.

Thanks for reading.

Best wishes,
Amal

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Thank you for giving me motivation!

Postby behnam » Sat Dec 28, 2013 12:03 pm

Hi Amal,

So many thanks for your motivational post. It includes some nice points and some challenging questions.


[amal] wrote:Then why do you always say "ask Mohsen"?! Well, I will ask Mohsen... but why don't you speak and explain to us about your traditions?! why do you always feel that you aren't a part of that society?!


Obviously, each individual, in accordance with his/her skills, talents and interests, likes and dislikes, etc. is expert at some special and limited areas. Nobody can claim that s/he is expert in all areas. As far as I know, our friend Mohsen is an eagle-eyed person when it comes to social based issues. In addition, I'd like to motivate him to be more active, because I love reading his posts.

[amal] wrote:Dear, I heard that in Iran the government force the girls to wear the hejab, is that right?! Why should they do that?! what is the point behind this action?!


To be honest with you, I don't know whether the government or any other organization forces females to wear Hejab. My wife and all the ladies in my relatives wear Hejab, no matter if the government puts pressures on it or not. We are Muslim and we have been Muslim for years. I personally do believe in Hejab and this belief is not affected by the action of others. If all people in the world opposed the Islamic Hejab, I'd support it! I do mean what I am saying.

Let's assume that the government or some organizations put emphasize on wearing Hejab. I support them. We are living in an Islamic country, so we are supposed to follow the instructions of Islam. Thankfully, Hejab is clearly mentioned in the Holy Koran, so there is no rooms or excuses for misinterpretation.

In an Islamic society, women have to wear Hejab. If the don't cover their bodies, they threaten the mental health of the society. How? Well, men get excited by seeing sexual scenes while there is nowhere to satisfy their desires. In some countries sex industry is legal, so men welcome sexual excitement, because they easily can go to some legal places and do what they like by paying a little money. In an Islamic country, sex industry is illegal. For the sake of safety and health, Islamic rules about Hejab MUST be followed completely.

In my view, women who respect themselves and want me to respect them NEVER put her bodies on display. If they trigger my sexual desires without offering a solution for that, it will be like showing a glass of ice-water to a thirsty person in the summer and describing the quality of it! It is cruel. Even in forests, in wildlife animals do not do like that! If you are not going to give me a glass of water, at least don't remind my the water and its benefits. Don't make me more thirsty!
:lol: :lol: :lol:
[amal] wrote:The same thing happened when when we force a bad girl to wear the hejab, it will give a bad idea for others about it -especially for non-Muslims.


A bad girl may have some good tempting things! :lol: :lol: :lol: In this case, the philosophy of forcing her to cover her body is protecting others from danger, not that bad girl, although Hejab can be useful even for that bad girl too. :lol:

There are many social problems in the societies. Hejab is one of them. Sometimes, the authorities purposely close their eyes to important areas of life such as economy, corruption, health, unemployment, etc. and draw attention to some minor problems. This is not acceptable. An Islamic country MUST smell Islam in all areas.

I have to leave right now. I guess this topic is worth discussing more and deeper.

It was sad to hear that your grandmother is sick. I wish health to your grandmother. May Allah protect her from all illness.

All the best,
Behnam, 28 December, 2013
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Richard Feynman’s Letter to His Departed Wife: “You, Dead, A

Postby behnam » Mon Dec 30, 2013 6:46 am

October 17, 1946

D’Arline,

I adore you, sweetheart.

I know how much you like to hear that — but I don’t only write it because you like it — I write it because it makes me warm all over inside to write it to you.

It is such a terribly long time since I last wrote to you — almost two years but I know you’ll excuse me because you understand how I am, stubborn and realistic; and I thought there was no sense to writing.

But now I know my darling wife that it is right to do what I have delayed in doing, and that I have done so much in the past. I want to tell you I love you. I want to love you. I always will love you.

I find it hard to understand in my mind what it means to love you after you are dead — but I still want to comfort and take care of you — and I want you to love me and care for me. I want to have problems to discuss with you — I want to do little projects with you. I never thought until just now that we can do that. What should we do. We started to learn to make clothes together — or learn Chinese — or getting a movie projector. Can’t I do something now? No. I am alone without you and you were the “idea-woman” and general instigator of all our wild adventures.

When you were sick you worried because you could not give me something that you wanted to and thought I needed. You needn’t have worried. Just as I told you then there was no real need because I loved you in so many ways so much. And now it is clearly even more true — you can give me nothing now yet I love you so that you stand in my way of loving anyone else — but I want you to stand there. You, dead, are so much better than anyone else alive.

I know you will assure me that I am foolish and that you want me to have full happiness and don’t want to be in my way. I’ll bet you are surprised that I don’t even have a girlfriend (except you, sweetheart) after two years. But you can’t help it, darling, nor can I — I don’t understand it, for I have met many girls and very nice ones and I don’t want to remain alone — but in two or three meetings they all seem ashes. You only are left to me. You are real.

My darling wife, I do adore you.

I love my wife. My wife is dead.

Rich.

PS Please excuse my not mailing this — but I don’t know your new address.
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Richard Feynman’s Letter to His Departed Wife!

Postby behnam » Mon Dec 30, 2013 7:17 am

Hi friends,

Some people blame physicists for being cold and strict. In order to deny this false accusation, I am putting the letter of Richard Feynman to his dead wife! I leave the judgement to you.

In June 1945, the 27-year-old physicist Richard Feynman lost his wife, Arline Feynman, to tuberculosis. Only 25 years old, she was Richard’s high-school sweetheart. And yet she was much more. As Lawrence Krauss writes in 2012 biography on Feynman:


Richard and Arline were soul mates. They were not clones of each other, but symbiotic opposites – each completed the other. Arline admired Richard’s obvious scientific brilliance, and Richard clearly adored the fact that she loved and understood things he could barely appreciate at the time. But what they shared, most of all, was a love of life and a spirit of adventure.


October 17, 1946

D’Arline,

I adore you, sweetheart.

I know how much you like to hear that — but I don’t only write it because you like it — I write it because it makes me warm all over inside to write it to you.

It is such a terribly long time since I last wrote to you — almost two years but I know you’ll excuse me because you understand how I am, stubborn and realistic; and I thought there was no sense to writing.

But now I know my darling wife that it is right to do what I have delayed in doing, and that I have done so much in the past. I want to tell you I love you. I want to love you. I always will love you.

I find it hard to understand in my mind what it means to love you after you are dead — but I still want to comfort and take care of you — and I want you to love me and care for me. I want to have problems to discuss with you — I want to do little projects with you. I never thought until just now that we can do that. What should we do. We started to learn to make clothes together — or learn Chinese — or getting a movie projector. Can’t I do something now? No. I am alone without you and you were the “idea-woman” and general instigator of all our wild adventures.

When you were sick you worried because you could not give me something that you wanted to and thought I needed. You needn’t have worried. Just as I told you then there was no real need because I loved you in so many ways so much. And now it is clearly even more true — you can give me nothing now yet I love you so that you stand in my way of loving anyone else — but I want you to stand there. You, dead, are so much better than anyone else alive.

I know you will assure me that I am foolish and that you want me to have full happiness and don’t want to be in my way. I’ll bet you are surprised that I don’t even have a girlfriend (except you, sweetheart) after two years. But you can’t help it, darling, nor can I — I don’t understand it, for I have met many girls and very nice ones and I don’t want to remain alone — but in two or three meetings they all seem ashes. You only are left to me. You are real.

My darling wife, I do adore you.

I love my wife. My wife is dead.

Rich.

PS Please excuse my not mailing this — but I don’t know your new address.


*****************************************************************



}: }: }: }: }: }: }: }: }: }:

This can be called love!

All the best,
Behnam, 30 December, 2013
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Why not?

Postby Elham » Tue Dec 31, 2013 2:12 pm

Why not?

I feel like writing. Why not? I used to write in this thread and although for some good reasons I stopped it, today again I feel like writing here. Part of me is in Let's learn together. Part of true me is in here and I can decide weather or not to write in it.

There are some thoughts in my mind right now. One of them is a question I'm asking myself :" How can we have opinions about things? " What makes us an opinionated person?"

Last night I watched " Casabelanca" . As I've heard it's a very famous movie.
What makes a film famous? I watched it, but if you ask me to give my opinion about it, I really don't know what to say. I just can say, it was good. I liked some of the features of the main character of the film. He was somehow serious and strict but full of emotion. I liked his personality as a "MAN"! I don't know what words I can use to describe him as a MAN but I just know he was attractive as a man.
But if you ask me about the story, I don't know how to talk about. So I wonder how I should be able to discuss sth?

I read a book today. I had heard about it. It's " kafe piano" ! after reading it , now, I wonder how I should judge it?

I think it needs experience.You should have read many books and watched too much movies and know many things to be able to have opinions about sth.

Anyway, right now I'm lack of enough information and experience to discuss things.


Dear Behnam has written about love. I think I'm familiar with love. I don't care what love is for in reality, or why god has created it, to make men and women make love and have babies or other things.
I just like to like it. Love is beautiful and makes life worth to live. I like love for itself and I'd like to believe love exists just for the sake of love. For those great feelings we have while we're in love. For the beauty and sweetness it adds to our lives. For the wonderful moments it creates between two persons. For sure love is a creator, a great creator.What dose it create? The good feelings that love brings with itself, the peace that it gives to our moments, the wonderful smell it spreads all over our life, most importantly the beauty of a great connection that loves makes between two heart, two soul and two body is a magic.

I love love and ask for more and more of it. Love is essence of life. I love to breath it. :-)
Nothing is comparable with liking some one deeply. No feeling is comparable with it when you some where deep down feel " you love some one" ! It warms your heart , soul and body and you don't want to change it with anything else in the world.

A baby can be the fruit of a beautiful love but I don't believe it's the reason for it. It may just be an ideal but I don't care. :-D


......

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behnam
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Happy New Year!

Postby behnam » Tue Dec 31, 2013 5:29 pm

Hi friends,

I'd like to say '
Happy New Year' to those use Gregorian calendar. I hope 2014 will bring more happiness, peace, health, and prosperity. I also hope you will make some good New Year Resolutions and will STICK to them! I wish you good luck and lasting happiness.

All the best,
Behnam, 31 December, 2013
ارادتمند شما
*بهنام *

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Mohsen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Mohsen » Tue Dec 31, 2013 9:05 pm



Dear Amal,

I hope you and your family are in health

In fact the burden of explaining about dowry fell to me , well , I do it

First it is better to know what the dowry is, or what we speak about it as a dowry. We have two kinds of dowries, the dowry which is given to bride by bride groom' family and the dowry which is taken to bride groom house by bride's family.
The dowry which is on boy'charge is called Mehr ( mehrieh),it is written officially in a document as a marriage contract. That is included the following items

1-A copy of holy book ( Quran) ,
2- traditionally the amount of prophet 'daughter ( Hazarat Fatima) ,the dowry which Imam Ali (AS) gave to her wife ,as a blessing is inserted in this document.
3- A special Mirror
4- Gold , a set ( necklace ,bracelet ,earrings )
5- Pilgrimage to Mecca
6- The ownership of a house or a part of a house should be officially given to girl.

All of the articles in this document are negotiable and before the wedding ceremony , both families come to the agreement in amicably atmosphere.

It is better to know that in Iran marriage has two steps , first the girl and boy officially are registered as a wife and husband , in this step the the amount of dowry which is undertaken by boy fixed ,and it is written on a paper as a document ,the close relatives sign the document as witnesses . In this step relatives and friends from both families gather in big saloon and received by fruits , ice-cream, drinks , confectioneries , and special marriage contract cake.
Before the ceremony starts , the bride was taken to hairdresser salon and the bride groom decorate his car with flowers and pick up the bride from hairdresser salon and comes to the party .
During the ceremony bride and bride groom sit in special place and a clergy man invites the couple to declare their consent by addressing them some special words and sentences. After the bride answers positively , they are called wife and husband. Then the couple divided the cake ,the cake distributed among the people in saloon.

The dowry which is given by bride's family is called Tocher. The apparatuses and furniture which are taken by the bride to her husband's house is called "Tocher". This word is taken from Arabic word "jahaz" or "jahiziyeh"
The preparing bride's tocher is one of the most important things. Here under we are going to make a list of things that usually includes in the bride's tocher.
1) Bride and groom's bedroom furniture: It includes double bed, end tables, commode, dresser, bed sheets and pillow clothes. Some extra bedclothes, bed sheets and pillow covers for guest. Some bedclothes, bed sheets, and pillow covers for guest.
2) Proper curtains for each window for example: curtain for kitchen, bedrooms and living room.
3) Living room furniture, dinner table and chairs.
4) Carpet
5) Vacuum
6) Decorative things such as pictures, drawings and different statuettes.
7) Clock or horologe.
8) Library
9) Refrigerator (Refrigerator)
10) One set of chinaware and porelain dishes or plates
11) Washing machine
12) Gas burner (over)
13) One set of autoclave, stew pan and pan.
14) Crystal dishes for different purposes. Utensil and kitchenware.
15) Few sets of glasses
16) Tableware.
17) Samovar, and teapot. Plus a teaset
18) Set of spoon and fork
19) Sets of Fork and knife plus dessert plates.
20) Knife, colander and ladle
21) Water bottle, flask, cruse and glassware
22) Boxes of castor or condiment and spice boxes place for the tea, sugar, and sugar loaf 23) Kitchen apron and towels
24) Fridge Special utensils
25) Boskets and plastic dustbins in different sizes
26) Trencher and special boards for cutting meat and green vegetables
27) Electrical mill 28) Preparing boxes of legume, cereal, rice, spices, tea and sugar.
29) Rope for hanging cloths and clothespin.
30) Workbag, some colorful bobbins needle and scissors.
31) Separate towels for bride and groom
32) Necessary things for bath and washroom.
33) Few nightgowns and pajama plus various underwears for the bride
34) Towels 35) Iron and its cover
36) Crystal vases in different sizes.

The tocher is a conventional custom among the people , it is not obligatory , so the value of different ,it is cost from 10000$ to 1000000$ , it depends on the financial ability of girls family.
As I told you in Iran marriage has two steps , I explained about the first step , After the couple were called wife and husband , they don't live together until the second ceremony. It may takes between 3 months to 2 years. When the bride groom buys or rent his house , the bride's family send a person to that house to measure the doors and windows for curtain , the bride choose her curtain and they will be installed behind the doors and windows. Then a date is fixed for bringing all of tocher to the bride groom 's house.
Another wedding party will be hold and people invited for dinner . After finishing the party Bride and bride groom goes to their new house by riding their decorated car , and their family and relatives and friends follow them in their car , the make a lot of noise in the streets by horns of their car and finally throw the new couple in their new house to have the first night of life together.

It is a long story , it is 12.45 and I should go to bed , if you didn't get the story ,please feel free to ask me any detail
All the best
Mohsen

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Mohsen
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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby Mohsen » Tue Dec 31, 2013 9:09 pm

Good night Elham,

Welcome my friend , I don't know why you left us ,but I am happy to see your post.

Wish you the best
Mohsen

shahrubanu
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Hi, dear Behnam,Amal and Elham

Postby shahrubanu » Tue Dec 31, 2013 9:27 pm

I feel your great friendship in my heart deeply.I really like your friendship.Please forgive me I couldn t write here for a long time,because I m very busy.As you know,I have started to teach in a private school,working in here makes me very tired.I don t know what I m going to do }: I don t want to work in here anymore ,but I have to need regular salary.I haven t got time to read books,watch films or sign to internet.In brief, I have no time for my personal life.
I want to teach in a puplic school soon otherwise I will be a person who is out of life
I always need your friendships, I love your friendship.You create a beautiful place in my life..
All you are very precious for me ,please always hold this fact in your mind..
I wish all your dreams come true soon in this new year.I wish Allah always protects you..

Great love to my friends..


Shahrubanu

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Re: Let's learn together!

Postby arman » Thu Jan 02, 2014 8:48 am

Hello! I have been away for long time and I would admit that I miss this forum. Anyway, I see this thread earlier and caught my attention. I like all posted discussion here. I read all threads here. It seems that all who posted here know each other well. Happy new year to all!

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behnam
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Welcome Elham!

Postby behnam » Thu Jan 02, 2014 8:49 am

Hi Elham,

It was very nice reading your post. Thank you very much for sharing your opinion with us. I appreciate it. There is no doubt that this thread is your home, and you have got a sense of belonging. You are most welcome!

My first post in 2014 is addressed to you. I hope we will write to each other regularly.

Hope to here from you soon.

All the best,
Behnam, 2 January, 2014
ارادتمند شما
*بهنام *


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